W12: Relationships and Attraction Flashcards
How do we relate to others?
- Exchange relationships
- Interactions based on equity and reciprocity
- input-to-output ratio should at least be equal
p Tend to be short-term (E.g., business relations) - Communal relationships
- interactions based on principle of need
- no need to be equal, tends to be long-term
How do exchange relationships work?
People tend to seek out interactions that have more rewards than costs, or have the smallest amount of “excess cost” possible.
- Making comparisons (from current our alternative relationships)
- Equity Theory (pursuing of fairness)
What is the attachment theory?
Theory about how our early attachments with our parents shape our relationships for the rest of our lives
What are the attachment theory styles in infants (according to Ainsworth)?
- Secure Attachment
- Anxious Attachment
- Avoidant Attachment
What are attachment styles in adults?
- Secure Attachment
- Anxious-ambivalent Attachment
- Avoidant (dismissive) Attachment
- Avoidant (anxious) Attachment
What are the three factors affecting attraction?
- Proximity
- Similarity
- Physical Attractiveness
Why does proximity lead to friendship?
- More likely that you will run to each other
- Expectation of frequent interaction with a person motivates you to ensure mutual liking
- Mere exposure effect (the more you are exposed to a person, the more you like them)
Does similarity or differences lead to greater attraction?
The belief that “opposites attract” is not strongly supported by research.
If two people have complementary personality traits, they might work well together
E.g., a dependent person with a nurturer
However, they still need similarity in other areas to be compatible, like personality traits, interests/hobbies, or backgrounds.
Why does physical attractiveness lead to attraction?
Halo Effect: The belief that attractive people have a host of positive qualities that extend beyond physical appearance
- Self-Fulfilling Prophecies: behaving more positively towards them because you have higher expectations towards them
- Cultural Stereotypes: independent vs dependent cultures
Are perceptions of attractiveness universal?
Evolutionary perspective: We prefer people whose physical features signal reproductive fitness—the capacity to pass one’s genes to subsequent generations.
- Bilateral Symmetry
- Averageness
Do men and women differ in what they find attractive?
YES: EVOLUTIONARY ARGUMENT
- Parental Investment: Because women must invest more in a given child, they should be choosier
They should select mates based on ability to provide resources (e.g. wealth, skills, status) to offspring
Because men have a lower investment, they can be less choosy
They should select mates based on ability to biologically produce good offspring (e.g. youth, attractiveness)
NO: are there really sex differences?
Women in most cultures tend to have less power, fewer resources
In cultures with greater gender equality, women place less importance on status/resources, more importance on physical attractiveness
- Women with the same level of power/status as men are just as likely to be promiscuous, have affairs, etc.
- It’s really about resource/power differences, rather than sex differences!
What are the 3 types of love?
- Companionate love
- Compassionate love (monitoring, responding to another person’s needs)
- Passionate/romantic love (relationship with intense emotion/sexual desire)
Why do some relationships last, but not others?
Investment Model of Commitment
- Satisfaction
- Alternative partners
- Investments
(SAI)
What are the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse (indicators of dissatisfaction)?
- Contempt
Expressing disdain or scorn - Criticism
Expressing negative evaluations, being overly critical - Defensiveness
Trying to “play the victim” and not accepting responsibility for your part - Stonewalling
Withdrawing from the conflict; ignoring and/or avoiding the issue
(CCDS)
