Relational Style Flashcards
What two values are measured?
Upper Value – Empathetic
Experiences the emotions others are having as if the emotion were their own
Lower Value – Insulated
Experiences their own emotions and observes the emotions of others
What two things are not measured?
Not Sympathy
Not Compassion
What are characteristics of nurturers?
86 - 99.5 Nurturers move into emotional expressions and nurture the other person’s emotion toward the Nurturer’s emotional position by empathetically sharing their emotion and committing to each other non-rationally; on a “without thinking about it” level.
What are some characteristics of empathizers?
66 - 85 They project strong empathetic warmth that is usually so forceful it is reciprocated. However, this commits them to a bond with the other person and the other person can feel the emotional responsibility of this bond.
What are some characteristics of negotiators?
36 - 65 They want fairness between emotional expression and emotional responsibility. Because they are both empathetic and rational, whether they show an empathic mood or “cold” rationale will often be in response to whichever one is “out of balance” at the moment. When they do both (detach and bond) in the same situation they can seem to others to “waffle” or be inconsistent.
What are some characteristics of a verbalizer?
16 - 35 The Verbalizer’s emotions build up quickly, express themselves loudly, and subside quickly. So, rather than seeing the emotions around them as a natural ebb and flow, they tend to see them as momentary.
What are some characteristics of an observer?
.5 - 15 The Observer will rarely, if ever, react to emotion even though they sometimes act with emotion. In most cases, however, the observer sees emotion as something to keep under control and certainly not something that has any bearing on what you should do or how you should think.
What are the abilities and limits of the nurturer?
Percentile Range: 86% - 99.5%
Primary Skill:
Projects affirmation to produce personal and organizational commitment
Process View:
Empathetically “hears” an emotional need
Projects an empowering and/or nurturing emotional response. Communicates openness and acceptance non-verbally. Commits to including others in their layered network of relationships
Pragmatic Limits:
Negative Trigger: “You care too much about people”
Positive Response: Promote group interactions even when there is negativity involved in order to “clear the air” publicly
Personal Need:
Unity, peace, and consistent expressions of affirmation
What are the empathizer abilities and limits?
Percentile Range: 66% - 85%
Primary Skill:
Drains negativity to produce a positive environment
Process View:
Empathetically “hears” negative emotion
Filters out negative emotions and expresses positive emotions
Uses a ‘deflect / depart’ response if overloaded
Expresses loyalty in their network
Pragmatic Limits:
Negative Trigger: “You take on too much responsibility for a group’s positive energy”
Positive Response: Not allowing the emotions of a group or an individual to detract from what needs to be done
Personal Need:
To encourage, and to be encouraged
What are the abilities and limits of negotiators?
Percentile Range: 36% - 65%
Primary Skills:
Balances sensitivity and rational analysis
Process View:
Senses “out-of-balance” situations and moves to add the opposite emotional mood
Tries to balance the importance of the cause of the emotion with the level of emotion expressed Creates commitments that have appropriate levels of emotionalism and rationality. Makes decisions that are “fair” or insists on “fairness”
Pragmatic Limit:
Negative Trigger: “You do not understand my feelings”
Positive Response: Acknowledge where a person is coming from by verbalizing their perception and then giving yours
Personal Need:
That everyone is being heard and treated fairly, them included
What are the abilities and limits of a verbalizer?
Percentile Ranges: 16% - 35%
Primary Skill: Creates emotional authenticity around negative situations
Process View:
Identifies inconsistent emotional expressions
Filters out positive emotions to reveal negative issues or emotions
Creates freedom to verbalize feelings and is okay with conflict
Builds an open relational network
Pragmatic Limit:
Negative Trigger: “You are insensitive”
Positive Response: Learn to create authenticity through positive comments so as not to contribute to disharmony in a group
Personal Need:
Emotional authenticity and “peace and quiet” emotionally
What are the abilities and limits of an observer?
Percentile Range: 0.5% - 15%
Primary Skill:
Promotes rational, analytical responses
Process View:
Responds to conflict with stoicism and/or emotional reserve
Creates isolation around volatile or emotional people to subdue emotional intensity
Creates an analytical view of the “problem”
Gives loyalty to selected (worthy) people
Pragmatic Limit:
Negative Trigger: “You do not care enough about people”
Positive Response: Acknowledge other’s emotions… demonstrate you are interested… use words that communicate empathy or understanding
Personal Need:
To deal with “the facts” of a matter and that people take personal responsibility for their emotions
Relational style review
Relational Scale: Describes HOW You Influence with Emotion
Upper Value – Empathetic
Experiences the emotions others are having as if the emotion were their own.
Lower Value – Insulated
Experiences their own emotions and observes the emotions of others.
Not Sympathy; Not Compassion
