Principles of Management Flashcards
Nature of Principles of Management
Principal (Meenakshi Sahni) goes to nature to teach management students from Harvard wearing suits and red ties, and Target Managers.
1. Universal Applicability - Continuing her walk, she reaches universe and finds an apple tree there.
2. General Guidelines - Students are not able to enter, so she calls the general to guide the students into the universe.
3. Formed By Practice and Experimentation - They form a straight line. They practice marching and are finally able to enter. They grab an apple and take it into the lab for experimentaiton.
4. Flexible - They observe that the apple is very flexible, almost like slime.
5. Mainly Behavioural - Many bees come from a small artificial river nearby, and start trying to eat the apple.
6. Cause and Effect Relationship - They develop a cause and effect relationship that the bees are attacking apple because it is from the universe. Relationship is called to protect from bees, so relatives come in mini flying ship, with cash and the apple effects the gravity of the ship and causes the relationship to crash.
7. Contigent - They collect the bees and the ship in a cone and crush it using a tin and throw it in the gents washroom’s urinal.
Importance of Principles of Management
Principal goes to management school into Principal’s office and takes out VIP with useful swiss army knife with magnifying glass.
1. Providing Managers with Useful Insights into Reality - She is taken to class where the managers are provided with useful swiss army knife to insight into real juice.
2.Optimum Utilisation of Resources and Effective Administration - Everyone is given sauces to utilise however they’d like. They need to find the optimum balance between juice and sauces for optimum effect. So everyone mixes sauce and juice, and chaos is created with sauces flying everywhere. They are then effectively adminstered to sit properly.
3. Scientific Decisions - A scientist finally enters with a dish. He opens the dish to show everyone the perfect mixture.
4. Meeting Changing Enviroment Requirements - As soon as he takes a sip, the enviroment changes serverely and there is a blizzard. A meeting is called among the global heads to see what is required to change the enviroment.
5. Fulfilling Social Responsibility - Baba Ramdev (social) comes with race-wala pony into meeting. It turns out society is responsible for this change in enviroment. A giant hole has opened up in the earth, and it must be filled.
6. Management Training, Education and Research - Research is done on how to close the hole. Public is educated about the dangers of the hole. It turns out managers must go in train inside hole, and the hole will automatically close. Managers in train go inside hole, and everything becomes fine.
Taylor’s Principles of Management
Tailor is called to Principal’s office. Over there a target manager is already sitting.
1. Harmony, Not Discord - Manager starts playing harmonium and tailor then starts doing disco using disco ball. The manager screams that only harminum, and no disc and takes the cord out of his disco ball.
2. Science, Not Rule of Thumb - Taylor doesn’t listen, so Science teacher (Anupama Ma’am) is called, and upon seeing this she hits taylor with ruler on thumb and taylor says no please don’t.
3. Co-operation, Not Individualism - Taylors thumbs starts bleeding, so he calls cops and asks for operation to be done on his thumb. The cops note down all the individual witnesses.
4. Development of Each and Every Person to His or Her Greatest Efficiency and Prosperity - Dev D is called because everyone is looking very sad. So Dev D goes to each and every person and bends, gives greatest fish and proposes.
Techniques of Scientific Management
A technician and scientist are called by Target manager to his office.
1. Functional Foremanship - The manager tells them they have been selected to go in a wedding function with them. When they enter the function room, it is simply white space. Four people are already waiting there, and four mencome in a ship.
First four men, who were already there are made planning incharge.
i. Instruction Card Clerk - First peron is given card with instruction on how to eat perk.
ii. Route Clerk - Second is given map with routes for function.
iii. Time and Cost Clerk - Third is given costly watch to ensure function is ready in time
iv. Disciplinarian - Fourth is given dish with plane inside to play with.
The other four men are made production incharge, to ensure function is actually prepared.
i. Speed Boss - One starts building loads of speed breakers as bosses will come in speedy cars (F1)
ii. Gang Boss - Secon one calls gang to ensure their is no stopping of function.
iii. Repairs Boss - The gang comes and shoots all the speed breakers. So the third person keeps on reparing the speed breakers.
iv. Inspectors - On hearing the shooting, inspector AP Pradyuman comes and stops function.
2. Standardisation and Simplification of Work - The scientist is arrested and taken to a village in India. He is told he will only get bail when he simplifies the work of the villagers, so he gives a talk and all the farmers stand listening to him.
i. Reduce Given Line to Fixed Types - He first tell them to reduce materials used and only use a fixed amount of water that he will give them in a small glass bottle.
ii. Establish Standards of Quality - He tells them that this water is of very high standard of quality, and will make crops grow faster.
iii. Interchangability of Parts - He says that after drinking this water, man will change into interchangeable parts and people can interchange among themselves, so don’t drink it unless necessary.
iv. Establishes Standards of Perfomance - He says that if you want the water you will have to stand and perform, and the same amount of time you men perform for, same amount of time machines will perform for after putting the special water in them.
3. Method Study - The scientist sleeps that night thinking he has tricked the farmers. He then sees that the farmers are getting huge profits by growing methi. So he runs away to the town to grow methi before the farmers catch him.
i. Best Way - He wants to discover the scientific best way that is fastest to grow methi.
ii. Minimise Cost - He does his experiments and grows it. He carries his lab-grown methi in bullock cart, to minimise cost.
iii. Maximize Quality and Satisfaction - He sells it at the market, and everyone thinks it is of maximum quality and get very satisfied and satiated after eating it, so everyone else fights to get more of it.
4. Motion Study - Everyone starts chasing him for more and more so he runs into a forest. Suddenly he feels like passing motion.
i. Incident - Then there is a incident, where he gets schocked upon seeing a snake.
ii. Avoiding Unnecesary Movements and Lifting of Objectives - So he avoids any unnecessary movements, and goes closer to the snake and lifts it, and throws it away.
iii. Motion is Productive - He gets very happy after that and passes motion productively.
iii. Motion is Unproductive - He feels so happy that he goes there again the next day just to pass motion, but this time motion is unproductive so he gets unhappy.
iv. Videography - He gets a movie videography camera and vlogs the entire thing and tries to track everything to see why it is not coming.
5. Time Study - He sees the time and realizes its getting very late. Next day he tries again.
i. Incentive to Labour - This time he tries again but asks labour to help him. Labour refuse instantly thinking its disgusting. He incentivisie them by offering more money.
ii. Number of Labour Required and Cost - A number of labour join him, and his required cost increases vastly.
iii. Standard Time - Finally, he is able to pass motion in standard time.
6. Fatigue Study - A fat labourer is there.
i. Rest at Regular Interval - The fat labourer gets tired very fast, and takes rest at regular interval, by eating a sandhwich.
ii Cause of Fatigue, Frequency of Rest Intervals and How to Imrove Working Conditions - Scientist gets more fascinated by the fatty then his own motions, so he tries to study the cause of his fatigue, frequency of rest intervals and how to improve work condition.
iii. Tired and Rest - The fat labourer gets angry upon his experimentation and too tired so he decides to rest on top of the scientist.
7. Differential Piece Wage System - Finally the scientist designs a wage system where different workers get different number of pieces of cake depending on how much they work.
Henry Fayol’s Principles of Management
You fail in bst so you are taken to the principle to get properly managed.
1. Division of Work - You are sent to sun. Over there principle has placed stones at division of one kilomoeter. The stones are shaped in division sign. Your work is to collect all of the stones. You collect a few, and feel it is too hot so you ask to go back.
2. Authority and Responsibility - Ma’am then places a giant shoe and asks you to write bs book on that. So after writing writing, you become author. The bottom half of the shoe is complete, to complete the top half you have to sit on race-wala pony and then write.
3. Discipline - Ma’am still isn’t happy. The break time bell rings. She thinks this is the perfect opportunity. She makes you sit on top of tree and asks you to make sure there is displine in the field. You hold dish mein plane and throw the plane at people causing havoc.
4. Unity of Command - You go home, and at the door, aunty is standing with her commandos. She knows that you’ve failed, so aunty of command that you will make murga.
5. Unity of Direction - You try and run away but Aunty follows you with knife. While looking back you both crash into director Karan Johar.
6. Subordination of Individual Interest to General Interest - After crashing and falling down, you get a cold. So you take out small individual vicks from left pocket, and after applying nothing happens. So then you take out large general vicks from right pocket, and your cold gets better. General comes to you and says that give this personal interest vicks to us, all my subordinates need it. So you give many vicks for subordinates.
7. Remuneration of Employees - So instead of money, renumeration of employees is oven with vicks inside. You get hungry, and go inside to see near oven remo fernandes nari ke saat dance kar raha hain.
8. Centralization and Decentralization - When you see this inside, you call the police. The police seeing a plate in your hand, get schocked and take you to central jail which is in d shaped central jail. You get very bad food in plate, and don’t feel like eating.
9. Scalar Chain - You see Jailor put wine inside wine fridge. He forgets to lock it and you try taking some, but as soon as Jailor sees this he ties you in a chain of scales and beats you up with a scale.
10. Order - Next morning, he is still angry at you. So he asks you to put hen in order, and hen lay egg one by one in order from front to back.
11. Equity - After this you are finally released from jail. As soon as you go outside, you see a stick. You see ambani approaching you, so you beat him up and take his costly equity shares.
12. Stability of Personnel - You run ahead as sirens start playing again. On the road you then find a swan. You pick up the swan and put it up on a stabaliser, and and all personnel crowd it, treating it like god.
13. Initiative - Out of one the personnel, is your girlfriend. As soon as you see her, you take out your heart, sign your initials on it, and give it to her.
14. Espirit De Corps - You can’t seem to put your heart back in, so you collapse on a chair, and your spirit comes out. You see cops take away your corpse.
