Pages 1-9

Question 1

Narrorator: And up until a few weeks ago, this now eleven year old boy had only the regular problems of a child in 1991.

Answer 1

Wayne: Aw, man. (Blowing on a Gameboy)

Question 2

(an owl comes screeching in and yelling)

Answer 2

Wayne: Uh… Uncle Dave? A bird flew into our living room and dropped a piece of paper that days IM A WIZARD AND I NEED TO GO TO SCHOOL IN ENGLAND?

Question 3

Uncle Dave: …Uh, what kinda bird?

Answer 3

Wayne: An owl, I think?

Question 4

Professor McG: Um. Granger, Her…Her-mee-oh-nay?

Answer 4

Wayne: Question. Hypothetical. What if I don’t have enough of a personality for the magic talking hat to sort me? Like…how much authority does this hat really have? Never mind…This [lace is crazy huh? I never thought I’d go to a school in a castle. Pretty cool. I’ve neverr really liked school. People were mean. To me. I’m talking too much. You probably have all your own nervous thoughts going on…Can I tell you something? I think I might be…special? I watch a lot of movies and read lots of books, and it’s like: a normal boy finds out he actually has amazing abilities and is swept away to a new, magical world? Does that sound familiar? Because that is now my ACTUAL life. And THAT kid, through some incredible circumstances always becomes like the most important person. Like in the whole world. A sort of…Chosen One. AHH! Magic is real, and this orphaned boy wizard is ready for seven years of amazing adventures!

Question 5

Professor McG: Oh. Look. It’s…another one. Um…uh. Student?

Answer 5

Wayne: Wayne Hopkins.

Question 6

Leanne: Guys. Guess what? We’re ALL WIZARDS.

Answer 6

Puffs: Yeah…

Question 7

J. Finch: Hey, we should all introduce ourselves! I’m J. Finch Fletchley. I’m boyish and fun.

Answer 7

Puffs: Hi!

Question 8

Susie Bones: I’m Susie Bones. Once upon a time my entire family was murdered. Except my aunt.

Answer 8

Puffs: Hi!

Question 9

Puffs: (This is after Susie) Hi!

Answer 9

Wayne: I’m Wayne, I’ve read the SImilarillion, twice.

Question 10

Sally Perks: I’m Sally Perks, and I go to this school!

Answer 10

Puffs: HI!

Question 11

Ernie Mac: Who’s that? It’s me, Ernie Mac! I’m basically the best so…hi.

Answer 11

Puffs: Hi!

Question 12

Leanne: I was raised in a cabin, by my grandparents and you’re the first other children I’ve ever seen, oh and I am a wizard. And my name is Leanne.

Answer 12

Puffs: Hi?

Question 13

Megan Jones: Yep. That’s right. Just so we’re clear. I’m not like you. Any of you. Leave me alone.

Answer 13

Wayne: H…..

Question 14

Cedric:…This year, we’re going to win. Or, we’re going to get second. OR< we’re going to get third. Third or nothing!

Answer 14

Puffs: Third or nothing, third or nothing. THIRD OR NOTHING!

Question 15

Cedric: Whoever wins the most points? They’d be a real hero.

Answer 15

Wayne: Me?

Question 16

Megan: So, it’s official. The next seven years are gonna suck. Can you believe this group of dingbats?

Answer 16

Wayne: I think everyone seems nice.

Question 17

Megan: Um… everyone knows that my mom worked for… You know Who

Answer 17

Wayne and Oliver: Who?

Question 18

Megan: The dark lord?

Answer 18

Wayne and Oliver: Who?

Question 19

Megan: Whatever, the guy was a super evil wizard.

Answer 19

Wayne and Oliver: THERE ARE EVIL WIZARDS?

Question 20

Megan: Ugh. I’m going to hang out with the snakes. Where I belong.

Answer 20

Wayne: You can’t leave, you might lose points.

Question 21

Megan Exits

Answer 21

Wayne: So. You new to all of this too?

Question 22

Oliver: Yep. All of it.

Answer 22

Wayne: You’re…not british!

Question 23

Oliver: …so they’d be closer to me when I started at the Mathematical Institute at Oxford this summer.

Answer 23

Wayne: But you’re eleven.

Question 24

Oliver: …You don’t think that ending up here means we’re already bad at wizard-ing right? I’m not used to being bad at school.

Answer 24

Wayne: We just have to focus on earning those points and the rest will take care of itself. I mean, it’s just magic. How hard can it possibly be?