Module 1: Phases of Helping Flashcards
Unconditional Positive Regard
Accepts clients as a person of worth and dignity
“The expression of warmth requires a non judgmental attitude and an avoidance of blaming. Warmth involves acceptance of the equal worth of others… Non-possessive warmth entails a feeling of caring and concern without placing conditions on the relationship
Warmth is a precursor to trust
Genuineness
Ability to focus and listen
Self aware and therefore congruent… requires the maturity and skills to be able to express these feelings in the context of a warm and empathetic relationship
Empathy
Able to put yourself in someone else’s situation
Advanced/inferred empathetic responses are framed from hints and non verbal cues
Overcoming Listening Obstacles (8)
- Being Patient
- Encouraging Trust
- Controlling Noise
- Staying Focused
- Controlling Assumptions
- Managing Personal Reactions
- Knowing that listening does not mean agreeing
- Being aware of blind spots
Being Patient
People need time to frame and develop their ideas
Those who lack the ability to express themselves often use words that are vague and ambiguous or contradictory
It takes patience to wait and request clarification rather than assuming or hurrying the person who is speaking
Encouraging Trust
Messages can be incomplete or missing information because of trust issues especially early in the phases of helping
Holding back or hesitation is common
The environment has to be safe and clients may test the waters by hinting at information or important concerns to check out the helper’s reaction.
Controlling Noise
Once sent messages must receive and interpreted acurately
The environment needs to be free from distraction and interruption.. i.e phones, cells should be turned off
Staying Focused
Listening requires focus
We think faster than people talk
Mental involvement is essential-ask yourself what does the client mean by this? What are key points?
Stay present with what is said not what is anticipated
Internal noise can interfere
Controlling Assumptions
Assumptions and preconceptions lurk behind silence and become obvious to astute clients
Don’t assume anything… ask
Managing Personal Reactions
Tension and reactions may be aroused by the client’s telling of their story, which can hinder our capacity to listen.
Our reactions erect listening barriers
Helpers need to become confident in their skills and abilities so that they can tolerate clients’ feelings, reactions with a minimum of defensive reactions that obscure listening and understanding
Knowing that listening does not mean agreeing
Exploring, holding biases in abeyance as we try to see the world in our client’s eyes then decided that our own position is the better, does not mean that we did not listen
Being aware of blind spots
Helpers may have blind spots that make it difficult for them to hear or understand their clients.
Helpers are vulnerable when they have unrecognized or unresolved problems that are parallel to those of their clients
Silence
Silence in counselling is a skill- attended silence-eye contact, self discipline, focus
6 Meanings of SIlence
- Client is thinking- time to process
- Client is confused and unsure of what to say or do - need for clarity
- Client is encountering painful feelings - space
- Client is dealing with issues of trust - hesitation to share
- Silence is the client’s usual way - by nature
- Client has reached closure - seek clarification through a check out
Phases of Counselling
- Preliminary
- Beginning
- Action
- Ending