Lecture 19-20: Sex and Infidelity

Question 1

Why is Sex Hard to Study?

Answer 1

• Unlike almost every other relationship construct, it cannot be directly observed.
• Mostly self-report; subject to individual inhibitions and social taboos. ( people may feel embarrassed).
• Very little experimental control; We cannot randomly assign sex conditions.
• Hard to discover whether sex causes certain things in relationships.
• Viewed as an important part of relationships, but not more important than other constructs.

Question 2

Reasons for Sexual Decline

Answer 2

Habituation, children, getting older, satisfaction, religion.

Question 3

Sexual Decline: Habituation

Answer 3

• Longer term relationships report less sexual desire and arousal.
• After establishing intimacy, you don’t need to do it anymore because you already have it.
• Repeated exposure, getting used to it, deleptes arousal to it.

Question 4

Sexual Decline: Chidlren

Answer 4

• Pregnancy is uncomfortable and tiring.
• Reestablishing sexual intimacy less important to women after childbirth.
• Kids are exhausting (was sleep too tired divided attention.

Question 5

Sexual Decline: Getting Older

Answer 5

• Aging; fragile, tired more.
• Very large factor.

Question 6

STUDY: MACNEIL AND BYERS (2009); Communication and Sexual Satifaction

Answer 6

Found: Most couples don’t communicate about sex.
- Partners who reported more sexual self disclosure, also reported greater sexual satisfaction.

Question 7

What Factors Predict Good Sex?

Answer 7

Relationship quality and actual sex.

Question 8

Good Sex Predictors: Relationship Quality

Answer 8

• Happier couples more satisfied with sex.
• Feelings of love; Attachment security; Commitment.

Question 9

Good Sex Predictors: Actual Sex

Answer 9

Sexual satisfaction derived from:
- More frequent sex.
- Greater variety of sexual activity.
- Occurrence and consistency of orgasm (especially female).
- Communicating about sex (reciprocity in initiating, acceptance; disclosure.

Question 10

STUDY: Why Do People Have Sex?

Answer 10

• Each day, p’s indicated: Relationship well-being (feelings of closeness, satisfaction, conflict) and Sexual behaviour.
• Motives for sex: approach motives, avoidance motives.
• Found: When people had sex for approach-motivated reasons, they experienced more satisfaction, closeness, and less conflict; When they had sex for avoidance- motivated reasons, they experienced less satisfaction, closeness, and more conflict.

Question 11

Motivations for Sex: Approach Sexual Motives

Answer 11

Aimed toward obtaining positive outcomes.
- “To pursue my own sexual pleasure.”
- “To feel good about myself.”
- “To please my partner.”

Question 12

Motivations for Sex: Avoidance Sexual Motives

Answer 12

Aimed toward avoiding negative outcomes.
- “To avoid conflict in my relationship.”
- “To prevent my partner from becoming upset.”
- “To prevent my partner from losing interest in me.”

Question 13

Predictors of Hooking-Up

Answer 13

• More alcohol use.
• More previous hook up experience (particularly positive experiences).
• Less relationship awareness (e.g., “I usually weigh the pros and cons before allowing myself to take the next step in relationships.”)
• Religiosity.
• Gender (52% of women, 68% of men..).
• Loneliness.

Question 14

Consequences of Hooking-Up

Answer 14

Condom use
- Women who reported greater condom use reported fewer positive emotions and more negative emotions.
- Men’s condom use did not predict positive emotions, but associated with fewer negative emotions.
- Used condoms make women think their partner doesn’t want intimacy.
Alcohol
- More alcohol use associated with fewer positive and more negative emotions.

Question 15

STUDY: KRUGER ET AL., 2013; Infidelity: What is Cheating?

Answer 15

• Gave participants each of the 27 items and asked them to rate to what extent it constituted cheating.
• Most representative: penile-vaginal intercourse (m=97.7).
• Least representative: giving $ 5 to other person (m=8.1).

Question 16

STUDY: YARAB, SENSIBAUGH, AND ALLGEIER, 1998; What is Cheating Cont.

Answer 16

• Asked people to list as many behaviours as they could that might be considered “unfaithful” if they or their primary partner engaged in them in a dating relationship.
• Found: General agreement on what defines cheating. some ambiguity for less commonly sided behaviours.

Question 17

STUDY: DRIGOTAS, SAFSTROM, AND GENTILITY, 1999; How Many People Cheat?

Answer 17

• Study 1:14 men, 60 women, all exclusive
  daters; Completed infidelity questionnaire.
• 72% of people reported emotional infidelity; 48% reported physical infidelity.

Question 18

Prevalence of Infidelity: Good and Bad News

Answer 18

Bad News:
- Rates of cheating relatively high.
- Despite the fact that it’s hard to get accurate estimates due to self-report biases.
- People don’t want to admit, cheating.
- Also maybe differences in how one finds cheating.
Good News?
- No gender differences.
- The most extreme behaviours are at least common.

Question 19

STUDY: Cheating Among Married Couples; What Did They Find?

Answer 19

Cheating is less common among married
couples than dating couples.

Question 20

Predictors of Cheating: Three Factors

Answer 20

Demographic factors.
Interpersonal factors.
Personality factors.

Question 21

Demographic Factors of Cheating

Answer 21

• GENDER: Most commonly studied, men tend to report cheating more than women in early studies, but more recent studies show no differences.
• RELIGIOUSITY: Routinely found as predictor of infidelity, people report being more religious tend to cheat less.
• EDUCATION: Highly educated individuals more likely to report infidelity than less educated individuals.
• INCOME: Individuals with higher income, more prone to infidelity, likely have more opportunities to do so.

Question 22

Interpersonal Predictors of Cheating

Answer 22

• Relationship quality: Low marital satisfaction associated in many studies with infidelity.
• Commitment: Less committed people more likely to cheat. Because they are less satisfied have higher quality of alternatives and less investment.

Question 23

STUDY: BUSS AND SHACKELFORD, 1997; Who Is Most Likely To Cheat?

Answer 23

• 107 newlywed couples completed a number of personality measures for themselves and their partners.
• Asked to indicate how likely it was that they would engage in 6 types of cheating behaviour in the next year: Flirting, passionately kissing, date, etc.

Self predictors:
- Narcissism
- Conscientiousness (negative).
- Impulsivity low self-control.
Partner predictors:
- Partner, sexualizing others (commenting on others attractiveness).
- Partner is jealous and possessive.
- Partner withhold sex.
- Partner, abuses alcohol.
Contextual predictors:
- Marital dissatisfaction.
- Sexual dissatisfaction

Question 24

Cues for Physical Infidelity

Answer 24

• Physical evidence - e.g., partner contracts STI, partner smells like sex.
• Partner gets caught or admits it.
• Partner becomes uninterested in sex.
• Partner changes normal routine (clothes, diet, sleep).
• Partner displays more sexual interest than normal; acts overly affectionate.

Question 25

Cues for Emotional Infidelity

Answer 25

• Partner becomes dissatisfied/falls out of love.
• Partners, inconsiderate, and rejecting.
• Partner is angry and critical.
• Partner doesn’t want to spend time together.
• Partner doesn’t want to discuss another person.
• Partner acts guilty.

Question 26

STUDY: LAMBERT, MULDER, AND FINCH AM, 2014; Others Predictions of Cheating

Answer 26

• 51 Participants came into lab with partner asked to complete infidelity questionnaire,
  assessing physical and emotional intimacy with another person.
• One partner blindfolded and instructed by other partner about what to draw.
• This was videotaped.
• Coders than rated: how likely is it that this person has shown interest in someone other than partner? ETC.
• Found: Results showed a significant correlation between participants, actual infidelity and coder ratings!

Question 27

STUDY: HUGHES AND HARRISON 2017; Voice Cheating Test

Answer 27

• Researchers had 10 males and 10 females make a voice recording.
• Recruited 152 participants asked to listen to each of the voice samples and asked how likely it is that the person speaking has cheated on a romantic partner with whom they are in a exclusive committed relationship?
• Found: Participants were able to detect cheating based on vocal samples. Why? No idea. Female, participants, more likely to perceive cheating than male participants.

Question 28

STUDY: RHODES, MORLEY, AND SIMMONS 2012; Face Cheating Test

Answer 28

• Participant shown pictures of 189 faces.
• The face is in the data sent reported whether they a) had ever had sex with someone other than their partner and b) whether they ever had sex with someone already in a relationship.
• Among female participants: their own ratings of unfaithfulness showed small but significant correlations with faces’ own cheating behaviour.
• Among male participants: little evidence of accuracy. Men rated attractive and feminine women as more likely to cheat, but no evidence that this is the case.