Interpersonal Exam #1 Flashcards
models of communication
action
interaction
transaction
action model
message transfer one way linear model of communication 7 pieces -source -encoding -message -channel -decoding -receiver -noise examples -advertisements reading
interaction model
message exchange
two-way linear model
all the same elements of the action model, plus
-feedback (response to original message)
when the receiver receives the message, there is a pause
examples
-letters
transaction
message creation
same as the interaction model, except
-parts are continuous and simultaneous, not linear
you are always being influenced by the other person
interpersonal communication
dyadic communication
treat one another as unique individuals
impersonal vs interpersonal communication
conventional - unique
replaceable (they need a fill)- irreplaceable
-independent - interdependent
superficial - deep
myths of interpersonal communication
more words make things clearer (better)
meanings are in words
-meanings are in people
all communication seeks understanding
-ritualistic communication
relationship problems are communication problems
-most of the time we have problems because of incompatible goals
effective communication is a natural ability
fundamental principle of interpersonal communication
the quality of our interpersonal relationships stems from the quality of our communication with others
IP is
irreversible -you can't take it back unrepeatable -every context is different inevitable -one cannot not communicate intentional and unintentional -a yawn: unintentional -the response: I must be boring you (intentional) involves rules -implicit and explicit content and relationship elements -content: ideas and information, primarily verbal -relationship: primarily nonverbal, implied meaning, classifies the content contextual -cultural aspects: positive affect of Americans vs Paresians
example of content and relationship dimensions
receive an invitation to see a movie, say "I'm busy" verbal content -I'm busy nonverbal -don't want to hang out -genuinely sorry you can't go -don't want to see the movie
communication competence
defines as effective and appropriate
-effective: getting point across, received desired results
-appropriate: meeting the rules and expectations for that situation, enhances or maintains the relationship
there is no single “ideal” way to communicate
competence is situational
competence can be learned
characteristics of a competent communicator
nexting a large repertoire of skills adaptability empathy/perspective taking cognitive complexity self-monitoring
nexting
reality that we always have the ability to choose what we do or say next
call to personal responsibility
cognitive complexity
ability to look at a situation and come up with multiple possibilities for the cause
self-monitoring
ability to monitor own behavior
two types
-ability to monitor behavior while engaging
-little voice that acts before you speak
self-concept
a relatively stable set of perception that you hold about yourself
subjective
more descriptive (what)
self-esteem
evaluation of ones worth
reflected in our skills, talents, knowledge, and appearance
more evaluative
a large part of who we are is reflected in our
attitudes
beliefs
values
attitudes
positive or negative response
beliefs
conception about what is true and what is false
values
thoughts about what we think is good and what we think is bad
private vs public self
private: perceived
- how we see ourselves
public: presenting
material self
The total of all the tangible things you own
social self
reflected in interactions and relationships
spiritual self
A man’s inner or subjective being
His psychic faculties and dispositions
characteristics of self-concept
subjective
-high or low self-evaluations
flexible
resistant to chang
e-we tend to resist revising how we see others
-cognitive conservatism: we seek out information that confirms our existing self-concept
how self-concept develops
not born with a conscious self-concept interactions with others social comparison association with groups roles
interactions with others
reflected appraisal: looking glass self
shift changes at 12 from looking to parents to looking to peers
social comparison
reference group
-who the reference group is is important
superior/inferior or similar/different
how self-concept affects interpersonal relationships
decentering
self-fulfilling prophecy
interpretation of messages
decentering
ability to move beyond yourself as the frame of reference
-people with a high self-concept struggle with this
you need to be able to decenter in order to have empathy and see others’ viewpoints
self-fulfilling prophecy
you believe something about yourself and it comes true
interpretation of messages
narcissistic response to criticism
-other person is jealous
Schutz’s Interpersonal Needs Theory
people have three primary needs
- need for inclusion
- need for affection
- need for control
need for inclusion
our desire to belong and have significance
the most basic interpersonal need
three ways people address inclusion needs
-the under-social: low need for inclusion, “loner”
-the over-social: always want to be included
-the ideal social: comfortable being social or alone
need for affection
the need to feel and express love
the most intense of the interpersonal needs
three ways people address affection needs
-the under-personal: low need for affection, don’t expect much affection and tend to not give much
-the over-personal: desires a lot of love and affection from others
-the personal: feels comfortable giving and receiving love from some and not from others
need for control
we all have a desire to influence and be influenced; to respect others and be respected
three ways to address control needs
-abdicrat: low need for control, like to give power away to others
-autocrat: high need for control
-democrat: feels comfortable with power but also feels comfortable giving power away
where are these needs met?
relationships
changing self-concept
have realistic expectations have a realistic perception of yourself have the will to change have the skill to change have a sense of humor (about yourself) service -when we serve others, our self-concept goes up
perception
experiencing the world and making sense out of what we experience
interpersonal perception
taking the process of perception and applying it to people
we try and figure out what people are like and we try to give meaning to their actions
our perceptions aren’t necessarily objective facts
the stages of the perception process
selecting
organizing
interpreting
selecting
picking a certain piece of information and focusing on it
why do we see certain cues over others
easiest personal relevance -name -interest familiar distinctive repetitive
organizing
we put information into an efficient pattern to make sense out of it
punctuation
closure
stereotyping
constructs for organizing information
physical
role
interaction
psychological
punctuation
determining the causes and effects in a series of interactions
- wife demands –> husband avoids –> repeat
- -who is the cause
stereotyping
we place someone in a rigid category
interpret all their behavior from that category
problem
-undervalues our individual differences/what makes us unique
closure
occurs when we fill in missing information
circle vs. dashes in the form of a circle
we do this with people
-they look and act and sound like someone we know
-we assume they have a lot of similar qualities as the person we know
influences on perception
-standpoint theory
BOOK
where do specific interpretations come from
degree of involvement -tend to view people more favorably with a higher degree of involvement relational satisfaction past experience knowledge of others
impressions
collection of perceptions we place people into one of two categories -people we like -people we do not like occurs in 90 seconds to 4 minutes
Impression Formation Theory
tells us where the information comes from that we use to form perceptions of others
3 sources
-what the person tells us
-others’ appearance/behaviors
-what 3rd parties tell us
–30% of others’ perception is from 3rd parties
Crude Law of Relationship Impressions
positive impressions are hard to acquire but easy to lose
negative impressions are easy to acquire but hard to lose
primacy effect
we tend to give more weight to the first piece of information we receive about another person
recency effect
we tend to give more weight to the last piece of information we receive about another person
halo effect
occurs when we learn positive information/qualities of another person
we assume the person has other positive qualities/characteristics that we don’t know about
horn effect
occurs when we learn negative information/qualities of another person
we assume the person has other negative qualities/characteristics that we don’t know about
impression management
occurs when we make guesses about how others are going to interpret our behavior and then we act in such a way to form the impression that we want
how to form the best “first impression” using nonverbal behaviors
physical appearance positive affect cues (warmth, kindness) -voice -smiling immediacy cues (signal interest) -eye contact -nodding -back-channeling -direct body orientation (shoulders square to other person)
causal attribution theory
giving a cause to someone’s behavior
internal/external
-internal: deals with the qualities/characteristics of the person
-external: situational cause
differences in attributions between happy and unhappy couples
happy couples make external attributions in negative situations
happy couples make internal attributions in positive situations
biases in the attribution process
objectivity bias
actor-observer bias
self-serving bias
objectivity bias
we treat our attributions as objective facts
we act upon them as if they are true
actor-observer bias
tendency to explain someone else’s negative behavior as being due to internal characteristics
our negative behavior is due to external circumstances
self-serving bias
we take credit for positive outcomes
we distance ourselves from negative outcomes
barriers to accurate perceptions
ignoring information
oversimplifying
stereotyping
imposing consistency
-overestimate consistency of self and others
focusing on the negative
-we give more weight to negative information
improving perception skills
know yourself (know the types of perceptions I generally make
consider the context
become other-oriented
check your perception
direct vs. indirect perception checking
direct
-directly ask the person
indirect
-looking for additional information from external sources (other person, context) to see if your perception is accurate
direct perception checking
avoid defensearousing accusations
-“why are you mad”
-it assumes that we know what the answer is
complete direct perception check includes
-a description of the behavior you noticed
-two possible interpretations of the behavior (shows you haven’t come to a conclusion already)
-a request for clarification about how to interpret the behavior
building empathy
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