hurried child Flashcards
5 stages of burnout
- honeymoon stage- starts to an individual starting something new and looking forward in a positive manner to what is in store
- fuel shortage stage-multiple demands on a child to learn new things in a less supportive environment, when fuel shortage sets in= dissatisfaction, fatigue, poor wok habits, bad/ rude behaviour sets in
- chronic symptom stage- stress takes a toll on the child and their health deteriorates
- crisis stage-previous symptoms are indicators signaling a serious problem, it is a copout stage where the child finds a way not to have to face and uncomfortable situation
- hitting the wall (check out) stage- the individual is too physically and mentally spent to go any further, they may try to run away or even commit suicide
pressures hurrying parents
- they themselves feel hurried
1. paid work and concerns around wages as they try to provide for their family
2. having to “keep up with the joneses”, conspicuous consumer consumption
3. mobility. in western society the ultimate goal is to achieve upward mobility
4. we find a demand on our time increasing as multiple roles have attached them to multiple responsibilities
5. we do everything while being constantly aware of the personal and professional uncertainties we might be laid off, encounter a separation/ divorce etc.
functional/ dysfunctional families
- dysfunction can range from not managing your child’s daily intake of fruits and veggies to abusing them verbally/ physically
- in western society 10-15% are functional and 85-90% have some degree of dysfunction
the daycare parents
- the accommodators
- the adversaries
- the allies
- the acrobats
the daycare parents: accommodators
-this family survives strains and conflicts because one spouse is more accommodating than the other, takes dedicated responsibility for the child (usually the mother), the parent here is most accountable and reliable towards the caregiving process, the child is their priority
the daycare parents: adversaries
-these parents run into conflict because each has a high career aspiration and feels their partner is not contributing adequately in regard to private sector responsibilities, these parents respond in a way that the child may be seen as a burden, this child is at risk for serious hurrying because the parents own lives are the priority
the daycare parents: allies
-cover for and run into interference for one another
the daycare parents: acrobats
- type of people who want everything and want it now
- have not sorted out their priorities and are like loose canons
- unreliable and unpredictable
ways in which we hurry children
- pseudosophistication
- imaginary audience
- achievement overload
- school hurrying children
- free floating anxiety
pseudosophistication
- recognizes when children know much more than they understand
- they are exposed to a lot of information largely acquired by the media and are hit with an information overload
- it is also recognized on the materialism basis branding that children are knowledgeable about
imaginary audience
- when children think about their own and other peoples thinking
- alkin says children tend to make an error and confuse what theyre thinking about with what other people are thinking about
- young people think that other people are as concerned with their appearance, feelings and thoughts just as much as they are- this shows the imaginary audience that others are as concerned with us as we are
achievement overload
- relates to hurrying
- alkin says parents seem over concerned about childrens academic, interpersonal and extracurricular achievements
- research shows that it is more middle-class families that achievement overload their children, they are hoping that their children will achieve what they failed to master themselves
school hurrying
- children are being pressured to do well for the sake of the teachers and administrators as the gov’t/ provinces test the scores of the students in subjects to see how well the institutions are educating the next generation
- Elkin says there are 3 important ingredients in the school setting: teacher, student and length of time they send together
free floating anxiety
- is seen in children whose parent shave just separated or divorced
- not knowing what to be afraid of is what produces it but feels restless, irritable and unable to concentrate
- it is also seen when the child is put into a situation of success that the parent want for them to achieve (when the child is a symbol of social status for parents)
tragedy of the lost self
- when boundaries are overstepped, children who are hurried in this manner experience the tragedy of the lost self
- the child does not know who they are/ who they should be
- confusion to the definition of self
- when adult fails to recognize the child way of seeing, thinking, feeling and substitute their own, they have taken the childs voice and hurried them in the development of their identity
