Exam Two Flashcards
Two assertions for this section of the course
the who i am question we see to avoid answering by being in a relationship are the questions we answer bc we are in a relationship
the who i am question is threatening and so tend to focus on the other member of the dyad by asking who are they and why do they act that way
4 themes for the section of the course
interdependent tension (response interference) is a human universal interdependent tension (unresolved) is an opportunity to clarify the relationship Managed interdependent tension forces us to examine and clarify the sources of response interference unmanaged interdependent tension can cause us to seek simple answers
what does it mean for interdependent tension to be universal
it exists across time
what causes us to face the “who am i” question
interdependent tension
what is the takeaway from the movie Castaway
we are social by nature
Baumeister and Leary
we have a need for belonging
what does the need of belonging require of us
that we have a few people with whom we have frequent and mostly positive interactions
what must we believe in order to feel like we belong
that one or more of our interaction partners will be in contact with us overtime with real emotional concern for us
what is critical to our social interactions
self definition
what about self definition makes relationships more difficult to manage
confronting our true self is hard for us
to have any chance of developing a healthy relationship
we must develop an authentic self knowledge
authentic self knowledge means
we are honest with ourselves about our strengths and limitations
what does authentic self knowledge require with our partners
to be honest with them and reveal our true strengths and weaknesses
to be vulnerable to sharp teeth
how is a relationship like being in a dance
coordinated and linked behavior
what to do first and second in a relationship
learn and ackowledge your own tendencies
learn the other persons tendencies
to be in a healthy relationship
you must know yourself first
what pushes us towards authentic self knowledge
interdependent tension
what is critical to the success of our social interactions
self definition
three things in understanding the role of the self in social interaction
social psychologists have tried to determine what are the most useful ways about thinking about the self
we tried to study how knowledge of the self develops
we tried to determine what situations and circumstances the self influences behavior
Useful ways of thinking about the self
self concept self esteem self schemata self presentation possible selves
self esteem
you know what it is about you but do you like it
self presentation
strategies for presenting ourselves in our social interactions
possible selves
who will i be?
how does knowledge of the self develop
through social interactions
reflected appraisals
we see ourselves reflected in the way people react to us and the things we do
how do we get to know who we truly are
in healthy relationships
why do healthy relationships teach us who we are
it is only in encountering response interferences that we are forced to look beyond our ideal self to our real self
unrealistic sense of self
someone making you feel you have someone wrong
two general ways of thinking about the self that is useful
the self as the knower
the self as the known
the self as the knower
the I
the process of actively experiencing a moment or event
also gives us a sense of continuity of experience overtime
the self as known
the me
the self we experience when we become the object of our own observation
Epstein says
the self is a theory that the individual has unwillingly constructed about themselves
why do we pay attention to self esteen
it is an internal psychological monitor of something that is important to us
being social equals
belongingness
the self esteem system
designed to monitor and respond to other peoples responses to us
when do we become objectively self aware
when the me is activated
the theory of objective self awareness
a state of consciousness where are attention is focused exclusively on the self
what does objective self awareness cause us to see within ourselves
the discrepancies between our real and ideal self
why are we forced to look outward in self awareness
to avoid the pain of seeing our real self
two reasons why psychological inconsistency is important
cognitive economic motivation
nature of attitudes
cognitive economic system
made up of cognitive processes that serve to reduce and simplify that vast info that floods pepoles lives
the purpose of simplifying
to finish efficient processes and not get overwhelmed
cognitive shortcuts
the self
beuristics
nature of attitudes
a predisposition to evaluate some objects positively or negatively
any attitude has three components
cognition
affect
conation
cognition
thikning-what you know
affect
feeling/emotional
conation
behavioral
conation
behavioral
cognitive consistency theory
we are motivated to keeo the components of an attitude consistent with each other
cognitive dissonance theory
we experience dissonance when we are aware that we have at least two cognitions that are inconsisten
the greater the dissonance you experience
the greater the pressure to relieve it
cognitive elements
these are the things a person knows or believes about the world
cognitive
how cognitive elements exist in relation to each other
inconsistency causes
us to engage in person perception
person perception
the act of a perceiver encountering another person and forming impressions of and possible making attribution about the other person
attributional analysis
how we give meaning to social instances and circumstances
two possible ways of making attributions
environmental enducement
personal force
three stages in making an attribution
observation of an action
judgement of intention
dispositional attribution
what are we trying to figure out with attribution
the other persons dispositions
attributional fire
a set of hot emotions that results when two people make negative internal dispositional attributional about each other
in our relationships we have two goals
to predict how that other person will bhevae
to gauge whether that persons attitude toward the relationship matches ours
two cognitive bias that keep us from seeing the truth in the ones we love
the fundamental attribution error
the actor observes difference
the fundamental attribution error
the tendency to discount situational causes and emphasize dispositional causes as influences on another persons behavior
the actor observer diference
the tendency to explain our own behavior as an actor in situational terms and the behavior of our partner, whom we observe in dispositional terms
kellys covariation model
distinctiveness
consistency
consensus
6 steps towards management of response interference
-agree on time to talk
-admit your tendencies
-listen to strengths and limitations
-be reasonable
-work toward agreeable behavioral strategies
not all dyads are supposed to last
self schemas
represent peoples beliefs and feelings about themselves
working self concept
the idea that only a subset of a persons vast pool of self knowledge is brought to mind in a given context
social comparison theory
people seek out information about themselves through comparison with other people
sociometer hypothesis
readout of our standing amongst others
better than average effect
most people believe they are above average
