Exam II Review Flashcards
Define gender
The sex that one most closely identifies with
Define sex
The biological characteristics of male or female
Define sexual orientation
Romantic or sexual partners of choice
Sexual scripts
Norms rules and guidelines regarding sexual behavior
Newly married couples’ sexual frequency was about ______ times weekly, but after the first year this number dropped to about _______ times per week.
3, 1-2
Marital infidelity
Romantic or sexual relationship with someone outside of a marriage
Four horsemen
Criticism
Contempt
Defensiveness
Withdrawal
Types of conflict
Pseudo conflict
Content conflict
Value conflict
Ego conflict
Theories of power and empirical support
Resource theory
Principle of least theory
Relative love and need theory
Doing gender
Where do Arranged marriages occur?
South Asia, India, Egypt, China
Coontz’s Myths about Marriage (3)
People don’t value marriage the same way we used to
Married women who work put in second shift at home
Married couples are building blocks of community life
2 Perspectives on marriage today
Marital decline: institution of marriage is being threatened by individualistic needs and pursuit of personal happiness
Marital resilience: marriages today aren’t any weaker than in the past; real threat is social problems we face
Marriage rates in US
How many adults in US at any given time are married?
What percentage of Americans support same sex marriage?
Just over 1/2
Just over 1/2
The marriage premium
Psychological, physical and economic well being that Married people have
Marital satisfaction over time
Pattern?
Reasons for decline
Inverted j over a lifetime
Time effect, more realistic expectations, hassles of daily life and children
Intersexed
Anyone born with non standard sexual anatomy
Transgender
Person feels just as comfortable or more so in expressing gender traits associated with the other biological sex
Transsexual
Person feels there is a mismatch between self concept and anatomy may have sexual reassignment surgery
How are sexual scripts learned?
Media
Parents
Partners
What are some more contemporary sexual scripts?
Both partners involved and honest, both willing to hear other partners needs
What percent of all couples reported satisfaction with their sexual relationships?
90%
Does sexual satisfaction differ with sexual frequency? How?
Yes. Sexual satisfaction is more associated with the quality of communication rather than the frequency
Types of marital infidelity
Conflict avoiders Intimacy avoiders Sexual addiction Split self affairs Exit affairs
Conflict avoiders
Difficult time working through conflict
Intimacy avoiders
Have trouble getting close to one another
Sexual addiction
Using sexual behavior to numb inner pain
Split self affair
Being somewhat satisfied but feel like own emotional needs have not been satisfied; deciding between two relationships
Exit affair
Using affair as a way to get out whenever one foot is already out the door in the relationship
Open marriage
Consensual affairs between other people are allowed
What percentage of men and women will engage in infidelity at one point in a marriage?
25% of men
15% of women
In a given year, what percentage of men and women will engage in infidelity?
12% of men
7% of women
Where are we seeing trends in infidelity?
Adults over age 60 and under age 35 seem to have increasing rates of infidelity
Avg age for men to have affairs
55
Average age for women to have affairs
45
What percentage of couples split after infidelity occurs?
70%
Divorce proneness
Thinking about possibility of divorce
Does low marital satisfaction put couples at risk for infidelity?
Not necessarily
Who is more likely to feel guilty about an affair?
Women
What percentage of teens actually use privacy?
50%
A 2005 UK study on adolescence found that ___% reported they had been bullied or threatened via electronic communication, and
____% reported being the bully
20%, 11%
Adolescence are how much more likely to be bullied online if they are bullied at school?
7x more likely
Gottman’s styles of marital interaction
Regulators: validating, volatile and conflict avoidant
Non regulators: hostile and detached
What did Gottman find as a predictor of a poor quality marriage?
How we work through conflict and resolve it rather than conflict frequency
Characteristics and risks of validating couples
Let partner know their opinion is valid in disagreements
Use linguistic cues and mirror expressions
Compromise together
Tend to be good friends, like being around each other
Hold more typical gender roles
Risks: sometimes passion and independence can be sacrificed when too focus on the relationship
Characteristics/risks of volatile couples
Fight on grand scale but have a grand time making up afterwards
Very open about feelings
High level of emotional engagement
Lots of interrupting
More laughter
See themselves as equal
risks- so much fighting can end the relationship feelings may get hurt; may escalate to violence
Gottman’s magic ratio
5:1
Show interest, respect, empathy, affection, appreciation, humor, love, and care
Finding a partner freedom vs constraint
Can I really marry anyone I want? Social pressure influences mate choice
Marriage squeeze
After WWII men had more women to choose from than women did men
Marriage gradient
Informal norms based on power differentials; women engrossed to marry up while men encouraged to marry down
Choosing a partner: personal qualities, what do men and women favor here?
Physical attractiveness, mutual attraction, dependable character, emotional stability, maturity
men favor good looks, women favor economic potential
Traditional perspectives of arranged marriages
Love matches and arranged
What differences were found in the study on arranged couples vs love matched couples?
None
Marriage in colonial America
Native Americans
Blacks
Whites
NA: nuclear, extended, kinship networks
blacks: declined marriage, more split up due to slavery
Whites: patriarchal, everyone worked hard to provide
Marriage in 19th century
Native Americans
Blacks
Whites
NA: trail of tears in 1830s, 1/4 died
Blacks: marrying rights from 13th amendment
Whites: emergence of traditional family form, children treated more like children, education and leisure
Marriage during 20th century, after industrial revolution
Whites
Blacks
60-70% of white families had traditional form
Baby boomers
Blacks: redlining, declined access, limited in wealth
Endogamy vs exogamy
Marrying within one’s group
Marrying outside one’s group
People don’t value marriage the way they used to
Argues that modern Americans put less of an emphasis on marriage organizing every part of our lives, but that we put more value on it as a relationship based on fairness
Poll: how many Americans thought divorce was wrong, and how many thought affairs were wrong?
1/4 divorce is wrong
92% affairs are wrong
Choosing not to parent
What percentage of women?
20%
Adoption types
Closed or open Public or private Independent National International
Belsky and cox study patterns of change
Marital satisfaction in parenthood
Couples satisfaction declines across transition to parenthood, certain types of couples changed in different ways
Belsky and cox study problems
Division of labor Money Relationship difficulties and sex frequency drop Career and work Social life
Married women put in second shift at home
Argues that the second shift doesn’t equal 9 hours and can be misleading; we find that men and women work about the same however men are paid for theirs and women are not
Married couples are building blocks of community life
Married parents spend more time with children than they did in the 60s; people who are more engaged in extended family are more often I married and married couples spend less Time giving back to community
Decision to not have children
Is a process that occurs across childbearing years and is considered multiple times
What did the McQuillan study on childless women find?
Found that women who were most concerned with being childless were those who said they had the least control over getting pregnant and placed higher importance on motherhood
Belsky and Cox study
Decliners and improvers
Decliners tended to report less love and communication and more conflict in relationship
Improvers was a subgroup that reported greater marital satisfaction, higher love and commitment and less conflict
How much did sex frequency drop during first year of parenthood?
Social life?
30-40%
40%
Belsky and Cox characteristics of successful couples
Expectations Gender ideologies Team vs self focus Conflict management Emotionality
