How does Communication work?
Information input from messenger/sender–> message is decoded—-> Behaviour/output/ response from reciepient
What is the communication triad?
Biology-how, ears/eyes/brain, the receiving
Psychology- who, personality/mental health/feelings/emotions, the intepretation
Sociology- when and where, social experience/culture/social media/ family friends school church
7 modes of communication?
- person to person
- meetings
- paper
- internet
- phones
- mobile phones
- hand writing
Tips to communicating? (6)
- consider goal of communicating
- make sure goal is understood
- communicating is hard work
- communication takes patientce
- involves interpretation
- listening to understand is harder than being understood
Percentages of Listening
55% is how you look
38% is how you sound
7% is the words you say
93% of message is non words (55+38)
Superficial level
Non-listening
- blank face, fading out, staring,
- saying “I see, uh huh sure”
- nodding, looking at watch
- thinking about other things
Obvious level
Listening for rejection
- seems like listening
- process information to respond
- formulate thoughts before finished
- reject-“that won’t work, but; can’t”
- sometimes talk over or debate
Insight Level
Listening for understanding
- seek ti understand the other
- seek deeper meaning
- active listening: empathy, questions, reframing, summarizing
- “it sounds like; I hear you say”
Types of non-verbal communication (7)
- facial expressions,
- gestures
- paralinguistics
- haptics
- Body language
- appearance
- eye contact/glaze
Non verbal messages can
- repeat
- contradict
- complement (Add to)
- replace
- accent (emphasize)
Closed question
- require short factual one concept answers
- yes or no
- seeks understanding of basic information
open question
- what, how, why
- seeks knowledge, ideas, opinions, feelings,
- opens, explores, looks for detail
why questions
- defensive
- close down
How does silence strengthen communication (5)
- to pause
- to support
- to show respect
- to slow down pace and intensity
- to control one self and emotions
How does silence negatively affect communication
- to shut down convo
- to ice out/bully
- to ignore
- to avoid responsibility
SET Principle
Support-statement of support or acknowledgement
Empathy- statement of person’s feelings
Truth- statement of fact or reality
Assertiveness
Standing up for yourself without putting others down. Stating what you want and why.
3 Types of Assertiveness
Aggressive (shark)- i am right, power over, dominance
Passive (Turtle) Give in, give up, silent, I lose
Passive-Aggressive (snake) passive first, then aggressive
5 Conflict styles
Turtle (avoiding) Teddy Bear (accomodating) Fox (compromising) Owl (colloborating) Shark (competing)
Position
what someone wants, represents their solution or perspective
interest
the underlying concern or need driving the position, the why
Democratic
- team guided by one leader but all individual involved in decision making
- uses consensus and group decision making
- leader has final say
- inclusive, interested and sharing
authoritarian
- one leader or boss
- leader dictates all policies and procedures
- lacks participation from subordinates
- directive, controlling, bossy
Task-oriented
- only focus on getting task done
- not worried about people, end product is important
- focused, clear, organized, goal focused
