Chapter 9

Question 1

What is an example of a thought we struggle to control?

Answer 1

The phrase “Try not to think about white bears” illustrates how prohibition often leads us to think about the very thing we are trying to avoid.

Question 2

Why is it difficult to control our thoughts?

Answer 2

Prohibiting certain thoughts tends to backfire, as this attempt at control can make those thoughts more persistent and intrusive.

Question 3

What do recent studies indicate about “I won’t” power?

Answer 3

Research in anxiety, depression, dieting, and addiction shows that applying “I won’t” power to inner thoughts and feelings often fails.

Question 4

What is suggested about self-control in the context of our thoughts?

Answer 4

We need a new definition of self-control that allows for the acceptance and letting go of control over our inner thoughts and emotions.

Question 5

Why does attempting to eliminate a thought or emotion often trigger a rebound effect?

Answer 5

Wegner suggests this happens because the brain splits the task into two parts: directing attention away from the forbidden thought and monitoring for any signs of that thought.

Question 6

What roles do the “operator” and the “monitor” play in managing thoughts?

Answer 6

The operator focuses on steering attention away from the forbidden thought, requiring mental effort, while the monitor automatically looks for evidence of the unwanted thought or feeling without much effort.

Question 7

How does the monitor function in relation to the operator?

Answer 7

The monitor runs as part of the brain’s automatic threat-detection system and becomes critical for cooperation with the operator. If the operator’s resources are low, the monitor can lead to self-control issues.

Question 8

What happens when the operator runs out of mental resources?

Answer 8

If the operator becomes fatigued or mentally drained, the monitor continues to function, often intensifying focus on the forbidden thoughts and leading to potential impulsive behavior.

Question 9

Provide an example of how the operator and monitor work together.

Answer 9

At the grocery store, the operator plans to avoid the snack aisle, while the monitor scans for tempting foods like cookies, constantly alerting the operator to possible threats.

Question 10

What can reduce the effectiveness of the operator?

Answer 10

Factors like distractions, fatigue, stress, or alcohol can tax mental resources, making it harder for the operator to function effectively and increasing the likelihood of giving in to temptations.

Question 11

What happens when you try not to think about something?

Answer 11

Trying to suppress a thought often guarantees that it remains prominent in your mind, leading to increased preoccupation with that thought.

Question 12

What underlying assumption do we make when a thought keeps resurfacing?

Answer 12

We may assume that the recurring thought must be true or important because it keeps coming back to our minds.

Question 13

What unsettling effects can occur when we push away worries or desires?

Answer 13

The more we try to suppress fears or cravings, the more convincing and compelling they become, reinforcing their presence in our thoughts.

Question 14

How does the experience of craving work when trying to avoid a particular thought?

Answer 14

If you crave something like ice cream and try to push the thought away, it can return with greater authority, making it seem even more significant, and leading to indulgence.

Question 15

What self-reflective question should we consider regarding our thoughts?

Answer 15

Ask yourself if there is something you try to keep out of your mind, and examine whether suppression is effective or if it makes the thought return stronger (ironically rebounding).

Question 16

What is the “monitor’s” role in the context of thought suppression?

Answer 16

The monitor also checks the effectiveness of your suppression efforts, indicating that you might need to be aware of how you’re managing your thoughts and feelings about suppression.

Question 17

What is Wegner’s suggested antidote to the dilemma of ironic rebound?

Answer 17

Wegner suggests that the ironic solution is to give up trying to control unwanted thoughts and emotions, which helps reduce their control over you

Question 18

What happens when participants are allowed to express suppressed thoughts?

Answer 18

Studies show that giving participants permission to express a suppressed thought makes that thought less likely to intrude on their conscious awareness.

Question 19

What is the paradoxical effect of allowing yourself to think a thought?

Answer 19

Paradoxically, permitting yourself to think about a thought reduces the likelihood that you will think it, helping to alleviate the pressure of suppression.

Question 20

Can attempting to suppress sad thoughts lead to depression?

Answer 20

Yes, studies show that trying to suppress negative thoughts increases the likelihood of becoming depressed.

Question 21

What is a more effective approach to dealing with negative thoughts?

Answer 21

Instead of pushing them away, we need to make peace with negative thoughts to avoid mental suffering.

Question 22

What do people with social anxiety disorder experience constantly?

Answer 22

They live with a constant fear of embarrassing themselves or being judged by others and often act as their own worst critics.

Question 23

What is the goal for individuals with social anxiety regarding their thoughts and feelings?

Answer 23

The goal is not to eliminate anxiety and self-doubt, but to develop trust in their ability to handle difficult thoughts and feelings.

Question 24

What is the mantra for the willpower experiment regarding thoughts and feelings?

Answer 24

“Feel what you feel, but don’t believe everything you think” encourages accepting thoughts without necessarily believing in their content.

Question 25

What technique does Goldin teach for handling upsetting thoughts?

Answer 25

Instead of distracting yourself, notice the upsetting thought, and stay focused on the feeling of your breath, allowing the thought to be present without judgment.

Question 26

How does accepting thoughts differ from thought suppression?

Answer 26

Accepting thoughts involves acknowledging their presence without believing in their content, while thought suppression attempts to push them away.

Question 27

What should you remind yourself when an upsetting thought arises?

Answer 27

You can acknowledge the thought by saying, “Oh well, there’s that thought again—worries happen. It doesn’t necessarily mean anything.”

Question 28

What is a common consequence of trying to avoid unwanted feelings?

Answer 28

Avoiding unwanted feelings often leads to self-destructive behavior, such as procrastination or excessive drinking to escape emotions.

Question 29

What should you reflect on regarding feelings in your willpower challenge?

Answer 29

Identify any feelings you are trying to avoid. Consider what might happen if you allowed yourself to feel those emotions instead.

Question 30

How can you give yourself permission to feel unwanted emotions?

Answer 30

Use techniques like focusing on your breath and visualizing the feelings as clouds, allowing them to pass without judgment.

Question 31

What is the process of ironic rebound in the context of self-sabotage?

Answer 31

Ironic rebound refers to the phenomenon where attempts to suppress thoughts or feelings lead to the opposite effect, often resulting in self-sabotaging behavior.

Question 32

Who is most vulnerable to the effects of thought suppression?

Answer 32

People who use thought suppression as a defense strategy against temptation are often the most vulnerable to its unwanted effects.

Question 33

What did a 2010 survey reveal about dieters and thought suppression?

Answer 33

The survey found that dieters are significantly more likely than nondieters to suppress thoughts about food, leading to decreased control around food.

Question 34

What consequences do dieters face when they suppress thoughts about food?

Answer 34

Dieters who suppress food-related thoughts experience more intense cravings and are more likely to binge-eat compared to those who do not attempt to control their thoughts.

Question 35

What happens when you try to avoid a specific food?

Answer 35

The more you attempt to avoid a food, the more your mind becomes preoccupied with it, often increasing your desire for it.

Question 36

What does science suggest about outlawing certain foods?

Answer 36

Research indicates that outlawing a food can actually increase desire for it, making it more tempting.

Question 37

Have you ever removed a food group or favorite snack in an attempt to lose weight?

Answer 37

Consider your personal experience: How long did you maintain that restriction, and how did it ultimately end?

Question 38

Is there currently anything on your do-not-eat list?

Answer 38

Reflect on any foods you’ve prohibited: How has outlawing them affected your cravings for those foods?

Question 39

If you don’t diet, are there other things you’re prohibiting in your life?

Answer 39

Examine whether prohibiting certain behaviors or items has diminished your desire for them or, conversely, increased it.

Question 40

What should we do with our thoughts and cravings instead of pushing them away?

Answer 40

We should embrace our thoughts and cravings, allowing them to come to us while recognizing that we don’t have to act on them

Question 41

What is the first step in the “Accept Those Cravings” willpower experiment?

Answer 41

Notice when you are thinking about your temptation or feeling a craving.

Question 42

What is the second step in managing cravings?

Answer 42

2. Accept the thought or feeling without trying to distract yourself or argue with it; keep in mind the white-bear rebound effect.

Question 43

What does it mean to step back from your cravings?

Answer 43

3. Recognize that while thoughts and feelings aren’t always under your control, you can choose whether to act on them.

Question 44

What should you do in the final step of managing cravings?

Answer 44

Remember your goal; remind yourself of your commitments, just as students reminded themselves not to eat the Hershey’s Kisses.

Question 45

How can you transform an “I won’t” power challenge into an “I will” power challenge?

Answer 45

Instead of fighting against appetites, reframe the challenge as a mission to pursue positive behaviors related to health.

Question 46

What is the first step in turning “I won’t” into “I will”?

Answer 46

Identify what you could do instead of the “I won’t” behavior that meets the same needs (e.g., stress relief or fun) by replacing it with a healthier habit

Question 47

What is an example of substituting a bad habit with a healthier one?

Answer 47

A student quitting coffee switched to tea, which provided similar benefits like a break, energy boost, and easy accessibility but with less caffeine.

Question 48

What should you consider if you’re trying to quit a bad habit?

Answer 48

Think about what you could be doing instead of engaging in the habit. Focusing on the missed opportunities can motivate you to change.

Question 49

How did one student redefine their experience with television?

Answer 49

A student who felt she wasted time on reality TV set a goal to use that time for cooking, initially substituting cooking shows for her regular shows.

Question 50

How can you redefine a negative habit?

Answer 50

Transform “not being late” to “arriving five minutes early” or “being the first person there,” which can increase motivation and reduce lateness.

Question 51

What is the overall goal of this willpower experiment?

Answer 51

Spend the week focusing on positive actions rather than prohibitions and evaluate how well you did with both the original “I won’t” challenge and the new “I will” challenge.

Question 52

What does “surfing the urge” involve?

Answer 52

“Surfing the urge” means paying attention to the urge (e.g., to smoke) without trying to change or suppress it, recognizing that urges eventually pass.

Question 53

How can urges be visualized during the “surfing the urge” practice?

Answer 53

Urges can be imagined as waves in the ocean that build in intensity and eventually crash and dissolve.

Question 54

What is one of the benefits of learning to surf the urge?

Answer 54

You learn to accept and manage difficult inner experiences, reducing the need to seek unhealthy rewards for comfort.

Question 55

How does surfing the urge affect the risk of relapse under stress?

Answer 55

For those who practice surfing the urge, stress no longer increases the risk of relapse, as they develop better coping strategies.

Question 56

What steps should you follow when practicing the “surf the urge” technique?

Answer 56

Pause and sense your body when the urge arises.

Identify the sensations associated with the urge (e.g., tension, heart rate).

Stay with these sensations for at least one minute without acting on them.

Question 57

What can happen when you don’t act on an urge?

Answer 57

Not acting on an urge may increase its intensity temporarily, similar to an attention-seeking child throwing a tantrum.

Question 58

How should you approach initial attempts at surfing the urge?

Answer 58

Recognize that early attempts may still result in giving in; view these as part of the learning process, as surfing the urge is a skill that develops over time.

Question 59

Can the “surfing the urge” technique be applied beyond addiction?

Answer 59

Yes, surfing the urge can help handle any destructive impulse, not just those related to addiction.