chapter 4 working with others Flashcards
Explain what is meant by active listening ?
- Giving FULL ATTENTION to the speaker
- Checking that you understood.
- Not doing anything else
List the various reasons of active listening ?
Hint: 4x
- avoid MISUNDERSTANDING.
- BUILD relationships .
- ENCOURAGE people to say more and frank(honest).
- enable people to become CLEARER, by allowing them to gather their thoughts.
Discuss any five important guidelines for active listening ?
hint: AAA PE
- Give full ATTENTION.
- PARAPHRASE, to ensure understanding
- ASK, if you do not understand .
- ACKNOWLEDGE the other persons feelings .
- ENCOURAGE if the other person appears uncertain .
- Do not react or respond until the other person has finished speaking.
Define Assertiveness
1) standing-up for yourself,
2) respect the rights of others.
Outline the elements of scripting an assertive response
- PREPARE: Know what you want and approach in a positive way.
- SHARE your opinion on the problem. explain how you feel and what you want.
- RESPECT: active listening and try to understand how they feel
Briefly explain the four main tactics that should help win-win ‘negotiation’?
- Separate the people from the problem
- Focus on interests(الإهتمامات) not positions
- Generate options for mutual gain
- Agree on criteria for the solutions
EG. in a store trying to buy something
Briefly explain positive behaviour?
- Test understanding and summaries: Check that everyone understands the things in the same way and clarify the structure of any agreement, helps build relationships.
- Flag or Signal :Tell people what sort of behaviour you are going to use next, for example ‘could i ask you …‘followed by the question.
- Ask lots of questions:Helps you to identify other options to create a win-win situation and gives a deeper understanding of the other parties.
- Explain how they feel:Openness helps in creating trust and enhances relationship.
- Review their performance:reflection helps in identifying strengths and weaknesses of our approach.
If your negotiation seems to be failing because someone else is being difficult .How can you deal with such difficulty?
- Do not react: Deal with your behaviour, not opponents. Keep focused on the desired outcomes and concentrate on securing agreement.
- Look at the situation from the other person’s view point: It is harder for a person to be hostile if you are listening to them and acknowledging what they say and feel.
- Do not reject reframe
- make it easy to say yes .
- make it hard to say no.
context where assertiveness is useful?
- Stating your own views(opinion-رأي).
- Disagreeing with others’ views.
- Making a request.
- Refusing a request.
- Give/respond criticism(ينتقد ملاحظة ).
- Giving/respond praise.
Limits to assertiveness?
Examples
usually one-to-one
- Assertiveness may not be universally appropriate (مناسب).
1. Position differences: Cannot be done with everyone in some organizations
eg. (yes:peer to peer, NO:clerk to manager)
2. Powerful groups may MISUNDERSTAND assertion as aggressive.
eg. (Gender, Ethnicity, Disability).
3. Do not be assertive for things outside your control
4. Assertiveness can ignore collective work group goal .
5. is valued in some cultures but not all
Briefly explain negative behaviour?
hint: abcd I
- Irritator words and phrases
- Defense/attack spirals
- Argument dilution
- Behavior chains
- Counter proposals
In communication between two people, what is the role of each person?
One speaks
one listens
What is not active listening
Listening without concentration
Whole-hearted attention meaning?
Full concentration
Can you talk and listen at the same time?
No
What do you need for good communication
Active listening
Who is a “listener”?
The person that listens
Who is a speaker?
The person that talks
When you focus on your opinion, what is lost?
Active Listening
How do you give your opinion?
by speaking
Examples where you need listening –> good communication at work?
1) giving or receiving instructions
2) disagreement with a colleague
3) discussing a problem
4) mentoring
5) interview
Define Colleague
Someone you work with
compare assertive and aggressive behavior
1) both stand up for yourself
2) assertive respectful of others, aggressive not respectful
What is negotiation
The process to find a solution for a problem with different people, who might want different things