Chapter 3: Learning to Accept Yourself

Question 1

A restrictive, punitive style of parenting focusing on following rules and assuming that the child is incompetent.

Answer 1

Authoritarian parenting

Question 2

Parents who are involved, warm, and nurturing while at the same time setting meaningful limits and controls for the child.

Answer 2

Authoritative parenting

Question 3

The person you feel you should be

Answer 3

Ideal self

Question 4

The belief that one is surrounded by enemies; a belief that one is detestable and deserves to be treated poorly.

Answer 4

Malevolent attitude

Question 5

A negative inner voice that attacks and judges you.

Answer 5

Pathological critic

Question 6

The person you feel you actually are.

Answer 6

Real self

Question 7

Your paradigm about yourself reflected in how you might describe yourself.

Answer 7

Self-concept

Question 8

A measure of how much you value yourself and feel useful and necessary in the world.

Answer 8

Self-esteem

Question 9

The degree to which you feel worthwhile as a human being within the standards of your culture.

Answer 9

Self-worth

Question 10

A psychological characteristic exemplified by consistent behaviors across time, place, and situations.

Answer 10

Trait

Question 11

The development of virtues and their corresponding signature strengths

Answer 11

Character

Question 12

The tendency to look for verification to support your existing opinion

Answer 12

Cognitive distortions

Question 13

Occur when parents judge a child’s values and delivers their love based on the acceptability of the child’s behavior at the moment

Answer 13

Conditional positive regard

Question 14

When an individual thinks they are worthwhile or lovable only if they behave in certain ways or meet certain standards

Answer 14

Conditions of worth

Question 15

Describes an individual with chronically low self-esteem

Answer 15

Inferiority complex

Question 16

Parents who are involved and loving with their children but who fail to set limits or provide meaningful controls over their behavior

Answer 16

Permissive indulgent parenting

Question 17

Refers to parenting that is not particularly harsh or punitive, but treats the child as if she is not particularly important; uninvolved in child’s life

Answer 17

Permissive-indifferent parenting

Question 18

Those behaviors and traits which characterize the presence of a virtue in an individual’s character and which can be developed by exercising proactive choice; not the same as talent

Answer 18

Signature strengths

Question 19

Strengths that are valued in every culture, valued in their own right, and are changeable by choice and exercise of will

Answer 19

Virtues

Question 20

Occurs when a parent demonstrates acceptance of a child as having intrinsic merit regardless of their behavior at the moment

Answer 20

Unconditional positive regard