Chapter 10 - Gendered Intimacies Flashcards
What did Simone de Beauvoir’s The Second Sex highlight about men’s friendships compared to women’s?
Men’s friendships are considered more genuine and deep compared to women’s.
What did Lionel Tiger highlight about why men have deeper friendships?
Because of the old hunting groups and their tight knit relationships.
What are the 4 barriers that psychologist Robert Lewis highlights that explain why men do not participate in emotional intimacy?
- Competition
- Homophobia
- Lack of skills
- Lack of positive role models
What does Arlie Hochschild refer to as emotion work of women?
The expectation for women to meet their husbands emotional needs.
What does being “instrumental” in male friendships refer to?
Men learning they need to be instrumental in friendships refers to the need of shared activities rather than emotional connection.
Define companionate marriage.
An ideal of marriage as a loving partnership, rather than a partnership born of necessity. Allowed the choice of marriage for love.
When was the idea of companionate marriage normalized?
By the 1700s this idea was mostly normalized. But it wasn’t until the 1800s that it was fully normalized.
When was “dating” developed? Why?
It was developed earlier, but was the principal mode of connection by 1950. Now that love and attraction rather than necessity was favoured, dating was needed to find such love.
Define sodomy.
Unnatural sexuality and sexual practices, either anal or homosexual intercourse, etc.
When was the word “homosexual” coined? What did it entail?
The late 19th century. It drew a new picture of the homosexual the corrupt moralities of such a life. This new term placed another pressure on masculinity and men.
What did Deborah Tannen highlight about men and women’s language?
That men and women use language differently with different goals. Men have the goal of maintaining the upper hand and women have the goal of negotiating closeness via support.
What do english speaking women do in speaking that holds the submissive manner?
- They end a sentence in a slight rise in tone, almost a question mark.
- They use hedge words, which are phrases used to express uncertainty so the listener is encouraged to confirm their thoughts.
True or false: Men talk more than women do.
True.
Compare male-male and female-female friendships and their emotionality.
Women:
* more likely to share feelings
* face to face
* discuss wider variety of issues
Men:
* side to side speaking style
* activity oriented
Define the chosen family.
A group of supportive individuals a person chooses as their family.
True or false: Men have been proven to have a deeper belief in romance and love than women.
True. Men are more likely to believe in love at first sight, fall in love more quickly, etc.
Who initiates the breakup more often in a heterosexual relationship? Men or women?
Women tend to initiate the breakups first. Plus, women have an easier time getting over said breakups.
