Willpower 101 Flashcards
The Goal
“Who you would be, what type of life would you have, if you were the type of person who could do what you needed to do, when you needed to do it, whether you felt like it or not.”
The Engine
Willpower/self-control is the master attribute
Willpower is the engine that takes us from theory to practice
Self-control is teachable
Future Self
Think about my future self
Who do you want to be in 10 minutes, 10 days, 10 weeks, 10 months, 10 years?
Those with willpower have a positive picture of their future self
Is the future me going to thank me for my choices now?
Finite and Infinite
Willpower is both
Willpower fatigues, its limited
Willpower can be strengthened
Playing offense vs. defense
Don’t just use willpower defensively – I won’t eat that if tempted
Construct your life so that temptations don’t arise – play offense
Structure life accordingly
Be proactive, build systems, habits that makes your life easier
Buy your willpower at the grocery store
Pre-commit!
Pre-commit your future self to action, now
Have systems in our lives (if-than intentions)
If I wake up, I’m going to exercise….etc.
Recognize the price you are going to pay and pre-commit to pay it
Breath, Pause & Plan, Act
Control your impulses
Breathing is #1 tool to control impulses, boost willpower
Take a deep breath
Slow down via your breath, think about your longer term goals
Get out of flight or fight so you can pause and plan, act in integrity with your values
Breath, pause, plan consistent with your core values
Effective Stress Release Strategies
Higher stress = lower willpower
Effective stress release strategies (releases serotonin):
- Meditation, Exercise, Walking, Family, Relaxing
music, Petting a dog
Ineffective stress release (releases dopamine):
- Internet, TV, Drinking, Eating, Gambling/gaming
Eat, Move, Sleep, Focus
How we keep willpower engine finely tuned
Low blood sugar, low willpower
Feed the engine via healthy diet
Eat low glycemic foods
Moving/exercise provides immediate benefit for willpower
Use willpower to get a better night sleep – offensive strategy
Tired = lower willpower
Focus = meditation; anaerobic (strength) training for focus
Tiny + Tidy + 2 Minutes + To Completion
Willpower is a muscle
Tiny things (e.g., don’t swear) repeatedly done strengthen willpower
Tiny little habits have a powerful impact on positive habits
Tidy. Clean environment = higher willpower
Messy creates distractions, depletes willpower
If it can be done in 2 minutes, do it. Powerful impact on willpower (and time management)
Too completion. When you start something, finish!
Habit of starting and finishing things (don’t snatch that one marshmallow)
Finish what you start!
Live stream, game vs. shame
Shame does not help
We are not trying to be perfect
Shaming doesn’t work
We need high standards and high warmth
Make it a game, don’t make it about being perfect
Try to get a little better and celebrate those wins (and then repeat)
Make it a game, get out of shame
Let your ideal self blossom
Your Attitude Matters
If you think doing hard things depletes your energy and willpower, it does
If you think it energizes you, it does
Have a strong WHY!
SMART goals
Write down brief description of your ideal self; what are the positive things will you experience?
Live in more integrity with your values
Marshmallows
Kids with impulse control outperformed kids with lower impulse control – delay gratification
Kids that could delay gratification, cooled their impulses and heated their long-term vision of our ideal self
IQx2
Willpower out predicts IQ for academic performance X2
