Warning Signs Flashcards
Rosa was thoughtful for a moment, thinking over if there were warning signs. “I wanted a white dress when I was married,” she said “but nobody would pay for the dress I wanted and I didn’t have the money either. So, I was married in my favourite colour instead, blue - a long fitted dress with a jacket from Monsoon. I realise that the traditions are relatively new, a generation or two ago it was normal to marry in your Sunday best and that was good enough for everyone. It was a disappointment though. I’d rather have been in white or a pastel close to white. I guess we are all children of our cultures and times in one way or another, but the white dress, the wedding dress, that holds a great deal of emotional significance to many. Without it the photographs aren’t the same as other wedding photographs. They feel second rate, as if it is a comment on your worth even though it is only a dress. It was an odd wedding anyway. Half the family had made it very clear that I wasn’t good enough for them. They turned up looking posh and glowering. Then to top it all off the wedding official arrived in t-shirt and jeans and had way of speaking that reminded us of that scary movie, “Poltergeist.” She sounded like the character that says, ‘This house is clean,’ after it’s all over. As things turn out, it was the clearest warning sign I ever ignored.”
Rosa said, years on, that all the warning signs were there. There was an obsession with money to a degree that didn’t make any sense. Being frugal can be great, but being mean when it was important to show generosity was bad. A person who cannot enjoy anything for fear of what it cost financially is difficult to live with. They cause stress rather than remove it, thus take from the emotional bank of the household and never make deposits. They break the home and blame everyone else. So yeah, Rosa said shew as warned, that the signs were clear, but her self esteem had been low and she really thought she could turn him around, save him, teach him how to have fun and enjoy living. Instead he broke her. She recovered and moved on, older and wiser.
