The Romantic Love Cycle Flashcards
Love readiness
not a physiological state, but rather a state of mind; love is seen as being desirable and rewarding; longing for emotional and physical intimacy with another person; reflects the hopefulness that people have about being loved; people who view falling in love as a sign of weakness or as a distraction are unlikely to experience love readiness; some people are always in this state but never get any further
Falling in love
most people hope love readiness will lead to “falling in love”; happens differently for different people – love at first sight vs. gradual attraction; newness of one’s love makes this an exciting stage; feel “on cloud nine” and everything is right in the world; may also be a time of tension and insecurity; falling in love distorts objectively; sees the object of your affection as the ideal person who can fulfill all one’s wants and needs; most likely to overlook ____
Being in love*
synonymous with idea of romantic love; willing to accept even the flimsiest signs of reciprocation; can bring with it an emotional roller coaster of ups and downs – excitement and pleasure, and an inability to concentrate, eat or sleep; possible deterioration of other meaningful relationships; * psychologist Dorothy Tennov coined the term “limerence”– a type of love marked by obsession and preoccupation with the loved one, an intense form of love, the loved one is referred to as the limerent object; lasts an avg of 2 yrs; can change into companionate love, love in transition, or falling out of love
Companionate Love
a more realistic/stable type of love; based on affection, sharing, loyalty, trust, and togetherness; less possessive and consuming; allows 2 people to carry on their lives with a minimum of interference and a maximum satisfaction; can deteriorate into drabness if not sustained by continued affection and respect
Love in Transition
the feeling of being in love ceases to exist; usually one person initiates this stage but both can experience it at the same time; person starts to test the presumed strength of love; if relationship doesn’t measure up to one’s expectations, the conflict may lead to “falling out of love”; if both people are willing to work at improving the relationship, a temporary state of ___ may occur; couple can return to being in love stage; the new version of the relationship may be ___
Falling out of Love
enter this stage when difficulties cannot be resolved; communication becomes virtually nonexistent; problems that occurs aren’t worth the effort to overcome; usually painful experience fo rthe person who may still be in love– a) person may experience sorrow and heartache b) person may grieve the loss of the relationship c) may be angry and want to strike out at the other person
Being out of Love
results from falling out of love; can lead to love readiness, on the rebound, or refractory period.
