Perfectionism Flashcards
Perfectionism features
Expectations of perfection/excessively high standards
Variety of domains such as
•Tidiness, cleanliness, neatness
•Details of tasks (typos, formatting)
•Personal appearance/presentation
•Academic and career achievements
•Interpersonal interactions and relationships (have to have perfect relationships and things)
•Ethical, moral, and social issues (have to change the world)
Other features
•standards are impossibly high (for self and other)
•usually doesn’t see self as being perfect
•concern over mistakes/not being good enough
•focus on external standards (needs to hit goals set by others - grades)
•achieving high standards usually doesn’t bring lasting satisfaction (only temporary)
*success means higher expectations for next time
What is perfectionism
NOT a DSM diagnosis
•personality trait/behaviour present to varying degrees in all people
•high levels = negative mental health (depression, suicide risk SAD, GAD, OCD, chronic stress, substance use/maladaptive coping, interpersonal problems, personality disorders, subclinical personality difficulties, poorer treatment outcomes in therapy)
*depression and other disorders: they seem fine because they want to be perceived as perfect
Comprehensive model of perfectionism
Traits: underlying motivations and foundations of self esteem
•self oriented: I expect myself to be perfect
•other oriented: I expect those around me to be perfect
•socially prescribed: others expect me to be perfect
Attitudes: beliefs, values, and concerns
•high standards: satisfied with only perfect performance
•concern over mistakes: distressed over criticism or doing something wrong
Cognitions: specific moment to moment thoughts
•perfectionistic thoughts: pressure on self/situation
•self recriminating thoughts: self blame and denigration
Interpersonal behaviours: self presentation to other people
*goal: so people will like them more but actually does the opposite
•perfectionistic self promotion (showing off)
•non display of imperfection (never show self in negative way)
•non disclosure of imperfection (never talk about self in negative way)
Other behaviours: instrumental actions to be perfect
•excessive detail to focus: only hand in perfect assignments (procrastination due to fear of errors)
•overwork/overthink: to obtain perfect achievement
•criticism: i am only trying to help you get better (narcissistic injury)
•passive aggression: disconnect but fear of conflict
•submission/withdrawal: fear of negative social repercussions leading to less chance of getting what they want in a relationship
Associated emotions
•anxiety, depression, anger (frustrated goals, overwhelmed), guilt (didn’t do enough/did something wrong), shame (abandonment, bad person)
Self concept
•I am not enough but if I’m perfect then ill be enough
•If you saw how bad I really am you wouldn’t want me
Interpersonal Interactions
Pefectionsistc self presentation limits quality and depth of social connection
Specific interpersonal style related to other traits
1. Warm dominant: over involved, intrusive
2. Warm submissive: too accommodating/self sacrificing
3. Cold dominant: abrasive, critical
4. Cold submissive: withdrawn, dismissive
Interpersonal difficulties extend to therapists
•can’t see true self
Psychological factors
Interplay of fundamental attachment needs/developmental goals
•connectedness vs individuation
•conflicting but inter related demands that are both crucial in life
•people with high perfectionism have trouble balancing them
•connections to people seem conditional (people will only like me if I’m perfect)
•individuation of self seems fragile/externalized (I am only valuable if I achieve goals others have set for me)
Attachment needs: crucial in development
•human child helpless when born (survival depends on parents)
•maintaining attachment to parents is primary goal (figure out how world works to maintain these attachments)
Attachment asynchrony: parents don’t meet attachment needs
•can be inconsistent, neglectful, demanding, aggressive
•child learns survival by accommodating limitations of parents
*if they make a fuss, they’ll be abandoned, if parents are upset child feels not good enough
Neurotic paradox: why do people do things that make them unhappy/ have negative consequences
•previously necessary strategies no longer suited for current stressors
•its their coping strategy (they don’t know anything else)
Cyclic relational pattern
•acts of self: perfectionistic behaviours
•expectations of others/acts of others (don’t react how person expects)
•acts of self to self (when others don’t react the way I want I feel hopeless)
•emotional response: anxiety, depression, anger, shame, guilt
•coping: more perfectionistic behaviour
Sociocultural factors
Some evidence overrepresented in high achievement fields but can be seen anywhere/across multiple cultures (in different ways)
•lawyers, doctors, etc
Can also impair work and career goals
Idiosyncratic aspects of cultures matter
Unresolved questions: role of SES, education, and generational effects
Treatment
- Dynamic/relational group therapy
•method currently under investigation
•process group not skills (skills are unique to each person)
•interpersonal aspect and underlying attachment needs
•practice revealing imperfect aspects of self, give feedback, respond to each other in more genuine/authentic way
•ambiguity of social interaction scary, but useful exposure
•good to know there are others like them - Individual psychodynamic or interpersonal therapy
•process focused - relationship with therapist
•learning how to navigate relationship with therapists - Individual CBT
•focus on specific perfectionistic cognitions, beliefs, and behaviours (tackle perfectionism)
