Movies Flashcards
why so serious
not clown-jocker
used to think my life was a tragedy, but now I realize it’s a comedy
Costume’s a bit theatrical, but hey, who am I to talk?
Have you heard this one? It’ll kill you, Batman
What doesn’t kill you simply makes you stranger!
When I saw what a black, awful joke the world was, I went crazy as a coot!
As you know, madness is like gravity: All it takes is a little push
I don’t know what it was that bent your life out of shape, but who knows? Maybe I’ve been there too. Maybe I can help. We could work together. I could rehabilitate you. You needn’t be out there on the edge anymore. You needn’t be alone. We don’t have to kill each other. What do you say
If you’re good at something, never do it for free
When the chips are down, these civilized people, they’ll eat each other
The only sensible way to live in this world is without rules
Their morals, their code—it’s a bad joke.”
Wait ‘til they get a load of me
When they treat you like a joke, leave them like it’s funny
i won’t kill you because you’re just too much fun. I think you and I are destined to do this forever
You have nothing, nothing to threaten me with. Nothing to do with all your strength
If you don’t like the movie, I’ve got slides
A joke a day keeps the gloom away
Is it just me or is it getting crazier out there?
That’s not funny
It’s funny. When I was a little boy and told people I was going to be a comedian, everyone laughed at me. Well, no one’s laughing now
It’s not about the money, it’s about sending a message. Everything burns
You know, it only hurts when I laugh.
They need you right now, but when they don’t, they’ll cast you out like a leper
Don’t test the monster in me
I’m not good at future planning. I do not plan at all. Don’t know what I’m doing tomorrow. Do not have a day planner and don’t have a diary. I completely live in the now, not in the past, not in the future
Without Batman, crime has no punchline.
Does it depress you to know just how alone you really are
I’m crazy enough to take on Batman, but the IRS? Nooo, thank you
It’d be funny if it weren’t so pathetic
Do you know how many times we’ve come close to world war three over a flock of geese on a computer screen? Do you know what triggered the last world war? An argument over how many telegraph poles Germany owed its war debt creditors! Telegraph poles!
Why don’t you just give me a call when you start taking things a little more seriously
“I don’t know why everyone is so rude, I don’t know why you are; I don’t want anything from you
Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos. I’m an agent of chaos
Tell me something, my friend, have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?”
Some people want to see you fail. Disappoint them!
You know, you remind me of my father. I hated my father
Do you want to know why I use a knife? Guns are too quick.
The real joke is your stubborn, bone deep conviction that somehow, somewhere, all of this makes sense! That’s what cracks me up each time
Haven’t you ever heard of the healing power of laughter
Memories are what our reason is based upon. If we can’t face them, we deny reason itself
I’m a dog chasing cars. I wouldn’t know what to do with one if I caught it
I feel like I know you. I’ve been watching you forever
Those mob fools want you gone so they can get back to the way things were. But I know the truth: There’s no going back. You’ve changed things forever
Kid, I’m the Joker. I don’t just randomly kill people. I kill people when it’s funny
For my whole life, I didn’t know if I even really existed. But I do, and people are starting to notice.
Do I look like the kind of clown that can start a movement
A man with nothing to fear is a man with nothing to love
His mask is his real face
The worst part of having a mental illness is people expect you to behave as if you don’t
The worst part of having a mental illness is people expect you to behave as if you don’t
You look good. Been working out? You could probably use a little sun. Then again, who am I to talk
You actually believed that all it would take is a few chemicals, a couple of days in drug-induced isolation and a cheap little nervous breakdown and you’d have me all figured out? Like there was some rabbit hole you could follow me down to understanding?
I’m not political. I’m just trying to make people laugh
i always wanted to see my dame in lights. Heh. Even in a moment of abject saccharine, I still got it
You think men like Thomas Wayne ever think what it’s like to be someone like me? To be somebody but themselves? They don’t. They think that we’ll just sit there and take it, like good little boys! That we won’t werewolf and go wild
You really want to know what it feels like to be the clown at midnight? Where there’s only ever one joke and it’s always on you? Well, here you are. Now do you get it?”
When you bring me out, can you introduce me as Joker
Tell your men they work for me now! This is my city
You’ll never be sad, and you’ll never be lonely. You’ll always have me to dance with.”
You get what you f**king deserve
Devil is double is deuce, my dear doctor … and joker trumps deuce
You think he’s really gonna fix your nasty case of Joker-itis? Not a chance. I’m chronic, Brucie. I’m lingering
Here’s the cold, hard truth Bats…I don’t hate you ‘cause I’m crazy…I’m crazy ‘cause I hate you.”
Everybody’s telling me my standup is ready for the big clubs
Lady, you’re harder to kill than a cockroach on steroids
I don’t care what happens to the world, and I don’t play nice with others
Live…and in person! The Caliph of Clowns, the Grand Mogul of Mountebanks, the one and only Joker! Prerecorded for this time zone.”
My mother always tells me to smile and put on a happy face. She told me I had a purpose to bring laughter and joy to the world
I’m not mad at all. I’m just differently sane.
Can somebody tell me what kind of a world we live in, where a man dressed up as a bat gets all of my press? This town needs an enema
As though we were made for each other…Beauty and the Beast. Of course, if anyone else calls you ‘beast,’ I’ll rip their lungs out
Smile because it confuses people
Everybody just yells and screams at each other. Nobody’s civil anymore. Nobody thinks what it’s like to be the other guy.
f you have to explain a joke, there is no joke
All it takes is one bad day to reduce the sanest man alive to lunacy. That’s how far the world is from where I am. Just one bad day
I took Gotham’s white knight and I brought him down to our level
You can’t win anyway… You see, I hold the winning card
Very neat! That ugly head of yours does have a brain
This is what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object
And I thought my jokes were bad
They could put me in a helicopter and fly me up into the air and line up the bodies head to toe on the ground in delightful geometric patterns like an endless June Taylor dance routine—and it would never be enough. No, I don’t keep count. But you do. And I love you for it.
And here we go
There’s plenty wrong with me. Take my blood, for example. I wish somebody would—this stuff is killing me!
Ladies and murderers, welcome to the big fight
C’mon Bats, get crazy. It’s the only way to beat me
I have given a name to my pain, and it is Batman
I have given a name to my pain, and it is Batman
“I hope my death makes more cents than my life
Madness is the emergency exit. You can just step outside, and close the door on all those dreadful things that happened. You can lock them away forever
In my dream, the world had suffered a terrible disaster. A black haze shut out the sun, and the darkness was alive with the moans and screams of wounded people. Suddenly, a small light glowed. A candle flickered into life, symbol of hope for millions. A single tiny candle, shining in the ugly dark. I laughed and blew it out
I hope my death makes more cents than my life
I make art until someone dies. See? I am the world’s first fully functioning homicidal artist
You think it all breaks down into symbolism and structures and hints and clues. No, Batman, that’s just Wikipedia
Do I look like I’m joking
Over?! Why, my dear, delusional Dark Knight, it hasn’t even begun
Yes, memory’s so treacherous. One moment, you’re lost in a carnival of delight: childhood aromas, the flashing neon of puberty, all that sentimental candy floss. The next, it takes you somewhere you don’t want to be. Somewhere dark and cold, filled with the damp, ambiguous shapes of things you’d rather forget. Memories can be vile, repulsive little brutes. Like children, no
It’s a funny world we live in
Laugh and the world laughs with you
Parting is such sweet sorrow, dearest. Still, you can’t say we didn’t show you a good time. Enjoy yourself out there in the asylum. Just don’t forget: If it ever gets too tough, there’s always a place for you here
One by one, they’ll hear my call. Then this wicked town, will follow my fall
Hello Late-Show lovers…and lovers of the Late-Show
A bit of advice…don’t ever apologize to no one for the way you look
By clinging to reality, you’re denying the reality of the situation
Notice the hideously bloated sense of humanity’s importance. Also note the club-footed social conscience and the withered optimism. It’s certainly not for the squeamish, is it? Most repulsive of all, are its frail and useless notions of order and sanity
I am not someone who is loved. I’m an idea. A state of mind.”
Notice the hideously bloated sense of humanity’s importance. Also note the club-footed social conscience and the withered optimism. It’s certainly not for the squeamish, is it? Most repulsive of all, are its frail and useless notions of order and sanity.”
I am not someone who is loved. I’m an idea. A state of mind
If I weren’t crazy, I’d be insane
Now comes the part where I relieve you, the little people, of the burden of your failed and useless lives
You can’t rely on anyone these days, you gotta do everything yourself, don’t we? That’s OK, I came prepared
I’m not exactly sure what happened. Sometimes I remember it one way, sometimes another. If I’m going to have a past, I prefer it to be multiple choice
Forgive my laughter. I have a condition.
You see, in their last moments, people show you who they really are
Comedy is subjective, Murray. Isn’t that what they say? All of you, the system that knows so much, you decide what’s right or wrong. The same way that you decide what’s funny or not
Comedy is subjective, Murray. Isn’t that what they say? All of you, the system that knows so much, you decide what’s right or wrong. The same way that you decide what’s funny or not
Faced with the inescapable fact that human existence is mad, random and pointless, one in eight of them crack up and go stark slavering buggo! Who can blame them? In a world as psychotic as this…any other response would be crazy
Where, oh where has my little Bat gone? Oh where, oh where can he be? His cowl, his scowl, his temper so foul. I do hope he’s coming for me
You can’t kill me without becoming like me! I can’t kill you without losing the only human being who can keep up with me! Isn’t it ironic
I’m a man of simple taste. I like things such as gunpowder, dynamite and gasoline!
Ladies and Gentlemen! You’ve read about it in the papers! Now witness, before your very eyes, that most rare and tragic of nature’s mistakes! I give you: the average man
I can’t wait to show you my toys
Yet we’re linked, you and I. Like comedy and tragedy. Two sides, same coin
Are you seriously saying there is nothing, nothing special about our relationship
I’m gonna make this pencil disappear
If you actually let me finish a sentence, you might learn something! You might learn we’re not so different. You might even learn something about yourself.
Life’s a bowl of cherries and this is the pits
Batman, darling
- “You know, kids, a lot has changed while your old Uncle Joker’s been away. New Gotham, new rules, even a new Batman. But now I’m tanned, I’m rested, and I’m ready to give this old town a wedgie again!”
Why be a disfigured outcast when I can be a notorious crime god? Why be an orphaned boy when you can be a superhero
It’s true, Batsy! I know everything. And kinda like the kid who peeks at his Christmas presents, I must admit, it’s sadly anti-climactic. Behind all the sturm and batarangs, you’re just a little boy in a playsuit, crying for mommy and daddy
I’m only laughing on the outside. My smile is just skin deep. If you could see inside, I’m really crying. You might join me for a weep
You see, I’m not a monster. I’m just ahead of the curve
Don’t go into the light, bats! It’s no fair! They won’t let me in
Let’s put a smile on that face
You complete me
Oh, Batman, if you had the guts for that kind of fun you would’ve done it years ago. I, on the other hand…
Let’s take a moment to reflect on the passing of a man who was more than just another do-gooder in tights. He was the best arch-nemesis a sociopath could ask for.
Now, I see the funny side. Now I’m always smiling
Now, I see the funny side. Now I’m always smiling
Well look at the size of that cake, man!”
This city deserves a better class of criminal. And I’m gonna give it to them
Laugh it up now
If the police expect to play against the Joker, they’d better be prepared to be dealt from the bottom of the deck
You had a bad day and everything changed. Why else would you dress up as a flying rat? You had a bad day, and it drove you as crazy as everybody else…only you won’t admit it!
The pen is truly mightier than the sword
I’ve been using it as a journal, but also as a joke diary, if I have any thoughts or frustrations. I think I told you, I’m pursuing a career in standup comedy
Jingle bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg! The Batmobile lost a wheel and the Joker got away!
April sweet is coming in, let the feast of fools begin
Nobody panics when things go ‘according to plan,’ even if the plan is horrifying
If I weren’t insane, I couldn’t be so brilliant
We aren’t contractually tied down to rationality! There is no Sanity Clause
Everything anybody ever valued or struggled for… it’s all a monstrous, demented gag! So why can’t you see the funny side? Why aren’t you laughing
Do you know how I got these scars
No matter the situation, always wear a smile
