Mindfulness and Couple Relationships

Question 1

What is Mindfulness

Answer 1

Moment to moment awareness of one’s experience without judgment

Question 2

Mindfulness is both:

Answer 2

A state of mind and a trait - allows couples to be purposeful, non reactive and attuned to present moment.
Non reactive (means couples wait and see what options are before responding)

Question 3

How do you cultivate mindfulness?

Answer 3

Practice mindful meditation

Question 4

What are the three type of meditation?

Answer 4

1) Focused Attention
2) Open Awareness
3) Loving - Kindness

Question 5

What is Focused Attention Mindfulness?

Answer 5

Aka. Focused Awareness:
-focus on breath, object, mantra - return non-judgmentally

Question 6

What is Open monitoring?

Answer 6

AKA: open awarenss
-openness to sensations, thoughts, emotions
-attending fully to what is present
-closing eyes, noticing what is around, sound meditation

Question 7

What is Loving Kindness?

Answer 7

-Holding experience in loving and kind way
-Developing feelings of empathy and love for others (begins with self -> then others)

Question 8

What are the steps of focused attention monitoring?

Answer 8

1. Focusing on breath
2. Notice the wanderings of the mind
3. Non-judgementally return your attention to the breath

Question 9

In meditation how can you broaden focus?

Answer 9

Awareness to: body sensations, emotions, thoughts, feelings towards self, feelings toward others

Question 10

Why Meditate, What does it promote?

Answer 10

Self awareness, empathy, compassion linked with positive relationships.
-key elements of social and emotional awareness

Question 11

Why Meditate, What does it promote?

Answer 11

-Mindfulness promote growth and development related to social/emotional intelligence
-17 studies: meditators have increased volume and density in brains compared to non-mediators
-Short term meditation cause structural changes in brain (mid pre-frontal cortex)
-there is strong neurological component in relations (brain operating in certain ways promote negative or positive relationships)

Question 12

What is mindfulness considered?

Answer 12

-Mental exercise that can promote development of the brain
-Strengthens brain circuits that process and regulate affect, social cognition, social behavior (key elements of satisfying relationships)
-Richie Davidson – Wisconsin
Focused attention – repetitive process of noticing and bringing back - mental equivalent to weightlifting reps
-Brain vs. Mind

Question 13

What are mindfulness benefits for mental health?

Answer 13

Beneficial in treating:
-Anxiety
-Depression
-Chronic pain

Question 14

What are mindfulness benefits for physical health?

Answer 14

-Lower blood pressure
-Lower cortisol
-Increase immune function

Question 15

Mindfulness helps healthy individuals by:

Answer 15

Increases psychological well-being
Enhances cognitive functioning

Question 16

Mindfulness helps couples increase:

Answer 16

-Social intelligence
-people vary in ability to interpret intentions/motivations (pick up on cues vs. oblivious)
- brain does much of processing social intelligence without conscious awareness

Question 17

What makes a satisfies partner

Answer 17

-More attentive to details of other’s internal world
-More accurate in identifying details about partner daily life
-More aware when partner’s make bids for connection
-Notice positive behaviors during arguments
-Understand partner’s reasoning – even when don’t agree
-Avoid ruminating over negative events

Question 18

How does mindfulness create satisfied partners?

Answer 18

Mindfulness can help one notice and be aware of partner
Cumulative effect: the more they do something the better it gets

Question 19

What marks dissatisfied partners?

Answer 19

-Partners high emotional flooding (overwhelmed by negative emotions)
-DPA (activation of body’s alarm system):
Increased heart rate
Increase blood volume
Reduced oxygen
Increased adrenaline and cortisol
Increased amygdala activation
Begins when heart rate >100 bpm

Question 20

In disatisfied partners what is the association?

Answer 20

Clear association between DPA and relationship dissatisfaction:
- Husbands heading for divorce: 17 bpm higher
-Inhibits humor, creativity, empathy, and non-defensive listening

Question 21

How do satisfied partners regulate emotions?

Answer 21

-Regulate negative emotions during conflict
-Avoid “Negative Affect Reciprocity”: Responding to expressions of negative affect with negative affect
-Strongest correlate to dissatisfaction worldwide

Question 22

How Does Mindfulness Help

Answer 22

Mindfulness practice: Decreases sympathetic activity CNS and increases parasysmpathetic

Question 23

How Does Mindfulness Help with emotional regulations

Answer 23

-Prefrontal control systems regulate amygdala
-Exposure (turning towards unpleasant physical sensations)
-Disentangle negative emotions from thoughts
-Promoting physical soothing

Question 24

Empathy

Answer 24

-Highly correlated with relationship satisfaction
-Empathic attunement during arguments and difficulties is key
-Gottman – degree of empathy predicted relationship outcome
-Experience sharing – vicarious experiencing of another person’s emotion through activation of same emotion in oneself

Question 25

Mindfulness and Attachment

Answer 25

-Related to secure attachment
-Study: decreased in attachment anxiety and avoidance
-Internal attunement and interpersonal attunement (key-developing attachment)

Question 26

Mindfulness- therapeutic application

Answer 26

Turn resistance into rational
Educate: insight, have a program 8 week/15 week

Question 27

Integrating mindfulness into Couples Therapy

Answer 27

1. Help couples increase awareness of reactions
2. Help couples become responders vs reactors [Pre-session centering exercises, In-session practice (break in conflict to promote emotional regulation), Out of session individual and joint practice]
3. Integrate with behavioral, cognitive, and emotion-focused models
4. Formal and informal practices
   (Follow-up and accountability)