Love and Communication Flashcards
What is love?
- Special attitude with behavioral and emotional components
- Means different things to different people
- Difficult to define and measure
Passionate love
− State of extreme absorption in another person
− Also known as romantic love
Companionate love
− Characterized by friendly affection and deep attachment based on
extensive familiarity with the loved one
Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love
Love has three dimensions
intimacy, passion, commitment
as time passes, passion decreases, intimacy and commitment increase
Lee’s Styles of Loving
Characteristics of intimate human relationships
− Romantic (eros)
− Game-playing (ludus)
− Possessive (mania)
− Compassionate (storge)
− Altruistic (agape)
− Pragmatic (pragma)
* Hypothesis: relationship success is influenced by compatibility in styles of
loving
Chapman’s Five Love Languages
- Prominent theory of love in pop culture
- Chapman proposes five ways of expressing/receiving love called love
languages
− Receiving gifts
− Quality time
− Words of affirmation
− Acts of service (devotion)
− Physical touch - Limited empirical support
Falling in Love: Why and With Whom?
- The chemistry of love
− Neurotransmitters: norepinephrine, dopamine, phenylethylamine
(PEA), and endorphins
Strong link between feelings of being in love and release of
neurotransmitters
− Potential impact of hormonal contraception use in women
Reduced attractiveness to potential partners due to altered
chemical fertility signals
Proximity and Similarity
- Geographic nearness of one person to another
− Mere exposure effect: familiarity breeds liking or loving
− Greater proximity often reflects shared interests - Similarity of beliefs, interests, and values
− Level of physical attractiveness
− Age, educational status, and religion
− Race and ethnicity
Reciprocity
When we are recipients of expressions of liking or loving, we tend to
respond in kind
− Increases self-esteem
Physical attractiveness: physical beauty
− Important in early stages; draws people together
− May be an indicator of physical health
− Males place greater emphasis on physical attractiveness
Attachment
intense emotional tie between two individuals
− Rooted in infancy
Ainsworth’s attachment styles
− Secure, insecure, anxious-ambivalent, and avoidant attachment
* Adult intimate relationships as an attachment process
− Parent–child attachment styles are transferred
Issues in Loving Relationships
Relationship between love and sex
− Relationship between the two is not always clear
For example, “friends with benefits”
Gender differences: women may feel more emotionally involved
− Questions to debate
Does sexual intimacy deepen a love relationship
Do men and women have different views of sex and love
How do personal attributes differentiate views on sex and love
Jealousy in Relationships
Jealousy-prone person
− Tends to have low self-esteem and place a high value on wealth
and popularity
− Jealousy can precipitate partner violence
* Sex differences
− Women are more likely to acknowledge feelings of jealousy
− Men tend to focus more on sexual involvement with another
Robert
Ingredients in a lasting love relationship
− Self-acceptance and acceptance of partner
− Appreciation of each other and commitment
− Good communication, realistic expectations, and shared interests
− Equality in decision making
− Ability to face and deal with conflict