Istikhara Flashcards
When YOU can’t perform istikhara salah
- Menses
- Janabah
- No wudhu
What are the conditions of istikhara
- Halal matter 2. Non fardh matter. 3. Important to you 4. No strong resolve towards option 3. Before you made the decision. 5. You’ve done your research and narrow down the option to only one. 6. Can only do one decision per istikhara, can’t be in open question format.
What is Ibn Hajar statement shared regarding doing istikhara over small matters
” it might be small but it is impact can be monumental”
How many times do you say the topic during duaa
Twice. Once at the beginning and second timebefore sharrun
Good Signs
1.
Bad signs of istikhara
1.
What is Istikhara?
A deep-level skillset for decision-making that connects with Allah for guidance
What is the purpose of Istikhara?
To learn how to make decisions in line with Prophetic guidance and hope for blessings from Allah
How did people make decisions before Islam?
Birds flying left or right, drawing arrows, or random page selections from the Mushaf
What superstitions does Istikhara remove?
Twitching of the eye, earring falling, and seeing a black cat
How often did Shaykhana perform Istikhara?
10-20 times a week, but was advised it wasn’t enough
When should you perform Istikhara?
For anything important, even small decisions
What are the benefits of Istikhara?
Relying upon Allah, prosperous choices, and satisfaction in decreed outcomes
Is it sinful not to perform Istikhara?
Not sinful, but one may miss out on greater good
What types of actions are not legislated for Istikhara?
Obligatory actions, recommended actions, haraam actions, and disliked actions
What is the process of Istikhara?
Consultation with an expert, intention of Istikhara, and performing the prayer
When is the best time to perform Istikhara?
When it is needed, avoiding no-salah times
Can others perform Istikhara on your behalf?
Best to perform it yourself, but others can if connected to the affair
What is a good sign after performing Istikhara?
The affair becomes easy to execute
What is a bad sign after performing Istikhara?
The task becomes impossible to execute or loses all inclination
What should you do if you feel hesitant after a good sign?
Evaluate if you need to proceed or not
What is the primary indicator of a successful Istikhara?
The affair has been made easy
What factors should be considered in marriage according to Istikhara?
- Religion
- Character
- Attraction
- Family compatibility
- Financial stability
- Culture
What is the first step in the marriage decision-making process?
Research and get family involved from the start
What type of backbiting is permissible when researching a potential spouse?
Halal backbiting to share bad qualities
What should you do if you need an answer immediately and can’t perform Salah?
Recite the Istikhara duaa as needed
What should you do if you missed Istikhara at the initial stages?
Perform Istikhara for the remaining stages
What is the recommended way to handle multiple decision-making at once?
A single Istikhara prayer for all decisions with clear intention
Can you perform Istikhara for small or regular decisions?
Yes, but consultation may not be necessary
What is the significance of family approval in marriage decisions?
Family support can influence the success and harmony of the marriage
What is the purpose of asking someone else to look at a profile and do research?
To gain a clear and consistent picture of the person by asking multiple people about them.
This approach minimizes bias and promotes honesty in feedback.
What is meant by ‘halal’ backbiting in the context of marriage research?
Sharing both good and bad qualities of a person to provide a complete picture for decision-making.
This practice is supported by the example of Zainab and the Prophet ﷺ reviewing marriage proposals.
Why is a marriage CV considered insufficient without further research?
No one writes a CV with their cons, so additional research is essential to understand the true character.
Families may present an idealized version of a candidate.
What should you do if the person you are researching comes from a good family?
Recognize that the individual may not share the same characteristics as their family.
It’s important to assess the individual rather than relying solely on family reputation.
What is the significance of attraction in the marriage research process?
Attraction is subjective and may change as you communicate with the person.
Initial attraction does not guarantee compatibility.
What are key guidelines for sitting with a prospective spouse?
Be normal and ensure appropriate adult presence to maintain proper behavior.
The presence of a guardian is recommended, but they do not need to actively listen.
What type of questions should you ask during the communication phase?
- Common goals
- Common interests
- Understanding of the religion
- Expectations
- Deal breakers
Discussing these topics helps clarify compatibility and avoid future issues.
What should you do if someone gives false promises during the marriage process?
Stimulate conditions in the marriage contract to protect yourself.
This ensures accountability and clarity in expectations.
What does the saying ‘Al Mar’u ala deeni khaleeli’ imply?
A man is on the religion of his close friends.
This highlights the importance of assessing a person’s social circle.
What is the purpose of Istikhara in the marriage decision process?
To seek Allah’s guidance for both apparent and hidden aspects of the decision.
Istikhara should be done once you are considering a proposal seriously.
What should you do if you are rejected after proposing?
Understand that it is not a reflection of your worth; it simply was not meant for you.
Maintain objectivity to avoid emotional distress.
What are potential pitfalls to avoid during the marriage process?
- Being hasty in decision-making
- Succumbing to external pressures from family or society
- Confusing ease with goodness
These pitfalls can lead to poor choices and regret in marriage.
What is advised if your mental health is not stable during the marriage process?
Seek healing and mental health support before pursuing marriage.
This ensures that you are in a good place emotionally before committing to another person.
What is a common misconception about ease in decision-making?
Not all ease is khayr (good), as some ease may lead to sin.
Only ease that comes from obedience is considered beneficial.
Fill in the blank: It is important to ask for __________ before making a marriage decision.
Allah’s guidance through Istikhara.
