Habit 1: Be Proactive

Question 1

Define “self-awareness.”

Answer 1

The ability to think about your very thought process.

Question 2

How can we use our unique human capacity for self-awareness?

Answer 2

To examine our paradigms to determine whether they are reality- or principle-based or if they are a function of conditioning and conditions.

Question 3

What is our view of ourselves like if our only view of ourselves comes from “the social mirror”?

Answer 3

The reflection in the crazy mirror room at the carnival.

Question 4

Name and describe the three “social maps.”

Answer 4

Genetic determinism, “your grandparents did it to you.”

Psychic determinism, “your parents did it to you.”

Environmental determinism, “your boss, etc. are doing it to you.”

Question 5

What are the three “social maps” based on?

Answer 5

The stimulus-response theory we most often think of in connection with Pavlov’s experiments with dogs.

Question 6

Summarize the story of Victor Frankl.

Answer 6

Frankl was a determinist psychiatrist raised in the tradition of Freudian psychology. Being Jewish, he was imprisoned in the death caps of Nazi Germany. He decided he could decide within himself how all of that was going to affect him.

Question 7

Define “liberty.”

Answer 7

Options to choose from within one’s environment.

Question 8

Define “freedom.”

Answer 8

Internal power to exercise one’s options.

Question 9

Define “imagination.”

Answer 9

The ability to create in our minds beyond our present reality.

Question 10

Define “conscience.”

Answer 10

A deep inner awareness of right and wrong, of the principles that govern our behavior, and a sense of the degree to which our thoughts and actions are in harmony with them.

Question 11

Define “independent will.”

Answer 11

The ability to act based on our self-awareness, free of all other influences.

Question 12

Define “proactivity.”

Answer 12

As human beings, we have responsibility for our own lives.

Question 13

Describe the difference between proactive and reactive people regarding the weather.

Answer 13

If the weather is good, reactive people feel good; if it isn’t, it affects their attitude and their performance.

Proactive people can carry their own weather with them.

Question 14

Describe proactive response to external stimuli.

Answer 14

Proactive people are still affected by external stimuli, whether physical, social, or psychological. But their response to the stimuli, conscious or unconscious, is a value-based choice or response.

Question 15

Name and describe Frankl’s three central values in life. Which is the highest?

Answer 15

The experiential, or that which happens to us.

The creative, or that which we bring into existence.

The attitudinal, or our response in difficult circumstances such as terminal illness.

The attitudinal is highest; in other words, what matters most is how we respond to what we experience in life.

Question 16

Define “taking initiative.”

Answer 16

Recognizing our responsibility to make things happen.

Question 17

Describe “solution selling.”

Answer 17

If, for example, you want a better job, take interest and aptitude tests, study the industry, even study the specific problems the organizations you’re interested in are facing, and then develop an effective presentation showing how your abilities can help the organization’s problem.

Question 18

What does Covey mean when he says “use your R and I”?

Answer 18

Use your resourcefulness and initiative.

Question 19

What were the three questions asked on each respective day in Covey’s story of the group in the home improvement industry going through a period of bad business?

Answer 19

Day 1: What’s happening to us? What’s the stimulus?

Day 2: What’s going to happen in the future?

Day 3: What is our response?

Question 20

What does the language of reactive people do?

Answer 20

Absolve them of responsibility.

Question 21

Why is the language we use important?

Answer 21

It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Question 22

What is an excellent way to become more self aware regarding our own degree of proactivity? What tool(s) does Covey suggest to use to do this?

Answer 22

Look at where we focus our time and energy. Covey suggests using the Circle of Concern and the Circle of Influence.

Question 23

Describe what’s indicated by the Circle of Concern.

Answer 23

Separation of a wide range of concerns we have from things we have no particular mental or emotional involvement in.

Question 24

Describe what’s indicated by the Circle of Influence.

Answer 24

Separating those things within our Circle of Concern which we have no real control over from things we do.

Question 25

How can we discover much about the degree of our proactivity?

Answer 25

By determining which of the Circle of Concern and the Circle of Influence is the focus of most of our time and energy.

Question 26

Which circles, respectively, do proactive and reactive people focus on? How does this affect those circles?

Answer 26

The Circle of Influence and the Circle of Concern.

When proactive people focus on their Circle of Influence, the nature of their energy is positive, enlarging and magnifying, causing their Circle of Influence to increase.

When reactive people focus on their Circle of Concern, that focus results in blaming and accusing attitudes, reactive language, and increased feelings of victimization. The negative energy generated by that focus, combined with neglect in areas they could do something about, causes their Circle of Influence to shrink.

As long as we are working in our Circle of Concern, we empower the things within it to control us.

Question 27

Name and describe the three areas the problems we face fall into.

Answer 27

Direct control (problems involving our own behavior), indirect control (problems involving other people’s behavior), or no control (problems we can do nothing about, such as our past or situational realities)

Question 28

Describe the responses to the three types of problems we face.

Answer 28

Direct control: Habits 1, 2, and 3
Indirect control: Habits 4, 5, and 6
No control: Be positive.

Question 29

Summarize Covey’s story of an executive’s experience with a “gofer” delegator in charge of a company.

Answer 29

The “gofer” delegator was knowledgeable and talented in his field, but everyone complained about his “gofer” delegation. But one executive was proactive, driven by values, not feelings. He took the initiative–anticipated, empathized, read the situation. He compensated for his boss’s weaknesses and worked with his strengths. He focused on his Circle of Influence. He did more than was expected.

The boss was impressed and began to treat him better than the other executives.

This bothered the other executives, and they somewhat turned against him. But he was proactive toward them too, and little by little his Circle of Influence with them grew too.

Question 30

Describe the relationship between the Circle of Concern, the Circle of Influence, “have’s,” and “be’s.”

Answer 30

The circle of concern is filled with the “haves.” The Circle of Influence is filled with the “be’s.”

Question 31

What Old Testament story does Covey recount in his description of “have’s” and “be’s”?

Answer 31

The story of Joseph.

Question 32

Are consequences in our Circle of Concern or our Circle of Influence?

Answer 32

Circle of Concern.

Question 33

What are consequences governed by?

Answer 33

Natural law.

Question 34

When we choose our response, what else do we choose?

Answer 34

The attendant consequence.

Question 35

What is “a mistake of a different order”?

Answer 35

Not to acknowledge a mistake, not to correct it and learn from it.

Question 36

What is at the heart of our Circle of Influence?

Answer 36

Our ability to make and keep commitments and promises.

Question 37

In regard to commitments and promises, what do we become conscious of through self-awareness and conscience?

Answer 37

Areas of weakness, areas for improvement, areas of talent that could be developed, or areas that need to be changed or eliminated from our lives.

Question 38

In regard to commitments and promises, as we recognize and use our imagination and independent will to act on the awareness we gain from exercising our self-awareness and conscience, what do we do, and what do we build on?

Answer 38

We make promises, set goals, and be true to them; we build the strength of character, the being, that makes possible every other positive thing in our lives.

Question 39

Through what do we develop the proactive capacity to handle the extraordinary pressures of life?

Answer 39

The ordinary events of everyday life.

Question 40

What does Covey challenge the reader to at the end of the chapter?

Answer 40

A thirty-day test of the principle of proactivity.