Final Flashcards
- Real self
the person you are (experiential system)
What is flow?
When you are “in-the-zone” of something you enjoy
- Ideal self
the person you want to be
o Rational self (social norms)
o In the future, not real
Why is ideal self flawed?
o Cannot know where you are going because you have never been there (psychologically)
What is the state of consciousness?
The connection of real and ideal self
Why do many people fail to connect their real and ideal selves?
- Generous (ideal self) self-created because of my selfish self (real self)
- Since the generous self-came from selfish self, it is actually selfish
- Practice generosity in a selfish way
What are the two steps to mindfulness?
1. Acknowledge it (DO NOT say should/wishful thinking/ideal self)
2. You start to do whatever you were not doing (You stop whatever you were doing)
- Past self
the person you were
How are the 3 selves connected?
o Real self makes assumptions based on past self to predict ideal self
Whos theory involves the selves?
Carl Rodgers (person-centered theory)
What are tensions/anxieties according to Rodgers
o Pressure between ideal and real self
What is the difference between humanistic and existential therapy
- humanists believe that each of us has a
natural potential that we can actualize and through which we can find meaning
-Existentialists focus on the anxiety that ensues from having to create an identity in world that lacks intrinsic meaning
What is conditional positive regard?
Conditions of worth
- using words like: shoulds, musts, always
- Self-acutalizing tendency
striving toward realization (real self; you think you want what society wants you to want), fulfillment, autonomy, and self-determination
Rodgers is view of human nature is concerned with…
maslow’s hierarchy of needs
The 3 Therapeutic Goals in Rogerian Theory
- Provide a climate for the client to self-actualize
- Have to come face-to-face with one’s ideal self that was created through socialization
- Signs that client is coming self-actualized: an openness to trust in themselves and internal source of evaluation, a willingness to continue growing
TEST ON ALDRIAN AND SELF PSYCHOLOGY
- State of incongruence
anxiety from discrepancy between real and ideal self
Why do clients come into therapy (rodgers)
- They come for therapy because feelings helpless, powerless, and not in control of their lives
- Less bound by the past and the future; freer to live in the moment
What are the therapeutic core conditions (3 of them)
congruence, unconditional positive regard, empathic understanding
o Congruence
To be authentic; inner experiences and outer expressions of those experiences match
Openly expresses feelings, thoughts, reactions in the here-and-now to enhance the therapeutic relationship
o Unconditional positive regard
Non-judgmental of client’s feelings, thoughts, behaviors
* Ex. Pedophiles (sin from sinner)
A sense of caring for the clients’ well-being that does not come from one’s own need to be liked and appreciated
* “Are you doing things for them or are you trying to prove you are caring”
o Accurate Empathic Understanding
To sense client’s subjective experience in the here and. Now as if they were his or her own without getting lost in them
Empathy at the emotional and cognitive levels to understand the meaning and feelings of a clients experience
* Perspective taking
- Dasein
being-in-world; inherent need for all of us exist in the world and to achieve a sense of being autonomous and distinct
o My existence is making a difference
How does one live a meaningful life?
by affirming and asserting our Dasein in the face of pressures to conform, misguided rules and standards and DEATH
where does anxiety come from?
an awareness of an eventual end to our being through death, and the impending psychological destruction posed by rejection and insults
how is anxiety different from fear?
anxiety is ontological- it is born out of the clash between being and the threat of non-being
Why is it bad to avoid discussion of death?
Then we deny our Dasein, and choose conformity or apathy
Why is it important to accept proposition 6?
o Death gives significance to life by reminding us to appreciate the present moment
o Death can be the source of zest for life and creativity
What is important in order to be healthy according to existential psychology
accept this anxiety as inevitable part of being, meaning fully accept nonbeing as an inseparable part of being
What is proposition 4?
Search for Meaning
What is proposition 6?
Proposition 6: Awareness of Death and Nonbeing
Why is proposition 5 important?
o We avoid anxiety by creating an illusion of security
o Life is inherently meaningless
Attach meaning to things (ex. a rose is just a flower)
Meaning is that we exist
What is proposition 5?
- Proposition 5: Anxiety as a Condition of Living
o Existential anxiety arises as a result of confronting our death, meaninglessness, freedom, isolation (we cannot change about ourselves/I am not ___), aloneness, and our basic fallibility
How are old values connected with our meaning?
Anxiety created as result of discarding old values (traditions) and not creating new ones
Natural to flounder for a while as a result of the absence of clear-out values
* Ex. Marriage was created, but we do not dare change it
How is meaninglessness connected with our meaning?
Emptiness and hollowness= existential vacuum
If I am going to eventually die, why should I bother doing anything?
Everything just is
* Ex. giving a rose to someone, but in the end, it’s just a flower with no meaning?
How do we create new meaning?
Meaning/happiness is created from engagement with what is valued
Meaning cannot be obtained directly; must be pursued obliquely
* Changing parts of society and making them applicable to you
What is proposition 3?
Striving for identity and relationship with others
What is the courage to be?
Our greatest challenge is to confront our fear that there is no core, no self, but merely a reflection of others
* Afraid to look at self and see empty inside
What is The experience of aloneness
We alone must define meaning to life
We alone must decide how we want to live
* This activity is meaningful to me -> creates courage to be self
What is the Experience of relatedness
Being able to stand alone leads to fulfilling and not deprived relationships
Distinguished between neurotic dependence and life-affirming relationship
What is Struggling with our identity
Ritualistic behavior patterns attached to an identity acquired early in life
* Ex. What you eat for breakfast, why do you beat yourself up psychologically,
Not in the “being” mode, but a “doing mode”
What is proposition 2?
Freedom and responsibility
Why is freedom and responsibility important?
o We are free to choose among alternatives to shape our destiny
o We long for freedom but we run from it when we are asked to choose
Ex. choosing the “wrong” choice
* Not willing to accept responsibility
o Freedom
responsible for our lives for our actions and for our failures to take action
Not doing something, is still doing something
o Existential guilt
knowing we have chosen not to choose and contributes to a sense of incompleteness (“I’m not what I have become”); have given in to anxiety and have not risen to do what we know is possible for us to do
I want to choose so I can have a sense of my own power (I don’t wanna be someone’s doormat)
Take responsibility of own life
o Authenticity
the courage to be who we want to be; based on what is a valuable existence for me
I choose what I want from my life
* Ex. I want to go to nail school; not go to college
What is proposition 1?
Capacity for self-awareness
o Consequences of dependence
identity is defined by others (need for approval)
Ex. Want someone to validate us (mirrored grandiosity)
Do what other people want us to do
o Price for becoming self-aware
movement from deadness to turmoil
Why is it hard to become self-aware?
o Preoccupied with past, planning for the future, and doing too many things at once – not living in the moment
o Preoccupied with avoiding suffering (anxiety) and death and not appreciating living
What realm is concerned with the future?
psychological
What are therapy goals of existentialism
- Become more present with oneself and others
- Identify factors that block our ability to be fully present
o Why does life suck? - Assume responsibility for our one lives
o Ex. experiencing racism, still need to take responsibility that racism exists and what am I gonna do about it? - To live a more enriched life
What are the therapist function/goals of existentialism
- Help clients accept responsibility for their lives
o ex. feel life is meaningless, you haven’t found your own meaning, you are living off other people’s sense of meaning - Help clients move away from “restricted existence” that is stifling their present existence
o Only doing what others want you to do
Client experience in existentialism
- Experiment with new ways of being in the outside world
- Loosen their “deterministic shackles”
o You do something you enjoy, tell other people to fuck off <3 - Confront ultimate concerns instead of being solution-oriented
o Take away from immediate problem
What is the Relationship between therapist and client?
- “here-and-now” is stressed through genuine concern and empathy
o No past/future questions - Therapy is viewed as a social microcosm
o Therapist can get sense of other relationships - Journey of self-discovery taken both by the client and the therapist
- Holism
o You must know WHOLE not just a part, do not pay attention to just 1 thing
- Phenomenological
focus on clients perceptions of reality
- Process-based
focus is not on content (how clients behave in the present is far more important than why they behave as they do)
o Ex. fist punching, “what is your fist doing, make it talk, what does it say”
- Experiential
direct experiencing is much more important than abstractly talking about a situation
o Concerned with experiential system/implicit beliefs (not rational)
Contact
connection with the external world (e.g., other people) and internal world (e.g., disowned parts) are monitored
o Ex. how you eat breakfast every day vs. how you talk to your significant other (external world)
o Ex. anger at father, however according to society you ignore that part of you (internal world)
- Paradoxical theory of change
to “be” as fully as possible, rather than becoming what we “should be”
Real vs Ideal self
Selfish self (real self) vs generous self (ideal self) – your way of being generous is your selfish self
If you try to be generous, you are not focused on your selfishness; you are still selfish even if you think you are generous
To be generous you must first accept you are selfish
- Interest in whole person
thoughts, feelings, behaviors, body, memory, and dreams are all tended to equally
o Whole is more important than sum
- Figure
experiences that are the most important
o Ex. 2 photos within one
- Ground
experiences that are out of awareness in the “background”
o Cues: physical gestures, tone of voice, demeanor, and other nonverbal
Ex. brushing your hair
Soothing yourself
- Field theory
need to understand clients within their environment which is constantly changing. Everything is considered to be influx, interrelated and relational
- Figure-formation process:
the background and become the figure and the figure can become the background at any given moment
o Putting things you do not accept into the background and things you accept into figure
Ex. “I am racist” in figure while “I am not racist” in background
o ALWAYS HAPPENING (life is suffering)
- Organismic self-regulation
equilibrium is disturbed by the emergence of a need, a sensation or interest from the background. Can take actions to restore equilibrium or make contacts that promote growth and change
How do you restore equilibrium?
going against what is true/what makes you feel better
Ex. I’m not racist, I posted a black box on insta for black people
- The now (phenomenological inquiry
pay attention to what is happening now to contact the present moment. Focusing on the past (dead) or future (fantasy) is a way to avoid present. Do not ask “why”, ask “what” and “how”. Focus on what’s happening NOW
- Unfinished business
lack of resolution will result in resentment, rage, hatred, pain, anxiety, grief, guilt, and abandonment; these feelings that not fully experienced in awareness linger in the background and interfere with effective contact with oneself and others and lead to: preoccupation, compulsive behavior, wariness, and self-defeating behavior
- Impasse
feeling stuck because the customary way of doing things does not work
o Ex. pull out phone but you can’t avoid your problems/unfinished business
- Resistance to contact
refusal to experience the present to a full and real way, which results in dysfunctional behavior if it’s chronic
o Introjection
Uncritically accept others’ beliefs and standards
Take everything in, no questions
What are boundary disturbances
defense mechanisms used to become closer with other people
o Projection
Seeing in others qualities that we refuse to acknowledge in ourselves
We are just blah
o Retroflection
Doing to ourselves what we would like to do others or doing for ourselves what we would like someone else to do for us
What you want to do to someone else and you do it to yourself
* Ex. self-harm (not only reason for self-harm)
* Ex. Masturbation
o Deflection
Distraction or veering off from topic (e.g., humor, abstractions, questions)
o Confluence
Blur differentiation between self and environment (not rock the boat) because of a high need for being accepted. Symptoms: absence of conflict, slowness to anger, and believe that everyone experiences the same feelings and thoughts
Why you are bad at dealing with conflicts
Can’t get mad at the person, but super angry alone
- Interruptions in contact lead to:
Employ boundary disturbances to control environment
Gestalt THERAPEUTIC GOALS
- Awareness includes knowing the environment, knowing oneself, accepting oneself, and making contact
- Awareness = contact = integration of disowned parts
- Identity is not static, we are constantly discovering parts of ourselves as we face new challenges
Top dog
the “critical parent” that manipulates with threats
Ex. “stop playing games and go to bed!”
Male in straight relationship
Underdog
manipulates by playing the powerless victim; finds excuses
Ex. “I wanna keep playing games”
female is straight relationship
o Empty chair technique
a powerful tool for identifying this constant struggle
Pretend someone is in the other chair
Good with veterans
- Reversal exercise
Do the opposite of what one is comfortable with
o Ex. only wear black; wear something super flashy (figure formation focus)
DO NOT CARE where people got the idea
- Rehearsal exercise
Share private rehearsals out loud to increase spontaneity
- Exaggeration exercise: exaggerates movements, gestures, and postures to become aware of a subtle signals and cues
o Ex. shaking your leg
- Staying with the feeling
avoid fleeing from uncomfortable feelings and experience the pain fully to enhance growth
o Don’t run away when you are confronted with truths about yourself (I am racist)
Gestalt therapists goals/function
- Values self-discovery in clients
- Does not make interpretations
- Pays attention to client’s body language (nonverbal cues), which provide clues to feelings that the client is unaware and to discrepancies (incongruities)
o “I am Groot” vs “I am fine” - Is also attentive to language pattern
Gestalt client experience
- Active participant who make their own interpretations and meaning
discovery
realization about self or see something old in a new way
Ex. realization of issues regarding trust & etc.
accommodation
recognizing that they have a choice about how to respond
assimilation
learning to influence the environment and not be passive – ability to improvise
Ability to be spontaneous
Ability to accept change/not have control
Ability to make FULL CONTACT helps realize future anxieties about similar situations
Gestalt RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN THERAPIST AND CLIENT
- Person-to-person relationship between therapist and client
- Not technique-bound, relationship is what really counts
Gestalt Therapy Techniques
- Experiment: shift the focus of counseling from talking about a topic to an experiential activity that will heighten the client’s awareness and understanding
- Experiments are not exercises; they are spontaneous and relevant to the moment
- Technique to bring out internal conflict and “unstuck” the client
- Confrontation: point out discrepancies
