exam 4 Flashcards
feminine socialization
talk is primary path to intimacy
comm is responsive and supportive
questions and feedback
expect to be known intimately by friends
masculine socialization
closeness through doing
engage in fewer verbal emotional disclosures
working toward common goals builds camaraderie
give and take favors
men disclose personal feelings, hopes, and concerns, just less than women
what are the two dimensions of trust
confidence that others will be dependable
assumes emotional responsibility
what are the three factors in trust building
individual histories
family scripts
willingness to take risks
what are ways to support friends
listening to problems
letting them know they aren’t alone
availability
what is the first stage in the growth of friendship? what happens during this stage?
initial meeting -
standard social rules and roles
rely on general scripts and stereotypes
awkward and uncertain
check for common ground, values, and interests
what is the second stage in the growth of friendship? what happens during this stage?
fledgling friendship -
invitation move beyond social roles
involve others to lessen potential awkwardness
a lot of friendships end at this phase
friends enjoy interacting but don’t invest a lot of effort
disclosures and investments are limited
what is the third stage in the growth of friendship? what happens during this stage?
nascent stage -
friends begin to work out their private rules for interacting
settle into patterns and never expand those boundaries
often aren’t aware of the rules until later
people begin to think of themselves as friends
what is the fourth stage in the growth of friendship? what happens during this stage?
established friendship -
assumption of continuity
close friendship is unlikely to stabilize until there is a mutually high level of trust
once stabilized they are often integrated into the larger contexts of each friend’s social networks
nurture multiple established friendships at the same time
what is the fifth stage in the growth of friendship? what happens during this stage?
deterioration -
abrupt ending
gradual waning
serious violation of friendship rules
if you became friends with someone when you move to a new town, but in a couple months lose contact because you move to college, what kind of friend were they?
a friend of the road
if you continue being friends with someone for years on end, throughout hardships and geographic changes, what kind of friend are they?
a friend of the heart
what is the most important guideline for friendship?
engage in dual perspective taking
what are three of the guidelines for friendship that are of lesser importance
communicate honestly
grow from differences
don’t sweat the small stuff
what are the three qualities of a romantic relationship
passion, commitment, and intimacy
if you have intensely positive feelings and a fervent desire for another person (powerful emotional, spiritual and intellectual excitement), what quality of a romantic relationship are you experiencing?
passion
if you invest into a relationship and it gets reciprocating, living through trouble, disappointments, sporadic restlessness, and lulls in passion. what might be the next step in the relationship?
commitment
there are two reasons why people commit to relationships, what are they?
1
find it comfortable and pleasing
value companionship, emotional support, financial assistance, practical help
2
avoid negative consequences that would accompany ending it
violating religious values, family disapproval, financial hardships
if a couple is less satisfied and less likely to stay together permanently what might have been the reason they committed to a relationship?
to avoid negative consequences that would accompany ending it
if a couple is satisfied and likely to stay together permanently what might have been the reason they committed to a relationship?
they find it comfortable and pleasing. they value companionship, emotional support, financial assistance, and practical help
If people in a relationship rate companionate features as the most important and state feelings of closeness, connection, and tenderness what quality of a romantic relationship might they be feeling?
intimacy
what are the primary styles of loving?
eros
storge
ludus
if you fall in love with someone and it is powerful, passionate style of love that blazes to life suddenly and dramatically. If it is intuitive, spontaneous and fast-moving what style of love are you experiencing?
eros
if you fall in love with someone and it is comfortable and based on friendship and compatibility (common interests, values, and life goals), developing gradually what kind of love are you experiencing?
storge
if you fall in love with someone and it is playful, game-like, and non-committal, what type of love are you experiencing?
ludus
what are the three secondary love styles?
pragma
mania
agape
if you fall in love with someone and it is practical and secure. After having clear criteria for partners and practical considerations are the foundation of enduring commitment what type of love are you experiencing?
pragma (mix of ludus and storge)
if you fall in love with someone and you experience emotional extremes, obsess about the relationship, and devise tests and games to evaluate a partner’s commitment, what type of love are you experiencing?
mania (mix of eros and ludus)
if you fall in love with someone and you tend to put a loved one’s happiness ahead of your own without any expectation of reciprocity, finding that loving and giving to another are their own rewards what type of love are you experiencing?
agape (mix of eros and storge)
there are multiple stages of committed romantic relationships what is the the stage that states each of us is an individual with particular needs, goals, love styles, perceptual tendencies, and qualities that affect what we look for in relationships? (stage 1)
individuality
if people signal that they are interested in interacting and also respond to invitations from others (often due to proximity and similarity) what stage of committed romantic relationships are they in?
invitational communication
if someone is considering the possibilities for a long-term relationship, what stage of committed romantic relationships are they in?
explorational communication
when people start expressing more personal thoughts and feelings as well as begin to create our own relational culture what stage of committed romantic relationships are they in?
intensifying communication
when people think and communicate about possible problems and dissatisfactions that exist within the relationship as well as evaluate the likelihood of the relationship continuing what stage of committed romantic relationships are they in?
revising communication
when the decision is made to stay with the relationship over the long haul and arrange other aspects of their lives around the relationship what stage of committed romantic relationships are they in?
commitment
Attractiveness, proximity, and similarity are all values that influence what?
attraction
rules, understandings, meanings, and patterns of acting (including idioms and code words) and interpreting that partners create and agree upon for their relationship are considered what?
relational cultures
if you wish to terminate a relationship but only you know and you tend to go through mental role playing what type of wish to terminate are you having? and what does this lead to?
secret
may affect behavior and lead to withdrawal and avoidance
if you wish to terminate a relationship and directly inform your partner, or they confront you for your avoidance and withdrawal what wish to terminate are you having?
private
if you wish to terminate a relationship and relational constellations experience grief and deprivation (with high stigma), with social networks helping in creating the accountant process what wish to terminate are you having?
public
Fitzpatrick distinguished 3 relationship types, what are they?
independent
traditionals
separates
if a relationship holds less conventional views of marriage and family, with high emotional expression and low interdependence. This relationship may also engage in conflict often and share few common interest and activities do to moderately high autonomy, what type are they? (fitzpatrick)
independent
if a relationship shares conventional views of marriage and family, with high interdependence and emotional expression with each other what type are they? (fitzpatrick)
traditionals
if a relationship is highly autonomous, try to avoid conflict, and share less emotionally what type are they? (fitzpatrick)
separates
there is a marital satisfaction curve, what shape is it?
U curve
What are three things that may help satisfy relationships?
words
thoughts
emotions
how partners talk and behave towards each other influences partners’ self-esteem and feelings about the relationship is what type of satisfaction?
words
how partners think about each other and their marriage is what type of satisfaction?
thoughts
how we feel based on what we say to others and what we communicate to ourselves through self-talk is what type of satisfaction?
emotions
what is the social exchange theory
when people apply economic principles to evaluate their relationships
fairness, based on the perception that both people involved in the relationship benefit similarly from their investments is a definition of what?
equity
Young couples without children who work out expectations, interaction patterns, and daily routines for shared life are in what family life cycle?
establishing a family
Families with infants and/or preschoolers who are transitioning to parenthood are in what family life cycle?
enlarging a family
families with children in elementary or high school are in what family life cycle?
developing a family
families with adolescents who are developing their own interests, activities, and social circles are in what family life cycle?
encouraging independence
families who are launching children into the world are in what family life cycle?
launching children
couples after all chldren have left home and the couple is once again the primary unit is in what family life cycle?
post-launching children
couples when full-time work is no longer a part of life is in what family life cycle?
retirement
what family communication pattern is high conversational and high conformity?
consensual
what family communication pattern is high conversational and low conformity
pluralistic
what family communication pattern is low conversational and high conformity
protective
what family communication pattern is low conversational and low conformity?
Laissez-faire
