Eat Me By Patience Agbabi Flashcards
When I hit thirty, he bought me a cake,
Three layers of icing, home-made,
A candle for each stone in weight.
‘Hit’: hitting a barrier = violent undertone (control and power of domestic abuse)
Cake: celebratory - his obsession with her - he celebrates her weight (his power) rather than her as a person
‘Home-made’ idea that she is trapped in this relationship
DOUBLE MEANING: could be age or weight (if age: he celebrates her weight rather than her achievements as a person)
The icing was white but the letters were pink,
They said, EAT ME. And I ate, did
what I was told. Didn’t even taste it.
White: purity
Pink: sexuality and femininity (objectification)
Eat me: command (power and abuse)
Caesura: her doubt (pausing) to eat and the force of his authority
Enjambment : mirrors the constant eating
Didn’t taste it: shows she’s becoming numb and almost internalising his objectification by just letting it happen.
Then he asked me to get up and walk
Round the bed so he could watch my broad
belly wobble, hips judder like a juggernaut.
Juggernaut: unstoppable ( her changing weight and his power)
Asked: ironic - he is demanding her and manipulating her (domestic abuse)
Plosive alliteration: mirrors harsh changing of her body and his control
The bigger the better he’d say, I like
Big girls, soft girls, girls I can burrow inside
With multiple chins, masses of cellulite.
Plosive alliteration
Repetition of girls: emphasis on obsession with control over women
‘Girls’: infantilising her - makes her vulnerable and emphasises the power difference
‘Burrow inside’: he is hiding in his control over her (insecurity and obsession)
Listing: intensifies his obsession with women and control over what they look like
I was his Jacuzzi. But he was my cook,
my only pleasure the rush of fast food,
His pleasure, to watch me swell like forbidden fruit.
Objectification: her being an object of luxury contrasting the necessity of a cook - effect of abuse
‘Only’ shows she felt to satisfaction in this - only enjoyed the food
Forbidden fruit: biblical allusion - saw her as holy and special (fueled obsession)
His breadfruit. His desert island after shipwreck.
Or a beached whale on a king-sized bed
craving a wave. I was a tidal wave of flesh
Possessive: shows his control and power
Breadfruit: exotic also objectification
Desert island: he’s hiding his real self (insecurity that creates this want for power) unreachable and safe so he needs her for survival (ironic: she’s the one with the power over him since he needs her - obsession causes dependence)
King sized bed: she made him feel important like a king
Flesh: objectifies her - not a real human just flesh for his enjoyment
Too fat to leave, too fat to buy a pint of full-fat milk,
Too fat to use fat as an emotional shield,
Too fat to be called chubby, cuddly, big-built.
Anaphora: excess of control and power
The day I hit thirty nine, I allowed him to stroke
My globe of a cheek. His flesh, my flesh flowed.
He said, open wide, poured olive oil down my throat.
Tonal shift: she allows him - starting to get her power back (his insecurities coming back to him - effect of obsession)
Globe: his world - shows his obsession with having her always in his power
His flesh: first time being objectified - another sign of a power shift
Commands: still has some power
Soon you’ll be forty… he whispered, and how
could I not roll over on top. I rolled and he drowned
in my flesh. I drowned his dying sentence out.
Whispered: weaker and losing control
‘In my flesh’ effect of the abuse - she internalised the objectification
‘I drowned’: she’s doing the action (her taking back control over the narrative)
Dying sentence - double meaning: death or his voice and commands are what had power over her and now she’s taken it away
I left him there for six hours that felt like a week.
His mouth slightly open, his eyes bulging with greed.
There was nothing else left in this house to eat.
No more enjambment : power and control has been restored
Slightly open: still fighting for control
Bulging with greed: even when she kills him , he dies with that obsession he has with her and to keep her with him (effects of obsession and greed)
Last line: double meaning - a new start, nothing else left in the abusive relationship or a sense of emptiness (both show effects of the power that mirror domestic abuse)
Metaphor of her weight
Her weight is a representation of power - he doesn’t care about her weight, he cares about having control over her to make her look however he wants and humiliate her
This is a comment on domestic abuse and power dynamics
