Disconnection & Rejection Schemas Flashcards
EMOTIONAL DEPRIVATION (ED)
The expectation that one’s desire for a normal degree of emotional support will not be adequately met by others. The three major forms of deprivation are:
a) Deprivation of nurturance: absence of attention, affection, warmth, or companionship.
b) Deprivation of empathy: absence of understanding, listening, self-disclosure, or mutual sharing of feelings from others.
c) Deprivation of protection: absence of strength, direction, or guidance from others.
MISTRUST / ABUSE (MA)
The expectation is that others will hurt, abuse, humiliate, cheat, lie, manipulate, or take advantage. Usually involves the perception that the harm is intentional or the result of unjustified and extreme negligence. May include the sense that one always ends up being cheated relative to others or “getting the short end of the stick.”
EMOTIONAL CONSTRICTION (EC) [Subdivision of Emotional Inhibition (EI).]
The excessive inhibition or disconnection of spontaneous emotion, action, or expression, due to an underlying shame/embarrassment.
It involves inhibition of both negative impulses (e.g., anger, aggression, sadness) and positive impulses (e.g., joy, affection, sexual excitement, play), difficulty expressing vulnerability or communicating freely about one’s thoughts, feelings, and needs, or excessive emphasis on rationality over emotions.
There may be a sense of pride in being “a rational person”, or the moral/ethical value in one’s stoicism.
FEAR OF LOSING CONTROL (FLC) [Subdivision of Emotional Inhibition (EI).]
The excessive inhibition or disconnection of spontaneous emotion, action, or expression, due to a fear that one would otherwise lose control of their impulses resulting in dire consequences.
This may include fears of being overwhelmed by emotions (e.g., as in panic/fear or despair), fears of others’ response (e.g. abandonment/rejection, ridicule, judgment), fears of harming self/others (e.g. if giving in to aggressive impulses or intrusive thoughts), fears of ‘overindulging’ (e.g. losing control of spending, eating).
There may be an excessive preoccupation with one’s internal state and how one appears to others.
This anxious/dysregulated presentation is distinct from the more shame/pride-based presentation of Emotional Constriction.
DEFECTIVENESS / SHAME (DS)
The feeling that one is defective, bad, unwanted, inferior, or invalid in important respects; or that one would be unlovable to significant others if exposed.
May involve hypersensitivity to criticism, rejection, and blame; self-consciousness, comparisons, and insecurity around others; or a sense of shame regarding one’s perceived flaws.
These flaws may be private (e.g., selfishness, angry impulses, unacceptable sexual desires) or public (e.g., undesirable physical appearance, social awkwardness).
SOCIAL ISOLATION / ALIENATION (SI)
The feeling that one is isolated from the rest of the world, different from other people, and/or not part of any group or community.
May include a sense that one is an outcast, doesn’t fit in, or has been excluded by a group, community, or the world at large.
NEGATIVITY / PESSIMISM (NP)
A pervasive, lifelong focus on the negative aspects of life (pain, death, loss, disappointment, conflict, guilt, resentment, unsolved problems, potential mistakes, betrayal, things that could go wrong, etc.) while minimizing or neglecting the positive or optimistic aspects.
Usually includes an exaggerated expectation– in a wide range of work, financial, or interpersonal situations – that things will eventually go seriously wrong, or that aspects of one’s life that seem to be going well will ultimately fall apart.
Usually involves an inordinate fear of making mistakes that might lead to: financial collapse, loss, humiliation, or being trapped in a bad situation. Because potential negative outcomes are exaggerated, these patients are frequently characterized by chronic worry, vigilance, complaining, or indecision.
