Communication & Negotiation Flashcards
What are the 3 fundamental techniques in handling people?
- Don’t criticise, condemn or complain.
- Give honest and sincere appreciation.
- Arouse in the other person an eager want
What are the 6 ways to make people like you?
- Become genuinely interested in the other people.
- Smile.
- Remember the person’s name.
- Be a good listener. Encourage them to talk about themselves.
- Identify the other person’s interests and ask open questions.
- Make the other person feel important, and do it sincerely.
What are the 12 principles to win people to your way of thinking?
- The best way to win an argument is to avoid it.
- Begin in a friendly way.
- Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say, “you’re wrong.”
- Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view.
- Get the other person saying “yes, yes” immediately.
- Let the other person do the majority of the talking. Ask questions.
- Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
- If you’re wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
- Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires.
- Appeal to the nobler motives.
- Dramatise your ideas.
- Throw down a challenge.
What are the 9 principles of being a leader?
- Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
- Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.
- Talk about your own mistakes before criticising the other person.
- Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
- Let the other person save face.
- Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.”
- Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
- Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
- Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.
What are the 12 key tools for interacting with your counterpart?
- Active Listening
- Mirroring
- Tactical Empathy
- Labeling
- Accusation Audits
- Get Them To Say “No”
- Summarize To Earn a “That’s Right”
- Reframe The Discussion
- Calibrated Questions
- Finding the Unknown Unknowns
- Ackerman Model
What is the black swan, and how do you find it?
A black swan is a piece of information that if known can completely change the course of the negotiation. There are typically 3 black swans in almost any interaction. A black swan is typically information the other side is afraid to share or what they know, but may not know is important. We usually unearth black swans by asking lots of questions and reading non verbal ques.
What are the three types of leverage?
- Positive Leverage
- Negative Leverage
- Normative Leverage
What’s positive leverage?
It’s your ability to provide - or withhold - things that your counterpart wants.
Example:
I want to buy your car.
I’d like to hire your services.
What is negative leverage?
Negative leverage is what most people picture when they hear the word “leverage”. It’s your ability to make your counterpart suffer.
Example:
If you don’t fulfill your commitment I won’t pay the rest of the bill.
What is normative leverage?
Normative leverage is the application of the counterparts general norms for ones own good. Example: One says they only pay blue book prices for a car, you then show them that the price you’re charging is blue book.
What are the 5 big ideas to communication/negotiation?
- Negotiation begins with listening, making it about the other people, validating their emotions and building trust.
- Use mirrors to encourage the other side to empathize.
- Tactical empathy brings out emotion.
- Use calibrated, open-ended questions to draw out information and to say no without saying no.
- Label people’s emotions to build trust.
Conversation starter pack:
- Smile brightly. Deeply feel excited and look enthusiastic and really happy to meet the other person.
- Make the other person feel really interesting and important.
- Use small talk questions to start the conversation.
- Identify the person’s interests.
- Use calibrated questions to keep them talking about themselves.
- Listen intently. Mirror, label and use open ended questions to continue the conversation around them and their lives to build rapport.
