Ch.9 Flashcards
What is interpersonal attraction?
Desire to form or maintain an interpersonal relationship with them
What is short term initial attraction?
The degree to which you sense potential for developing an IP relationship with someone
What is the long term maintenance attraction?
Level of liking or positive feelings that motivates one to maintain or escalate an IP relationship
Why do we form relationships?
Appearance, similarity, complementarily, Reciprocal Attraction, Competence, Disclosure, proximity, rewards.
What is the matching hypnosis?
Tendency to seek out individuals who represent the same level of physical appearance/ attractiveness as oneself.
What is the social exchange theory?
Seeking out people who can give us rewards that are greater or equal to the costs that we encounter when dealing with them.
What is verbal immediacy?
A direct compliment or comment about the positive regard for that person.
What is nonverbal immediacy?
Behaviors that reduce the physical and psychological distance between each other
What are the five stages of relational escalation?
Initiating- showing interest, first exchange is innocent
Experimenting- small talk, getting to know each other through first date type questions
Intensifying- more time spent together, getting to know friends and family, trying to look physically attractive, showing they are attracted
Integrating- Social circles merge, “we” instead of “me” behavior rituals form
Bonding- symbolic public gesture of relationship (engagement, marriage, sharing residence, etc)
What are the five stages of re-relational de-escalation?
Differentiating- Asserting your individual identity, “we” orientation shifts to “me”
Circumscribing- Comm. decreases in quantity and quality, partners withdrawal from each other mentally or physically
Stagnating- Excitement is gone, take each other for granted, “still water”
Avoiding- Create physical distance between each other, make excuses to avoid each other
Terminating- Ending the relationship ( closure, divorce, etc.)
What are the three dialectical tensions (pg.282)
Connection vs. Autonomy
Openness vs. Privacy
Predictability vs. Novelty
What are the characteristics of Relationships?
Relationship are constantly changing
Relationship are affected by culture
Relationship require maintenance
Relationship require commitment
What are the types of relational transgressions?
Minor Vs. significant
Social vs relational
Deliberate vs. unintentional
One time vs. incremental
What are the strategies for relational repair?
- TALK about the violation
- Explicitly acknowledged that the transgression was wrong
- A sincere apology
- Some type of compensation
What are the two steps to forgive a transgression?
An explicit statement
A discussion of the implications of the transgressions and future of the relationship
What are the different types of relational maintenance strategies?
Positivity- keep the climate polite and upbeat; avoid criticism
Openness- talking about relationship (needs, concerns, and desires)
Assurance- letting The other person know (verbally & nonverbally) that you are committed to him/her
Social networks – being your partner’s friend, and also sharing friends
Sharing tasks - helping one another take care of life chores (washing car, clothes,); doing stuff together