Act 1 Scene 2 Flashcards
SHELBY: Never better. (Clairee Enters)
CLAIREE: My annual pecan tassies!
TRUVY: There’s my girl. I guess you’re the happy one this morning.
CLAIREE: Yes, I am. First state championship in eight years!
SHELBY: You sound awful, Miss Clairee!
CLAIREE: Hello, darling!
SHELBY: Can I get you some tea?
CLAIREE: Yes, that would be nice. I’m sorry I’m late. I overslept. We didn’t get back into town until one o’clock. It was a dazzling victory over Dry Prong.
SHELBY: What were you doing on the radio?
CLAIREE: They let me be the color announcer for the Devils. I was fabulous. I was too colorful for words.
SHELBY: That was nice of them to let you talk on the radio.
CLAIREE: Nice nothing. I own the radio station.
Shelby: Oh! You bought it?
CLAIREE: Yes!! KPPD. The station of choice in Chinquapin Parish!
SHELBY: It makes you look younger, Miss Clairee.
CLAIREE: My hair looks younger. My face looks just as old.
SHELBY: Who’s Miss Merry Christmas this year?
CLAIREE: My niece, Nancy Beth, of course.
Shelby: Why did I have to ask? I should have known. All you Marmillions are gorgeous. Beauty is genetic in your family.
CLAIREE: Nancy Beth is a pretty girl. Do you know she is Miss Merry Christmas, Miss Soybean, and Miss Watermelon?
TRUVY: But dumb as a post.
CLAIREE: Empty is the head that wears the crown.
SHELBY: I should’ve won Miss Merry Christmas the year I ran. My talent was very showy.
CLAIREE: We told you at the time, Shelby. Fire batons are not everyone’s cup of tea.
SHELBY: Who got the title your year, Miss Clairee.
CLAIREE: Oh, child. Nobody. There wasn’t even a Christmas festival when I was in high school. Why Jesus wasn’t even born until I was a junior in college. I remember it distinctly. My friends and I were all out watching our flocks by night…
OUISER: The parade doesn’t even start for four hours and already people are parking on my lawn. It will flatten my grass.
CLAIREE: Here. Let me hold you.
OUISER: I just finished putting out my yard decorations.
CLAIREE: Ouiser. Keep off the grass signs are not Christmas decorations.
TRUVY: That is Rhett! I didn’t recognize him.
CLAIREE: It’s nice to see Rhett with some hair again.
SHELBY: Owen Jenkins.
OUISER: Oh.
CLAIREE: Owen? Now there’s a blast from the past.
SHELBY: He doesn’t now. He hardly has any hair anywhere.
CLAIREE: Owen’s been gone from Chinquapin since God was a boy. I’d forgotten he’d ever existed.
OUISER: Shelby. I managed in just a few decades to marry the two most worthless men in the universe and proceed to have the three most ungrateful children ever conceived. The only reason people are nice to me is because I have more money than God. I am not about to open a new can of worms.
CLAIREE: Do I detect a negativity in your tone?
TRUVY: I could shoot you. I haven’t even started.
CLAIREE: Please. I haven’t even washed the dishes from Thanksgiving.
M’LYNN: She wants this so badly. I just don’t know…
CLAIREE: Oh boy…
ANNELLE: It will all be fine.
CLAIREE: Of course it will.
