2: Emotional and personality changes across adulthood

Question 1

Familiarity and similarity

Answer 1

Familiarity may breed contempt, as the old saying goes, but social psychologists have found that familiarity is a necessary condition for a close relationship to develop. For the most part, friends and lovers are people who have been around each other for a long time; they may have grown up together, gone to high school or college together, worked together, or gone to the same social events. Another old saying, “Birds of a feather fl ock together,” also helps to explain attraction. Overall, our friends and lovers are much more like us than unlike us (Guerrero, Andersen, & Afi fi , 2011; Qian, 2009). Friends and lovers tend to have similar attitudes, values, lifestyles, and physical attractiveness. For some characteristics, though, opposites may attract. An introvert may wish to be with an extravert, or someone with little money may wish to associate with someone who is wealthy, for example.

Question 2

Consensual validation

Answer 2

Why are people attracted to others who have similar attitudes, values, and lifestyles? Consensual validation is one reason. Our own attitudes and values are supported when someone else’s attitudes and values are similar to ours—their attitudes and values validate ours. Another reason that similarity matters is that people tend to shy away from the unknown. We often prefer to be around people whose attitudes and values we can predict. And similarity implies that we will enjoy doing things with another person who likes the same things and has similar attitudes.

Question 3

Matching hypothesis

Answer 3

The force of similarity also operates at a physical level. We usually seek out someone at our own level of attractiveness in physical characteristics as well as social attributes we addressed previously. Research validates the matching hypothesis, which states that, although we may prefer a more attractive person in the abstract, in the real world we end up choosing someone who is close to our own level of attractiveness.

Question 4

Erikson’s stage: intimacy vs. isolation

Answer 4

In early adulthood, according to Erikson, after individuals are well on their way to establishing stable and successful identities, they enter the sixth developmental stage, which is intimacy versus isolation. Erikson describes intimacy as fi nding oneself while losing oneself in another person, and it requires a commitment to another person. If a person fails to develop an intimate relationship in early adulthood, according to Erikson, isolation results. An inability to develop meaningful relationships with others can harm an individual’s personality. It may lead individuals to repudiate, ignore, or attack those who frustrate them. Such circumstances account for the shallow, almost pathetic attempts of youth to merge themselves with a leader. Many youth want to be apprentices or disciples of leaders and adults who will shelter them from the harm of the “outgroup” world. If this fails—and Erikson points out that it must—sooner or later the individuals recoil into a self-search to discover where they went wrong. This introspection sometimes leads to painful depression and isolation. It also may contribute to a mistrust of others.

Question 5

Intimacy and independence

Answer 5

Development in early adulthood often involves balancing intimacy and commitment on the one hand, and independence and freedom on the other. At the same time as individuals are trying to establish an identity, they face the challenges of increasing their independence from their parents, developing an intimate relationship with another individual, and continuing their friendship commitments. They also face the task of making decisions for themselves without always relying on what others say or do.

The extent to which young adults develop autonomy has important implications for them. For example, young adults who have not suffi ciently moved away from parental ties may have diffi culty in both interpersonal relationships and a career.

Question 6

Gender differences in friendships

Answer 6

As in the childhood and adolescent years, there are gender differences in adult friendship. Compared with men, women have more close friends and their friendships involve more self-disclosure and exchange of mutual support (Dow & Wood, 2006). Women are more likely to listen at length to what a friend has to say and be sympathetic, and women have been labeled as “talking companions” because talk is so central to their relationship (Gouldner & Strong, 1987). Women’s friendships tend to be characterized not only by depth but also by breadth: Women share many aspects of their experiences, thoughts, and feelings (Wood, 2001). When female friends get together, they like to talk, but male friends are more likely to engage in activities, especially outdoors. Thus, the adult male pattern of friendship often involves keeping one’s distance while sharing useful information. Men are less likely than women to talk about their weaknesses with their friends, and men want practical solutions to their problems rather than sympathy (Tannen, 1990). Also, adult male friendships are more competitive than those of women (Wood, 2001).

Question 7

Romantic love

Answer 7

Some friendships evolve into romantic love, which is also called passionate love, or eros. Romantic love has strong components of sexuality and infatuation, and it often predominates in the early part of a love relationship (Berscheid, 2010; Regan, 2008). A complex intermingling of different emotions goes into romantic love—including such emotions as passion fear, anger, sexual desire, joy, and jealousy (Regan, 2008). Well-known love researcher Ellen Berscheid (1988) says that sexual desire is the most important ingredient of romantic love. Obviously, some of these emotions are a source of anguish, which can lead to other issues such as depression.

Question 8

Affectionate love

Answer 8

Love is more than just passion (Berscheid, 2010). Affectionate love, also called companionate love, is the type of love that occurs when someone desires to have the other person near and has a deep, caring affection for the person. The early stages of love have more romantic love ingredients—but as love matures, passion tends to give way to affection.

Question 9

Consummate love

Answer 9

Sternberg proposed a triarchic theory of love in which love can be thought of as a triangle with three main dimensions— passion, intimacy, and commitment. Passion, as described earlier in the romantic love section, is physical and sexual attraction to another. Intimacy relates to the emotional feelings of warmth, closeness, and sharing in a relationship. Commitment is the cognitive appraisal of the relationship and the intent to maintain the relationship even in the face of problems. In Sternberg’s theory, the strongest, fullest form of love is consummate love, which involves all three dimensions (see Figure 14.2). If passion is the only ingredient in a relationship (with intimacy and commitment low or absent), we are merely infatuated. An affair or a f l ing in which there is little intimacy and even less commitment is an example. A relationship marked by intimacy and commitment but low or lacking in passion is called affectionate love, a pattern often found among couples who have been married for many years. If passion and commitment are present but intimacy is not, Sternberg calls the relationship fatuous love, as when one person worships another from a distance. But if couples share all three dimensions—passion, intimacy, and commitment—they experience consummate love (Sternberg & Sternberg, 2010).

Question 10

Single adults

Answer 10

Over a 30-year period, a dramatic rise in the percentage of single adults has occurred.

Advantages of being single include having time to make decisions about one’s life course, time to develop personal resources to meet goals, freedom to make autonomous decisions and pursue one’s own schedule and interests, opportunities to explore new places and try out new things, and privacy.

Common problems of single adults may include forming intimate relationships with other adults, confronting loneliness, and fi nding a niche in a society that is marriage-oriented.

Once adults reach the age of 30, there can be increasing pressure to settle down and get married. This is when many single adults make a conscious decision to marry or to remain single.

Question 11

Cohabiting adults

Answer 11

Cohabitation refers to living together in a sexual relationship without being married. Cohabiting rates are even higher in some countries—in Sweden, cohabitation before marriage is virtually universal (Stokes & Raley, 2009).

Couples who cohabit face certain problems (Popenoe, 2008; Rhoades, Stanley, & Markman, 2009). Disapproval by parents and other family members can place emotional strain on the cohabiting couple. Some cohabiting couples have diffi culty owning property jointly. Legal rights on the dissolution of the relationship are less certain than in a divorce.

Question 12

Marital trends

Answer 12

Recently, there has been a decline in marriage rates.

Is there a best age to get married? Marriages in adolescence are more likely to end in divorce than marriages in adulthood (Waite, 2009). However, researchers have not been able to pin down a specifi c age or age span for getting married in adulthood that is most likely to result in a successful marriage (Furstenberg, 2007).

How happy are people who do marry? The average duration of a marriage in the United States is currently just over nine years. As indicated in Figure 14.5, the percentage of married individuals in the United States who said their marriages were “very happy” declined from the 1970s through the early 1990s, but recently has begun to increase (Popenoe, 2009). Notice in Figure 14.5 that men consistently report being happier in their marriage than women.

Question 13

The benefits of a good marriage

Answer 13

Individuals who are happily married live longer, healthier lives than either divorced individuals or those who are unhappily married.

What are the reasons for these benefi ts of a happy marriage? People in happy marriages likely feel less physically and emotionally stressed, which puts less wear and tear on a person’s body. Such wear and tear can lead to numerous physical ailments, such as high blood pressure and heart disease, as well as psychological problems such as anxiety, depression, and substance abuse.

Question 14

Outlook on midlife

Answer 14

Should midlife and the years beyond be feared by women as bringing the loss of youth and opportunity, a time of decline? Or is it a new prime of life, a time for renewal, for shedding preoccupations with a youthful appearance and body, and for seeking new challenges, valuing maturity, and enjoying change?

In one study, the early fi fties were indeed a new prime of life for many women (Mitchell & Helson, 1990). In the sample of 700 women aged 26 to 80, women in their early fi fties most often described their lives as “fi rstrate.” Conditions that distinguished the lives of women in their early fi fties from those of women in other age periods included more “empty nests,” better health, higher income, and more concern for parents. Women in their early fi fties showed confi dence, involvement, security, and breadth of personality.

In sum, the view that midlife is a negative age period for women is stereotypical, as so many perceptions of age periods are. Midlife is a diversifi ed, heterogeneous period for women, just as it is for men.

Question 15

Big five factors of personality: the theory

Answer 15

A major study of adult personality development continues to be conducted by Paul Costa and Robert McCrae (1998; McCrae & Costa, 2003, 2006). They focus on what are called the Big Five factors of personality, which are openness to experience, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism (emotional stability); OCEAN.

Costa and McCrae concluded that considerable stability occurs in the fi ve personality factors—emotional stability, extraversion, openness, agreeableness, and conscientiousness. However, one study found that conscientiousness continued to develop in late adulthood (Roberts, Walton, & Bogg, 2005), and another study revealed that older adults were more conscientious and agreeable than middle-aged and younger adults (Allemand, Zimprich, & Hendriks, 2008).

Question 16

The big five: Openness

Answer 16

• Imaginative or practical
• Interested in variety or routine
• Independent or conforming

Question 17

The big five: Conscientiousness

Answer 17

• Organized or disorganized
• Careful or careless
• Disciplined or impulsive

Question 18

The big five: Extraversion

Answer 18

• Sociable or retiring
• Fun-loving or somber
• Affectionate or reserved

Question 19

The big five: Agreeableness

Answer 19

• Softhearted or ruthless
• Trusting or suspicious
• Helpful or uncooperative

Question 20

The big five: Neuroticism (emotional stability)

Answer 20

• Calm or anxious
• Secure or insecure
• Self-satisfied or self-pitying

Question 21

The big five: stability and change of personality

Answer 21

Results for extraversion were complex until it was subdivided into social dominance (assertiveness, dominance) and social vitality (talkativeness, sociability). Social dominance increased from adolescence through middle adulthood, whereas social vitality increased in adolescence and then decreased in early and late adulthood.

• Agreeableness and conscientiousness increased in early and middle adulthood.
• Neuroticism decreased in early adulthood.
• Openness to experience increased in adolescence and early adulthood and then decreased in late adulthood.

In general, personality traits changed most during early adulthood.

Question 22

Sibling relationships and friendships

Answer 22

Sibling relationships persist over the entire life span for most adults (Dunn, 2007). Eighty-fi ve percent of today’s adults have at least one living sibling. Sibling rela-tionships in adulthood may be extremely close, apathetic, or highly rivalrous.

The majority of sibling relationships in adulthood are close (Cicirelli, 2009). Those siblings who are psychologically close to each other in adulthood tended to be that way in childhood. It is rare for sibling closeness to develop for the fi rst time in adulthood (Dunn, 1984). A recent study revealed that adult siblings often provide practical and emotional support to each other.

Friendships continue to be important in middle adulthood just as they were in early adulthood (Antonucci, 1989). It takes time to develop intimate friendships, so friendships that have endured over the adult years are often deeper than those that have just been formed in middle adulthood.

Question 23

Grandparent roles and styles

Answer 23

Three prominent meanings are attached to being a grandparent (Neugarten & Weinstein, 1964). For some older adults, being a grandparent is a source of biological reward and continuity. For others, being a grandparent is a source of emotional self-fulfi llment, generating feelings of companionship and satisfaction that may have been missing in earlier adult-child relationships. And for yet others, being a grandparent is a remote role. A recent study revealed that grandparenting can provide a sense of purpose and a feeling of being valued during middle and late adulthood when generative needs are strong (Thiele & Whelan, 2008).

The diversity of grandparenting also was apparent in an early investigation of how grandparents interacted with their grandchildren (Neugarten & Weinstein, 1964). Three styles were dominant—formal, fun-seeking, and distant. In the formal style, the grandparent performed what was considered to be a proper and prescribed role. These grandparents showed a strong interest in their grandchildren, but were careful not to give child-rearing advice.

In the fun-seeking style, the grandparent was informal and playful. Grandchildren were a source of leisure activity; mutual satisfaction was emphasized.

A substantial portion of grandparents were distant fi gures. In the distant-fi gure style, the grandparent was benevolent but interaction was infrequent. Grandparents who were over the age of 65 were more likely to display a formal style of interaction; those under 65 were more likely to display a funseeking style.

Question 24

Language development

Answer 24

In late adulthood, however, some decrements in language may appear (Obler, 2009). Among the most common language-related complaints reported by older adults are diffi culty in retrieving words to use in conversation and understanding spoken language in certain contexts (Clark-Cotton & Goral, 2007). This often involves the tip-of-the-tongue phenomenon , in which individuals are confi dent that they can remember something but just can’t quite seem to retrieve it from memory.

Language does change among individuals with Alzheimer disease, which we will discuss later in the chapter (Obler, 2009). Word-fi nding/generating diffi culties are one of the earliest symptoms of Alzheimer disease, but most individuals with the disease retain much of their ability to produce well-formed sentences until the late stages of the disease. Nonetheless, they do make more grammatical errors than older adults without the disease.

Question 25

Integrity versus despair

Answer 25

Integrity versus despair is Erikson’s eighth and fi nal stage of development, which individuals experience during late adulthood. This stage involves refl ecting on the past and either piecing together a positive review or concluding that one’s life has not been well spent. Through many different routes, the older adult may have developed a positive outlook in each of the preceding periods. If so, retrospective glances and reminiscences will reveal a picture of a life well spent, and the older adult will be satisfi ed (integrity). But if the older adult resolved one or more of the earlier stages in a negative way (being socially isolated in early adulthood or stagnated in middle adulthood, for example), retrospective glances about the total worth of his or her life might be negative (despair).

Question 26

Life review

Answer 26

Life review is prominent in Erikson’s fi nal stage of integrity versus despair. Life review involves looking back at one’s life experiences, evaluating them, interpreting them, and often reinterpreting them. Butler (2007) states that the life review is set in motion by looking forward to death. Sometimes the life review proceeds quietly; at other times it is intense, requiring considerable work to achieve some sense of personality integration. The life review may be observed initially in stray and insignifi cant thoughts about oneself and one’s life history. These thoughts may continue to emerge in brief intermittent spurts or become essentially continuous. Life reviews can include sociocultural dimensions, such as culture, ethnicity, and gender. Life reviews also can include interpersonal, relationship dimensions, including sharing and intimacy with family members or a friend (Cappeliez & O’Rourke, 2006). And life reviews can include personal dimensions, which might involve the creation and discovery of meaning and coherence.

Question 27

Activity theory

Answer 27

Activity theory states that the more active and involved older adults are, the more likely they are to be satisfi ed with their lives. Researchers have found strong support for activity theory. These researchers have found that when older adults are active, energetic, and productive, they age more successfully and are happier than if they disengage from society.

Activity theory suggests that many individuals will achieve greater life satisfaction if they continue their middle-adulthood roles into late adulthood. If these roles are stripped from them (as in early retirement), it is important for them to fi nd substitute roles that keep them active and involved.

Question 28

Socioemotional selectivity theory

Answer 28

Socioemotional selectivity theory states that older adults become more selective about their social networks. Because they place a high value on emotional satisfaction, older adults spend more time with familiar individuals with whom they have had rewarding relationships. Developed by Laura Carstensen (1998, 2006, 2008), this theory states that older adults deliberately withdraw from social contact with individuals peripheral to their lives while they maintain or increase contact with close friends and family members with whom they have had enjoyable relationships. This selective narrowing of social interaction maximizes positive emotional experiences and minimizes emotional risks as individuals become older.

Question 29

Selective optimization with compensation theory

Answer 29

Selective optimization with compensation theory states that successful aging is linked with three main factors: selection, optimization, and compensation (SOC). The theory describes how people can produce new resources and allocate them effectively to the tasks they want to master (Freund & Lamb, 2011; Riediger, Li, & Lindenberger, 2006; Staudinger & Jacobs, 2011). Selection is based on the concept that older adults have a reduced capacity and loss of functioning, which require a reduction in performance in most life domains. Optimization suggests that it is possible to maintain performance in some areas through continued practice and the use of new technologies. Compensation becomes relevant when life tasks require a level of capacity beyond the current level of the older adult’s performance potential. Older adults especially need to compensate in circumstances with high mental or physical demands, such as when thinking about and memorizing new material very fast, reacting quickly when driving a car, or running fast. When older adults develop an illness, the need for compensation is obvious.

Question 30

Personality

Answer 30

Researchers have found that several of the Big Five factors of personality continue to change in late adulthood. For example, in one study conscientiousness continued to develop in late adulthood (Roberts, Walton, & Bogg, 2005), and in another study older adults were more conscientious and agreeable than middle-aged and younger adults (Allemand, Zimprich, & Hendriks, 2008). A longitudinal study of more than 1,200 individuals across seven decades revealed that the Big Five personality factor of conscientiousness predicted higher mortality risk from childhood through late adulthood (Martin, Friedman, & Schwartz, 2007). Another study found that two of the Big Five factors were linked to older adults’ mortality in one study, with low conscientiousness and high neuroticism predicting earlier death.

Affect and outlook on life are also linked to mortality in older adults (Chida & Steptoe, 2008; Mroczek, Spiro, & Griffi n, 2006). Older adults characterized by negative affect don’t live as long as those who display more positive affect, and optimistic older adults who have a positive outlook on life live longer than their counterparts who are more pessimistic and have a negative outlook on life (Levy & others, 2002).

Question 31

Self-esteem

Answer 31

Self-esteem increased in the twenties, leveled off in the thirties and forties, rose considerably in the fi fties and sixties, and then dropped signifi cantly in the seventies and eighties (see Figure 19.5). Through most of the adult years, the self-esteem of males was higher than the self-esteem of females. However, in the seventies and eighties, the self-esteem of males and females converged. Why might self-esteem decline in older adults? Explanations include deteriorating physical health and negative societal attitudes toward older adults, although these factors were not examined in the large-scale study just described. Researchers have found that in late adulthood, being widowed, institutionalized, or physically impaired, having a low religious commitment, and experiencing a decline in health are linked to low self-esteem.

Question 32

Possible selves

Answer 32

Possible selves are what individuals might become, what they would like to become, and what they are afraid of becoming (Hoppmann & Smith, 2007; Markus & Nurius, 1987). Acceptance of ideal and future selves decreases and acceptance of past selves increases in older adults.

Question 33

Self-control

Answer 33

Although older adults are aware of age-related losses, most still effectively maintain a sense of self-control. A recent survey across a range of 21 developed and developing countries revealed that a majority of adults in their sixties and seventies reported being in control of their lives (HSBC Insurance, 2007). In developed countries such as Denmark, the United States, and Great Britain, adults in their sixties and seventies said they had more control over their lives than their counterparts in their forties and fi fties.

Question 34

Accommodating control strategies + assimilative control strategies

Answer 34

The negative effects of age-typical problems, such as a decline in physical and cognitive skills and an increase in illness, may be buffered by a fl exible, accommodating control style. Researchers have found that accommodating control strategies (changing one’s goals to fi t a given circumstance) increase in importance, and assimilative control strategies (changing a situation to meet one’s goals) decrease in importance beginning in middle adulthood.

Question 35

Ageism

Answer 35

Social participation by older adults is often discouraged by ageism, which is prejudice against others because of their age, especially prejudice against older adults (Leifheit-Limson & Levy, 2009). They are often perceived as incapable of thinking clearly, learning new things, enjoying sex, contributing to the community, or holding responsible jobs. Because of their age, older adults might not be hired for new jobs or might be eased out of old ones; they might be shunned socially; and they might be edged out of their family life.

Question 36

Eldercare

Answer 36

Eldercare is the physical and emotional caretaking of older members of the family, whether that care is day-to-day physical assistance or responsibility for arranging and overseeing such care.

Question 37

Generational inequity

Answer 37

Yet another policy issue involving aging is generational inequity, the view that our aging society is being unfair to its younger members because older adults pile up advantages by receiving an inequitably large allocation of resources. Some authors have argued that generational inequity produces intergenerational confl ict and divisiveness in the society at large.

Question 38

Primary emotions

Answer 38

A major body of research on ageing and emotions has been derived in one way or another from differential emotions theory, which is based on the notion that there are a limited number of basic, hard-wired emotion systems that have evolved to deal with emergency situations in a highly automated, safe, and reliable way.

These primary emotion systems involve specific programs for such “negative” emotions as anger, fear, sadness, and disgust, and “positive” emotions such as joy/happiness, love, and interest/surprise.

Question 39

Positive emotional balance

Answer 39

Asalreadynoted,manyresearcherswhocompared younger and older adults by means of self-report assessments of emotions have been impressed with the positive emotional balance of older individuals. Such positive balance reflects a systematic decline in negative emotions throughout the adult lifespan, while positive emotions appear to remain fairly constant. Older individuals also indicate they are better able to control their emotions than are younger individuals, and instead rely on such mechanisms as principalization and reversal. Overall, they indicate better levels of self-control , suggesting that they display high levels of “expertise” in regulating their emotions. The conclusion that older individuals exhibit less physiological reactivity in a variety of emotioninductions(rangingfromthepresentation of short films to recalling autobiographical memories) has been upheld in other studies since, giving support to the conclusion that, overall, elderly individuals are adept at regulating emotional arousal. older individuals appear to selectively process positive emotions to a greater degree than negative emotions, in contrast to younger individuals who process similar levels of positive and negative emotions. For example, they recall relatively fewer negative images compared to positive or neutral images, a bias also shown by recognition memory.

Question 40

Carstensen’s socioemotional selectivity theory

Answer 40

This theory suggests that, faced with limited time to live, older individuals reorganize their goals so as to place greater emphasis on emotions and their regulation. By rearranging their environments so as to optimize emotional functioning and meaning, they are able to maintain positive and decrease negative affect, resulting in overall improved emotion regulation.

Question 41

Age & individual differences in emotion regulation

Answer 41

Two regulation modes, affect-optimization and affectdifferentiation, were defined. As predicted, individuals whoemphasizedpositivehedonictonedisplayed an optimization strategy, while those favoring cognitive–affective complexity adopted differentiation strategies. High optimizers minimize negative feelings; they do not engage in rich exploration of feelings and nonrational processes, tend to ignore unpleasant facts, but also are low in self-doubt. High differentiators tend to analyze their emotions; they are also high in tolerance of ambiguity and low in repression.

Optimizers and differentiators also report different life events (Labouvie-Vief and Marquez, 2004). Optimizers describe their lives as free from major negative life events and turning points, such as emotional problems, loss of friends, experience with severe punishment and/or discrimination, and identity crises. In contrast, those high in cognitive–affective complexity describe their lives as containing major negative experiences such as severe punishment and discrimination, and turning points such as changes in self-concept or spiritual belief.