The One Act Play that Goes Wrong

Question 1

TREVOR: …if anyone finds a Duran Duran…please hand it to me at the end of the performance. Enjoy the show…Clearance.
CHRIS: Leave it. Just leave it.

Answer 1

We need…

Question 2

CHRIS: Leave it. Just leave it.

ANNIE: We need…

CHRIS: We haven’t got time.

Answer 2

Exit

Question 3

DENNIS: Shall I telephone the police, Mr. Colleymoore?
ROBERT: The police? They wouldn’t make it out here for days in this snowstorm (opens curtains)

Answer 3

Snowflakes

Question 4

ROBERT: Hang it all! There’s another on the shelf!
DENNIS: Of course sir! Yes, this one is full! (empty)
ROBERT: This is horrifying! I mean who on earth would have a motivation to murder Charles Haversham?
(Dennis puts empty bottle on tray with a glass and walks past window)

Answer 4

Switch bottles

Question 5

ROBERT: Suicide Cecil? How can you say that? Of course not; it’s murder! Murder in the first degree!
MAX: Nonsense, the man was paranoid, jealous, and I can prove it! Perkins, hand me his journal from the mantelpiece!

Answer 5

Hand journal through window

Question 6

SANDRA: Your eyes send me into a dream! Kiss me Cecil, I can’t wait a second longer!
(Dennis bursts in late w two candlesticks)
DENNIS: Sorry to interrupt again Mr. Haversham, Miss Colleymoore. I’ve just come to prepare the room.
MAX: Thank you Perkins. Put them on the mantelpiece.
(Dennis walks to mantelpiece with the candlesticks)

Answer 6

Hold mantelpiece in position

Question 7

Chris/Sandra scene -
Sandra: What letter?
Chris: Then, how do you explain the letter on the mantelpiece?
Sandra: I didn’t write that letter!
Chris: You wrote that letter!

Answer 7

Pass letter through window

Question 8

Dennis: I don’t know Inspector, I was in here when I heard screams from downstairs!
Robert drags annie on stage
Robert: Get in here now Florence! It’s not safe down there!

Answer 8

Thomas I’m frightened!

Question 9

Dennis: What’s going on?
Chris: Isn’t it obvious? Cecil has lost control?

Answer 9

Ceecil! Surely not!

Question 10

Chris: He killed Charles tonight, driven mad by his lust for you, and now he knows we’ve found him out!

Answer 10

I cannot bear it. Ceecil would not do such a thing.

Question 11

Robert: Of course he would, the damn lunatic!

Answer 11

You used to trust people Tom; you’ve changed!

Question 12

Dennis: This is a fine mess, sir! The worst night I’ve seen in eighty-eight years of service!

Answer 12

Save me brother, save me!

Question 13

Robert: I shan’t let anyone hurt a hair on your head, Florence.

Answer 13

I’m panicking! I can’t believe…Ceecil?

Question 14

You: I can’t believe…Ceecil?
Chris: Cecil!

Answer 14

Cecil…is doing this.

Question 15

Dennis: Try to stay calm Miss Colleymoore!

Answer 15

I shall faint!

Question 16

Chris: Take cover!
Robert: Great scot!
Dennis: Good heavens!

Answer 16

Ay me!

Question 17

Ay me
Chris: Don’t panic! Cecil’s crossing the landing!

Answer 17

We must lock him out!

Question 18

Chris: Quickly Perkins, hand them to me before Cecil…
(Max enters, dead)
Good lord!

Answer 18

Cecil’s dead?

Question 19

Trevor: Found the Duran Duran’, carry on
Chris: Time of death: quarter to midnight

Answer 19

Cecil! No! No! No! I loved him! I loved him! I know it’s wrong. I know I was engaged to Charles; but Cecil was mine and…I was his. I loved him!

Question 20

I loved him!
Dennis: There, there, Miss Colleymoore.

Answer 20

Through tears. How will I go on?

Question 21

Dennis: That’s a good question Mr. Colleymoore.
Chris: …and one we need to answer quickly if we all want to get out of this house alive.

Answer 21

Oh inspector, you’ve given me a chill!

Question 22

Dennis pours the spirit for Robert.
Chris: Not, tell me, is there anyone you know of still in the grounds other than the four of us?

Answer 22

Not a soul.

Question 23

Robert: The staff all go home at the weekends, except for Perkins of course. Good god, I needed that.
Chris: Does anyone else have access to the grounds?

Answer 23

No one, inspector.

Question 24

Pole disaster with max.
Chris: So, let us go over the facts
hint: go to window during this

Answer 24

Oh! It’s such a terrible night!

Question 25

Chris: Florence! You were engaged to be married to Charles, a man who according to your letter you despised. Not only this but you were having an affair with his brother-

Answer 25

Cecil!

Question 26

Chris: …Cecil. It seems plausible to me that you both murdered him so you could be together.

Answer 26

Oh! Stop it inspector! Cecil’s dead too now and I certainly didn’t kill Charles

Question 27

Jonathan: I told Perkins! We’ve been working together all along. ever since we last spoke at the police station it was clear you thought I was onto you. It was at this point I became afraid you’d try to kill me. For months now I’ve had my guard up and tonight you fell into my trap.
Dennis: You’ve been hiding in the grounds ever since this afternoon when you planted the poison
(get up when you hear this line)

Answer 27

I thought it was strange you got here so quickly in such terrible weather

Question 28

Dennis: And then you found Charles’ will in his ledger and tried to pin the whole thing on me.

Answer 28

You damned crafty devil

Question 29

Jonathan: Crafty, indeed. Perkins here is as innocent as I am. Remove those handcuffs this instant!
Drop the gun inspector!

Answer 29

Ay me!

Question 30

Dennis: Yes, sir (leaves with chaise lounge)
Jonathan: Lower your weapon, inspector. It’s over.

Answer 30

Please inspector! You’re frightening me!

Question 31

You’re frightening me…
Chris: You ought to be frightened!

Answer 31

You monster! You tried to kill Charles…

Question 32

Robert: It’s true. I’m the inspector’s accomplice; I helped him move the money!
Sandra: Brother! I’m surprised at…

Answer 32

Brother, I’m surprised at you! I don’t know what you’ve become.

Question 33

Chris (whisper): As for Cecil…
Robert: As for Cecil, that was more a crime of passion, simple as that.

Answer 33

Cecil! But I loved him, he was my only…

Question 34

Dennis: Yes, sir!
Jonathan: Now, I hold in my hand a written list of every fraudulent transaction Thomas Colleymoore and Inspector Carter made!
Sandra: This can’t be true, I won’t believe…

Answer 34

This can’t be true. I won’t believe it! I can’t believe it!

Question 35

Jonathan: Your sordid affair sickened me Florence. You broke my heart.

Answer 35

No, Charley! You mustn’t! I made a mistake…

Question 36

Sandra: I made a mistake! Please, take me back! I’ll be yours all over again!
Jonathan: Take back a woman who has betrayed me (being spun)? Never!

Answer 36

CHARLEY! You’re all I have! Love me! Please! Don’t cast me aside! I shall be an outcast in the town! My friend’s shan’t speak to me. Never again shall I feel your embrace! Let me be your wife!

Question 37

Dennis: yes, sir!!
Jonathan: That will be the police to arrest you both.

Answer 37

Charley! I cannot bear it another second…

Question 38

Jonathan: Silence Florence! You are nothing to me now!
Sandra: this is the worst night of my life (punched!!)

Answer 38

No! No! No! This is the worst night of my life!

Question 39

Robert: What do you mean?
Jonathan:…He never intended to share the money with you! Let me summarize…

Answer 39

I LOVE YOU CHARLEY!

Question 40

Inspector Carter knew I discovered you and he were both embezzling police money, so you hatched a
(tray action)

Answer 40

I’ve still got the ring Charley, we can make it work!

Question 41

Jonathan:…Cecil and Florence because of their affair until your accomplice Thomas blundered in and shot my brother Cecil. Carter then tried to pin it on Perkins instead after finding my will in the ledger.
(roll of tape)

Answer 41

Take me Charley! If you know what’s good for you!

Question 42

CHRIS: I had’t bargained on your accountant catching on this quickly and telephoning you so soon.

Answer 42

Back onstage