Terminology

Question 1

Agreement/Alignment

Answer 1

Is a context in which everyone is going to same place. Alignment is a context in which everyone is coming from the same source”

Question 2

listening bias

Answer 2

When you already decided that you know how somethings going to go it’s a pre-existing beliefs and interpretations that shape, color and influence the way people experience people, circumstances, and themselves
- Body language rolling your eyes
- That little voice in your head, the voice of your imagination, and the interpretations its constantly making

Question 3

Aliveness

Answer 3

An occurrence when you get yourself in the game instead of spectate, and the big I takes over the little I
- you’re aware what you are doing at that moment you experience a sense of presence with yourself the big I

Question 4

At effect.

Answer 4

To be a victim of circumstance or to depend upon them for success. “at the effect of [some circumstance]”
The Newtonian model of reality I am because of that, the quantum model of reality I am that - that exist because of me on

Question 5

Authenticity.

Answer 5

When one is being consistent with how they portray themselves to others that is in alignment with their core values.

Question 6

Breakthrough.

Answer 6

When your free from a limitation, it allows you to leap in performance and quality of life
- When “the light bulb clicks on in your head” and you “get it” and it causes a discrete change in behavior

Question 7

Breakdown.

Answer 7

When things don’t go as expected A breakdown happens when some possibility, intention or commitment is frustrated, stopped or thwarted, or when you don’t do as you said you would – “not keeping your word” – , also known as a loss of integrity, a loss of workability

Question 8

Complete

Answer 8

When one is complete with any aspect of the past and therefore the past has no constraint on who one is being or how they are acting in the present. In communication, being complete is one being left with no lingering resentments, regrets or “unfinished business.

Question 9

Cost.

Answer 9

(as used in Rackets. The impact of one’s reactive ways of being and acting. The costs of rackets are love/affinity, vitality/well-being, self-expression, and satisfaction/fulfillment, all of which fall under aliveness.

Question 10

Change.

Answer 10

(versus transformation). Change begins with something that is made different in distance (from here to there), time (from now to then) or form (for example, from a square to a circle). An aspect of the nature of change is that change causes the persistence of the something being changed.
Change is a gradual continual shift.

Question 11

Transformation.

Answer 11

The invention of a new realm of possibility for yourself and your life. is a discrete jump. A caterpillar transforms into a moth or butterfly, but the metamorphosis that happens in the cocoon is change. Improvement and evolution are in the world of change. Transformation is about something new, different, a creation. Change = a+1 , Transformaton = before was A, now is B. AnyTDorH

Question 12

Choosing vs Deciding

Answer 12

Deciding is related to other “*cide” words (suicide, insecticide, genocide), and is the result of applying reason to eliminate alternatives, effectively killing them. Usually a single thing is left and that becomes the decision.
Choosing is about making a choice purely for the sake of choosing, not applying reason, not applying logic, not removing or disqualifying the other choices. Everyone likes to use reason, but ultimately, at the bottom of every decision or proofs, is either fundamental choice or reason: “I choose to believe …” or “I choose to trust …” adding “because” makes it a reason. By using reason, one then absolves oneself from responsibility for the choice, it becomes the fault of the reason or the reasoning process if it fails. Choice demands responsibility for making the choice

Question 13

Clearing

Answer 13

Clearing The most common analogy is of a field, and removing the stories, beliefs, Concepts whatever obstacles are in the way, that interfere with functionality and wellbeing to create a space where possibilities can be created. The clearing is like a vacuum, and can draw things towards it. If “I’m no good” is in the clearing you will draw “I’m no good”. If you want the possibility of contribution to the world to be in your clearing, to draw that possibility and opportunity, then you need to remove the “I’m no good” thing from your clearing

Question 14

Box theory/Context.

Answer 14

is your occurring world; the total of how the world around you, and the people and things in it show up for you. Nearly all context in which humans live is created. As a “meaning-making machine”, it forms the setting and the background of your story and you tend to take actions based upon it in response. And you take it for granted and don’t realize it: the one thing your occurring world doesn’t automatically occur for you as is context. For example, for a fish, water is a major part of his context. A fish has no appreciation of water, it’s just there, life consists of dealing with it all the time, he ‘swims in it’. No other fish has ever been out of water for any length of time and come back to tell him what it’s like, so the fish doesn’t know anything but water, and nothing else is possible to him. (The difference is, the fish’s context of water is beneficial to him, and he can’t overcome it and survive. You, however, might “swim in” a context that isn’t altogether beneficial to you, and that you can overcome. By contrast, responsibility is an empowering context.) When your life sucks, when you’re in a negative or disempowering context; the way to break out of it, to overcome the negative or disempowering context, is to distinguish something (see Distinguish, Distinction). Then you can see your disempowering story as a story, and take new action in alignment with reality; or take on one or more new ways of being that might work better for you.

Question 15

Distinction.

Answer 15

Distinction. A distinction is a linguistic phenomenon that brings something into being as a presence, for which previously there was no presence. grantlam
The idea of a distinction comes from Taoism, when you name something as beautiful, not beautiful comes into existence as well. It also comes from sublanguages created to facilitate an area of thought or information – the example of physics used above. A distinction is simply a term, a word, used to name something to facilitate the abstraction, discussion and/or use of that thing

Question 16

Distinguish.

Answer 16

Distinguish. To take something from an undifferentiated background and bring it to the foreground.

Question 17

Empty.

Answer 17

Empty. Not real, made up, no substance. Generally used in conjunction with “meaningless”
as in “empty and meaningless” see “meaningless” below.

Question 18

Enrollment.

Answer 18

Enrollment. A kind of sharing that causes a new possibility to be present for another such that they are touched moved and inspired by that new possibility. This is not to be confused with Registration

Question 19

Force. (versus power

Answer 19

Access to the distinction between force vs. power, lies in the outcome, the result. Power produces

outcomes that will fall into place without a whole lot of resistance, and that once in place will stay in place indefinitely. Force can produce outcomes, but force nearly always meets with resistance. Force frequently produces outcomes other than what the person applying the force wants, or had in mind. Force produces unintended consequences. No one likes being forced, after all, and most anyone will seek ways to thwart whatever or whoever is trying to force something on them. And when force produces an outcome at all, that outcome will stay in place only for as long as the force can continue to be applied effectively. Once the force goes away, or is removed, or is met with an opposing force; once someone who is unhappy with the outcome produced by force comes up with a way to get around the force, or force back, or to evade the punishment that it threatens, the outcome produced by force is going to unravel. Power is, by its nature, successful. Force, by its nature, isn’t successful, and certainly isn’t powerful. Access to power lies in force-free communication.

Question 20

I

Answer 20

What people tend to think of, in its capacity as an identity, as being a collection of
characteristics, attributes, and experiences from the past.

Question 21

Identity.

Answer 21

A story that we invented about ourselves. The process of inventing an identity began in childhood, as we gradually adopted ways of being and acting to deal successfully with things that didn’t quite go the way we thought they should.

Question 22

Informative learning.

Answer 22

Learning that increases what people know and adds to their skills by bringing new knowledge to an existing worldview and frame of reference. Compare to transformative learning

Question 23

Integrity.

Answer 23

a state or condition of being whole, perfect, complete and unimpaired, in perfect condition. For a person, integrity is a matter of a person’s word. The extent to which who you are reflects the person you intend to be.The more workable, the more integrity, the less workable, there is a loss of integrity. Keeping ones word is associated with integrity – agreeing with common usageNot keeping your word, means you were inauthentic about your word. Inauthenticity leads to unreliability, which reduces workability which can lead to incompleteness, which reduces workability. Thus a lack of integrity, a loss of integrity, or simply, no integrity

Question 24

Life,

Answer 24

as in “yourself and your life.” Our entire set of relationships with people

Question 25

Listening

Answer 25

a state of being. In this regard, the qualifying statements are similar to “… in your listening”. This state of being is recognized as providing a coloration to your listening to what others are saying, and to what is happening around you, even if no sound is hitting your ears. It is the application of interpretation, and the recognition that we are always applying some sort of interpretation to our sensory input.

By recognizing that we are applying color, and the color that is being applied, we can then choose that coloration. The state of being is referred to as “your clearing”, and that clearing provides the coloration, the interpretation, and the responses produced.

Question 26

Meaningless

Answer 26

The absence of inherent meaning.
Used in conjunction with “empty” as in “empty and meaningless”. This sentiment comes from Ecclesiastes. Meaning is the association of things with other things. This is an action of interpretation, of creating “story”. Since it is made up, it is not real, and therefore empty. People tend to use “meaning” to ascribe substance and value to something. But since the meaning is made up, empty, it is really meaningless, without substance, and thus subject to change, alteration, transformation, or disappearance.

Question 27

Occur

Answer 27

Used in the plural form, as in “how it occurs …”, in an active form “occurring” and in the past tense “how it occurred …” . The interpretation of something. Occurring applies story, reason, to what happened, or to how you think about something. Occurring is a subconscious summarization and associative process that hits the conscious mind as real, as truth. It is difficult to recognize this without training. Someone yelling at you could occur as they being angry; or you thinking they think you are deaf, or stupid; or as an urgent notification of something you need to pay attention to; or something else. Thus when trying to describe what happened, you may include that interpretation unknowingly, when it is really how it occurred to you

Question 28

Pay Off

Answer 28

something one gets out of certain ways of being and acting that is not immediately obvious

Question 29

Possibility.

Answer 29

A phenomenon in language that creates a new future now

Question 30

Power

Answer 30

The rate at which an intention is turned into a result

Question 31

Rackets

Answer 31

A persistent complaint combined with a fixed way of being. Rackets are maintained because of payoffs (see payoff) and persist until dropping the racket (and thus its associated cost) is chosen.

Question 32

Reality

Answer 32

That which is real either independently of language (e.g., a car) and that which is real only in language

Question 33

Reason

Answer 33

An excuse we invent to justify choices we make. That would be w:Ambrose Bierce’s definition. When choices are made according to “reasons,” they are distinguished as the “machine” operating, based on assumptions about truth and reality. Genuine choice operates on another level. Reasoning is not denied, but distinguished as rooted in our stories about reality.

Question 34

Reasonable.

Answer 34

To justify acting or not acting based on reasons and justifications.

Question 35

Resentment.

Answer 35

A poison people swallow hoping it will kill the other person.

Answer 36

Responsibility. “Responsibility begins with the willingness to take the stand that one is cause in the matter of one’s life. It is a declaration not an assertion, that is, it is a context from which one chooses to live. Responsibility is not burden, fault, praise, blame, credit, shame or guilt. In responsibility, there is no evaluation of good or bad, right or wrong. There is simply what’s so, and the stand you choose to take on what’s so. Being responsible starts with the willingness to deal with a situation from the view of life that you are the generator of what you do, what you have and what you are. That is not the truth. It is a place to stand. No one can make you responsible, nor can you impose responsibility on another. It is a grace you give yourself – an empowering context that leaves you with a say in the matter of life.”

Question 37

Speaking into the listening.

Answer 37

Effectively communicating to another such that the communication is heard in the way in which the speaker intended.

Question 38

Stinginess.

Answer 38

Deliberately holding oneself and one’s contribution ‘close to the vest’ and without generosity.

Question 39

Story.

Answer 39

is an account or interpretation of past events often mistakenly taken for what actually happened.

Question 40

Strong suit.

Answer 40

A way of being and acting one relies on to produce results and make it in life. Grantlam (discuss * contribs) 01:32, 23 September 2016 (UTC) Also called a “winning formula” or “winning way.” –Abd (d

Question 41

Superstition.

Answer 41

The system of ideas, beliefs, social and cultural assumptions, and taken-for- granted conclusions, etc., through which an individual interprets and interacts with the world, other people, and himself or herself.

Question 42

Transformation

Answer 42

Transformation. The invention of a new realm of possibility for yourself and your life.
The invention of the realm is a necessary condition, but not sufficient for transformation. Without resultant new actions in alignment with the possibilities populating the realm, the invention is just a mental exercise.

Question 43

Transformative learning.

Answer 43

Transformative learning, gives people an awareness of the basic structures in which one knows, thinks, and acts in the world. From that awareness comes a fundamental shift that leaves people more fully in accord with their own possibilities and those of others. Grantlam (discuss * contribs) 01:32, 23 September 2016 (UTC)
Transformative learning is contrasted with Informational Learning. Informational learning increases knowledge and ability. Transformative learning results in new perspectives and new abilities (and sometimes disabilities). The common example is of learning to ride a bicycle. Very little information is provided, like “pedal”. Suddenly the learner gets balance and is able to ride the bike without help. They have discovered it for themselves, and may never lose the ability to ride a bike. The experience, the learning, transforms the person, their perspective and their abilities. Before they couldn’t, now they can. And, a whole new world or realm of possibilities is opened up.

Question 44

Unreasonable

Answer 44

. Not to be mistaken for irrational, going beyond one’s reasons, justifications and considerations to act on something one is committed to.

Question 45

Unreasonable Request.

Answer 45

A request that requires one to go beyond one’s reasons, justifications and considerations to act on something one is committed

Question 46

Vicious circle

Answer 46

The human tendency to collapse what happened with the story we tell about what happened.The story creates a clearing, a listening, for that which supports the story, resulting in more occurrences of things that further support the story, forming a self supporting vicious circle.

Question 47

What happened.

Answer 47

Consensual reality, “objective,” aside from judgment, blame, right/wrong, good/bad, and other forms of “meaning.” What happens occurs to us as it is analyzed by the Already Always Listening to be good/bad, etc. If my ex-wife told me she had a problem with what I’ve done, that’s what happened. If I say that she was unreasonable, that’s my story about it, not what happened. See also Story