Scene 1

Question 1

Scene start:

Answer 1

But she’s a prostitute!

Question 2

She’s not a prostitute, she’s, you know, a call girl.

Answer 2

That’s not a call girl, Monica, a call girl doesn’t hang out on sunset boulevard. That’s a hooker, she’s a hooker.

Question 3

But she’s not into it. She’s new at it.

Answer 3

He doesn’t know that. Why would a guy who looked like that have to pick up a hooker in the first place?

Question 4

He was lost, remember?

Answer 4

Bullshit.

Question 5

He was. Don’t you remember? That’s why she got with him.

Answer 5

Give me a break. A guy who looks like that, with the kind of money he had, he could have anybody, why would he want a hooker from the streets?

Question 6

Because she was beautiful.

Answer 6

Uch, did you think she was beautiful?

Question 7

Yes!

Answer 7

With that awful wig? She wasn’t beautiful.

Question 8

But that’s the thing. He could tell she was really beautiful.

Answer 8

Not when he picked her up in the car he couldn’t. How could he? The girl she was with was more attractive.

Question 9

Did you think so? Uch, I didn’t think so at all.

Answer 9

It didn’t make any sense to me why he would go for her.

Question 10

God Libby, where’s your imagination? Where’s your sense of romance?

Answer 10

I don’t see what’s so romantic about picking up a prostitute who could give you AIDS, letting her live in your hotel room with you.

Question 11

God, Libby, it’s a movie, it’s not real life.

Answer 11

I know it’s a movie, Monica.

Question 12

Of code in real life you’d have to ask questions, but it’s a movie.

Answer 12

I can’t believe you saw it so many times. How many times did you see it?

Question 13

I don’t even know anymore. I bought the tape for 14.99? I leave it in my VCR. Every night I watch a little venue I go to sleep.

Answer 13

I don’t believe you! Every night?

Question 14

So? Don’t you look at a book since times before you go to sleep?

Answer 14

Yeah, but not the same book every night.

Question 15

It helps me fall asleep, okay? I love this movie. I can’t believe you didn’t love it.

Answer 15

Don’t take it so personal; we’re gonna be together the next five nights and six days, you shouldn’t take it so personal.

Question 16

I’m not. I’m sorry you didn’t like it.

Answer 16

It’s only a movie, you know . . .

Question 17

I know.

Answer 17

. . . It’s not the end of the world.

Question 18

I know. Maybe cause you saw it on a plane.

Answer 18

Monica, I wouldn’t have like it even if I saw it Radio City.

Question 19

How could you tell if you liked something on a plane? . . . Don’t you think he’s sexy? You don’t? I can’t believe you don’t think he’s sexy.

Answer 19

He’s all right.

Question 20

All right? He’s gorgeous. Don’t you think he looks a little like Mike?

Answer 20

Like Mike? Are you kidding?

Question 21

No?

Answer 21

He looks nothing like Mike.

Question 22

How can you say that? Mike is gorgeous.

Answer 22

Mike is very good looking but he’s not gorgeous, I wouldn’t call Mike gorgeous. You always had this thing for Mike. I don’t get it.

Question 23

Oh, God, when he gets close to me to give me something to type? I feel like my heart is making so much noise he can hear me and I get embarrassed. I love the way he smells. Aramis he wears.

Answer 23

How do you know?

Question 24

My brother wears it. What’s his story do you think?

Answer 24

Mike?

Question 25

Yeah. You don’t think he’s gay or anything.

Answer 25

Mike? No.

Question 26

I mean, any man that dresses that good . . .

Answer 26

Mike is not gay.

Question 27

You sure?

Answer 27

I’m sure. Believe me, I’m sure.

Question 28

Uh huh. What’s that mean?

Answer 28

What’s what?

Question 29

What it just said. The way you said it, what do you mean?

Answer 29

Nothing.

Question 30

You said it like you know something.

Answer 30

Monica, will you stop analyzing everything I say and do?

Question 31

Tell me. How do you know so much about Mike? You’ve been in the office less than I have.

Answer 31

I don’t know, I just know.

Question 32

Libby . . .

Answer 32

(beat) He came on to me, okay.

Question 33

You’re kidding me.

Answer 33

No.

Question 34

When?

Answer 34

Before the Christmas party.

Question 35

Before? Where?

Answer 35

By the Xerox.

Question 36

You’re kidding me.

Answer 36

Un-uh. (Nuh-uh but hummed)

Question 37

You were in the Xerox room with Mike?

Answer 37

Uh huh.

Question 38

What were you doing?

Answer 38

Xeroxing.

Question 39

And he came in?

Answer 39

Uh huh.

Question 40

Just the two of you?

Answer 40

Yeah. Well, Carmen was there too. She was collating but she left.

Question 41

So it was just you and Mike?

Answer 41

Uh huh.

Question 42

I’m dying. I can’t believe you didn’t tell me this.

Answer 42

I didn’t want to upset you. I know you have this thing for Mike.

Question 43

You’re right, you were smart, it’s a good thing. So what happened?

Answer 43

The Xerox started eating paper.

Question 44

Yeah? So what did you do?

Answer 44

We fixed it.

Question 45

You and Mike?

Answer 45

Uh huh.

Question 46

Together?

Answer 46

Yeah. You know, I pulled out the thing, he pulled out the paper.

Question 47

And?

Answer 47

And he asked me what I was doing for vacation.

Question 48

He did? So what did you tell him?

Answer 48

I told him I was going to the Caribbean with you.

Question 49

Oh, God, you told him you were going with me?

Answer 49

Christ, Monica, calm down.

Question 50

I’m sorry. So what he say?

Answer 50

He says, “Oh, that’s nice.”

Question 51

He did?

Answer 51

Something like that. And then he asked me what I was doing New Years.

Question 52

You’re kidding me.

Answer 52

No.

Question 53

Mike asked you what you were doing New Year’s? You mean Mike isn’t seeing anyone? Don’t you think if he asked you what you were doing New Years that means he was free?

Answer 53

I don’t know maybe he just wanted to know.

Question 54

Why would he want to know something like that?

Answer 54

Maybe he was just curious, I don’t know. Do you want me to tell you this or not?

Question 55

Yes yes yes, I’m sorry. So anyway go on. He asked you what you were doing New Years and . . .

Answer 55

I said we were flying home on the first.

Question 56

Yeah . . . ?

Answer 56

And he said, “That’s too bad.” He and Ed McCarthy are throwing a party.

Question 57

Oh. Ed McCarthy from Accounting?

Answer 57

I guess.

Question 58

How come I didn’t know about this party?

Answer 58

I don’t know, I didn’t either.

Question 59

Yeah, but he told you. He practically invited you.

Answer 59

But I couldn’t go. I was going here with you.

Question 60

Yeah but nobody told me. How come nobody invited me?

Answer 60

I don’t understand you. We’re on our way to the Caribbean. What do you care about this stupid party?

Question 61

I don’t. I’m only saying isn’t this interesting. I’m glad we’re not gonna be there, aren’t you?

Answer 61

It doesn’t matter to me one way or the other, Monica, I don’t care about the stupid party.

Question 62

I know, you’re right. Uh! I can’t wait till we’re sitting in the sun, right?

Answer 62

I know. Me neither.

Question 63

I cannot wait..

Answer 63

Please, God, let there be sex.