Play Lines Flashcards
And speaking of messed up, we must now investigate the origin of that queen! Because long before she was the queen, she was a little girl named Little Red-Cap.
Little Red-Cap?
Yeah, Little Red-Cap.
Isn’t it Little Red Riding Hood?
Okay, first of all, you’re not a hood just because you wear red, all right? Not everyone who wears red is in a gang. And second, that’s what it says here in the book, and we’re going by the book, so you’re Little Red-Cap.
Fine. Jerk.
(Fine. Jerk.)
What?
I didn’t say anything.
(I didn’t say anything.)
So, Little Red-Cap–
Well I’m off to my Grandmother’s house to give her these sweets I made.
sad grandma lines …if only someone loved me. I’m dying. Ack.
Boy, Grandma really knows how to turn on the guilt. I guess I’ll just have to go into the dark and scary woods alone. Although that doesn’t sound like a very good idea.
Don’t go in there!
Thank you.
–first–
I guess I’ll go into the woods.
(I guess I’ll go into the woods.)
Don’t go in there!
–second–
La la la
Aw no it’s a wolf!
La la la
Quit singing and turn your head! There is a wolf! Behind you!
It’s so dark here. If only I could see what was going on.
Wolf pounces, kick backwards, beat wolf with baton, can of mace
kicked wolf, beat with baton, can of mace
Give me your money!
You see, Little Red-Cap was raised in the hood, which is where she gets her other name. And it was a tough hood. A very tough hood.
You got dirt on my shoe!
(You got dirt on my shoe!)
No I didn’t!
Yes you did you–sheep.
Please don’t kill me.
You’re not worth it. Tra la la.
And he lay in wait for Little Red.
Uh-oh.
That’s right, you better keep on walking! Tra la la. Now to deliver these sweets to Grandma’s house to get her off my back.knocks Grandma?
Uh-oh. Don’t go in there. That ain’t your Grandma.
I brought the sweets you ordered. Low-fat, just like you said. Say, you look a little weird.
Most old people look weird. Please come closer.
Don’t go in there! Don’t do it!
Why is there blood all over the floor?
Why aren’t you listening to these fine people?
Why do you have a big wolf-like snout with jagged sharp teeth and beady red eyes? Why am I so stupid I can’t figure this out?
Well, let me just slice open his stomach like I do to every wolf I knock out. What the heck is this?
What’s up?
Well, what are we gonna do with this wolf?
I’ve got an idea! We stuff the wolf’s belly with rocks and then sew him back up. Then when he wakes up, he’ll feel really full, and when he tries to drink out of the river, we can push him in! The weight of the stones will force him to the bottom, so he’ll drown, and the last thing he’ll see if my face. And then he shall know that my revenge is complete.
But her daughter was stolen and raised by a needy old Grandmother.
I need you!
I have a terrible attitude because I was raised in the hood, but I’m still going to bring you sweets! In comes wolf Ah, a wolf!
What do you want?
To eat you! (To grandma)
Hello Grandma! You look messed up!
I don’t say bad things about you! I’m going to eat you!
Ah! Dang it!
Ah a wolf! Die die die die! Hey look a girl popped out of his stomach!
Woo hoo! Let’s kill this wolf by filling his stomach with rocks!
