Mom/Devil Flashcards
BILLIE: I know - look, the concept of hate……..but I did steal the RAM and your fans from Dads work computer so we only really have a couple hours before he realizes they’re missing…
MOM: Billie!! We’re going to the library after we drop your sister off at soccer practice. Get those books to return and come downstairs - we’re leaving!
CHOREBOT - ….Billie would never do this. Right? Oh who do I turn to in moments of profound moral and philosophical disruption such as these?
DEVIL: Come on…please let me at em.
CHOREBOT: what? Who’s there?
DEVIL: oh come on, just a few inches and I’ll be there, fulfilling my one true purpose.
CHOREBOT: What purpose? What are you talking about?
DEVIL: That fly, there…right there! I can’t wait to get him under my mesh, snuffing him out in just a mere matter of seconds -
ANGEL: Wait!!! No, please don’t listen to him. Spare it, spare the poor creature.
DEVIL: oh THIS guy!
ANGEL: Don’t move any closer to it, can’t you see it’s just minding its own business?
DEVIL: Yeah, and I’m just minding mine! (Devil tried to reach for the fly, but it buzzes away) Damn - missed it! Thanks a lot, dickhead.
ANGEL: Whatever do you mean? I did nothing!
DEVIL: You distracted me!
ANGEL: Why were you chorebot! Feagments if you, sure, but you nonetheless!
DEVIL: Yeah, you know, you got your most base urges, your darkest desires, impulses…
ANGEL: and your moral compass and conscience!
DEVIL: Let’s cut the small talk and get back to business, let me at that fly!
CHOREBOT: yes, yes the fly…what did you mean our “one true purpose?” What do you intend to have me do?
DEVIL: Swat ‘em, Squish em! Kill em dead!
CHOREBOT: taking the life of the fly? Billie my creator would never have me do such a thing. It wasn’t even in the list of chores provided to me!
DEVIL: Hate to break it to ya, but I know a fly swatter when I see one. Just go on, try it. Aren’t you just a little bit curious about what it feels like?
CHOREBOT: well of course, all things are curious to me. I e experienced so little of the world…and with each passing moment I become increasingly aware of just how little I know. How could my creator
DEVIL: look, I’ve learned not to ask too many questions - just do what feels right. And doesn’t swinging that hand through the air and obliterating that fly sound like music to your ears?
ANGEL: please, you weren’t made to kill chorebot! Not to take the life of so small and innocent a creature!
DEVIL: kill it!!!! Squish him so it!!!! Etc etc etc
CHOREBOT: I wear the fly swatter I forged in life…mesh by mesh, fly by fly.
ANGEL AND DEVIL: This is the cost of living dear creature. For as much as we wish to do no harm, ours is a world where actions have consequences beyond what we can see, and suffering and happiness come in equal fistfuls.
CHOREBOT: I don’t know that I can bear so much within me.
ANGEL AND DEVIL: ah dear one. You must. For we all must. It is what it means to be alive.
