Mary-Beth Flashcards
SAM
Just write a list of the stuff you want me to know and I’ll do the same. That way we
never have to meet ever again. Okay!?
( MARY-BETH incredibly sarcastic)
MARY-BETH
But I was so looking forward to cliff diving into the deep of who Samantha Jaeger really
is. And now you’re telling me I’m gonna be deprived of that? I don’t know what I’m gonna do. I guess I’ll just have to settle for what is and will always be- the surface.
(SAM overly aggravated and confused)
SAM What are you even saying!?-
MARY-BETH puts her ear buds back in and motions as if she can’t hear SAM.
SAM
Can we just both agree that you are the weirdest person in the entire world!
(MARY-BETH motioning to SAM that she can’t hear her over her music.)
MARY-BETH
You’re gonna have to speak up?
SAM
You think this whole anti-social emo thing is cool huh!? You actually think you’re fooling
someone!? Clearly you’re using this “I’m a loner and I don’t care what anyone thinks,” attitude as a cover up for the truth!
MARY-BETH
Oh Yasss Samantha! In all of your infinite wisdom please enlighten me!
SAM
You act like you don’t care about what anyone thinks of you! And that’s total BO-LOG-
NA!
MARY-BETH
Wait. What’s BO-LOG-NA?
SAM
Meat!
MARY-BETH
Oh, I think you mean Bologna-
SAM
ANYWAY! You swear like you don’t care what anyone thinks of you, yet you try super
hard to show how different you are from everyone else!
(MARY-BETH a little defensive)
MARY-BETH
Oh yeah?
SAM
Yasss! You go out of your way to make everyone who talks to you feel awkward because
you feel awkward in your own skin! And the reason!? You have no friends and no one likes you! No shade! Just truth! (BEAT) Fronting doesn’t work well as a cover-up. I go to MAC for my foundation. You should try it!
For once MARY-BETH has nothing to say. She looks very uncomfortable and embarrassed. MARY-BETH could easily start tearing up. (Not MARY-BETH’s style though.) MARY-BETH tries to hide her hurt by putting her earphones back in.
MARY-BETH focuses on listening to her music.
take out buds
MARY-BETH
What are you doing!?-
SAM
What are you even listening to!? Some evil heavy metal screamo emo crap?
MARY-BETH
There’s no such thing as evil heavy metal screamo emo crap! And if there was!? Sign me
up cuz that sounds freakin AWESOME!!
SAM
I DON’T LIKE YOU!
MARY-BETH
(yelling)
Make sure you put that on your list! Along with, Mary-Beth thinks I’m a shallow superficial robot playing my part in an artificially materialistic society!
SAM
Freak!
MARY-BETH
Fake!
SAM
Loner!
MARY-BETH
Loathed!
knock/pick up phone
SAM
I’m sorry-
MARY-BETH
(embarrassed but keeping up guard)
My screen was already broken.
SAM
You listen to the Neighborhood?!
MARY-BETH
(defensive)
Yeah, do you have something to say about that? Give me my phone.
SAM
Yeah I do. (BEAT) I love them.
MARY-BETH
bursts into laughter at the thought of that
(mocking)
BO-LOG-NA.
