Lesson 1

Question 1

Negotiation

Answer 1

Negotiation is not a battle. It’s a process of better relating to people in all kinds of circumstances.

Question 2

Common enemies

Answer 2

Common enemies bond people. In business, find the common enemies relevant to your discussion and leverage those to create a point of connection. Show how your proposal helps solve those issues.

Question 3

Be persistent

Answer 3

In negotiation, persistence is key. Keep finding ways to get more information and unlock new value levers for both parties. Your persistence will pay off in the long run.

Question 4

Emotions > rationality

Answer 4

As much as economists want us to believe that people are hyper-rational actors that consider all angles of every decision they make, they’re not. Most of the things we do are because of some feeling we have, not because we have weighed the rationality of a particular course. More often than not, we rationalize our decisions after they’ve been made.

Question 5

Value the other person

Answer 5

Listen to and value the other party. It will improve your outcomes.

Question 6

What’s going on with the other person?

Answer 6

Your outcomes will be improved once you start thinking from the other person’s perspective. What are their needs or fears? How are they approaching the situation? These are critical pieces of information for any successful negotiation.

Question 7

Make small talk

Answer 7

Small talk helps open up and deepen connections. Don’t be above it.

Question 8

Trust

Answer 8

Trust can carry you further than most other things.

Question 9

Misperception and communication

Answer 9

Most communication failures stem from misperception. So before jumping to conclusions, do your research and try to understand the other party as best you can.

Question 10

Don’t interrupt someone

Answer 10

I think about this all the time. It’s so easy to interrupt someone once you understand what they are saying or have your response ready to go. But it’s a terrible habit. Because once you interrupt someone, they aren’t listening to you. They are thinking about finishing the point they wanted to make.

Question 11

Have you ever made an exception?

Answer 11

I’ve used this question dozens of times. It’s gold. It requires the other person to candidly reflect on whether or not they have treated someone differently in the past, and often, they have. Once they realize this, it’s more likely that you’ll become one of the exceptions as well.

Question 12

Dealing with hard bargainers

Answer 12

With difficult people, use standards. What are the company standards or the standards they have stated themselves? How are they potentially not living by those standards? Knowing that people hate to contradict themselves is a key part of understanding the power of standards and why you should leverage them.

Question 13

Frame and be incremental

Answer 13

Do not underestimate the power of framing and being incremental. It makes all the difference.

Question 14

Find the intangibles

Answer 14

It’s rarely just about maximizing the monetary outcome. Look for trades of unequal value. There are things that I have that cost me very little, but that you value highly. Identifying these levers is essential for maximizing the value of the negotiation for both parties.

Question 15

Be dispassionate

Answer 15

Your goal is not to be “right;” it’s to get the outcome you desire. Leave the emotions and ego at the door, and you will make fewer bad decisions. You’ll keep your eye on the prize.

Question 16

Don’t say “calm down”

Answer 16

Good negotiation requires valuing the other party and their needs. Telling someone to calm down fails to recognize the person’s perspective as legitimate, and more often than not, it will do more harm than good.

Question 17

Fundamental attribution error

Answer 17

We all imagine that others think like we do. They don’t. We also attribute people’s behaviors to their identity instead of recognizing the importance of the specific events happening in their lives at the moment. This is the fundamental attribution error at work, and it leads us to make poor judgments about people’s motivations and character.

Question 18

Cultural differences

Answer 18

In most places outside of the United States, relationships have greater weight in the negotiation process. In the U.S., we’re accustomed to purely transactional business relationships, but if we bring this perspective abroad, we will not be as effective as we could be.

Question 19

Compensation

Answer 19

Knowing how your company makes compensation decisions and what your boss values are important pieces of information before you ask for anything specific in a compensation discussion.