Lecture 8: Chapter 9 - Emotion in Relationships and Society Flashcards
Babies can recognize mothers’ voice over other women ____ after birth, and their mothers’ faces __________
Hours after birth, within a few days
- Still not very selective about the people they interact with, as long as they are warm, comfortable, well-fed, content
At 6 - 9 months, infants develop ______. What does this entail?
Attachment: the capacity to form more intense and selective emotional bonds with a few special people
- Produces desire to be near that person, an impulse
to turn to that person when threatened, and a sense
of security and confidence in exploring new things
What does attachment produce?
Stranger anxiety: fear of unfamiliar people
- Changes from being calm in stranger’s arms to being hysterical when mother leaves room
- Will check with parents to see if they are around, instead of freely playing with objects/people
Describe Bowlby’s perspective on infant attachment
- Skeptical of infants only needing food, protection from disease, and safety to develop normally
- Disagreed with psychoanalytical theory suggesting that anxiety was caused from sexual and aggressive drives
How did the work of Konrad Lorenz on imprinting in bird species support Bowlby’s theory?
- Newly hatched chicks would fixate on the first moving thing they saw, and follow it closely throughout their youth
- Target would usually be mother, but could be even
Lorenz himself - Bowlby believed human children undergo a similar process, instinctively identifying their parents and remaining close to them for care and protection
How did Harry Harlow’s baby monkey experiments prove Bowlby’s theory?
- Baby rhesus macaques were allowed to move freely around a cage containing “wire mother” and “cloth mother” doll, with only one having bottle of food
- Monkey spend most time clinging to cloth mother,
regardless of which monkey had bottle of food - Reinforcing the idea that it’s not just basic necessities
(ex: food and shelter) that people need but it’s this
feeling of connection as well
- Monkey spend most time clinging to cloth mother,
What is the strange situation (developed by Ainsworth and colleagues)?
Series of events to elicit attachment behaviour and measure it
Describe the 6 steps the experimenter will do and orchestrate to try and test the level of attachment the baby has to their caregiver (strange situation)
- An infant and parent enter an unfamiliar, toy-filled room and the infant is allowed to play
- A stranger enters the room, talks with the parent, and engages the infant for a few minutes
- The parent leaves, is gone for 3 minutes while the stranger remains in the room (test baby to see how they will react → control condition), and then parent returns for a few minutes
- Both the stranger and parent leave the room
- Stranger returns alone and tries to comfort and play with the infant
- The parent returns to the room
How does an infant between 6 months to 2 years of age behave through such stages?
- Play freely during first stage
- Will explore room while making sure parent is still
there and watching
- Will explore room while making sure parent is still
- As soon as parent leaves the room, most infants protest and cry loudly, sometimes trying to follow
- Stranger can provide some comfort but cannot fully alleviate distress
- Only full smoothed when parent returns, is able to
return to play
- Only full smoothed when parent returns, is able to
Bowlby and Ainsworth argued attachment was an ____
Instinct
Bowlby and Ainsworth argued that humans and likely most other mammals have an evolved neural attachment program that kicks in at a particular stage of development, activated by particular situations. At what specific timeframe does such activate?
Around 6 months - 2 years
What is the first theory as to why attachment emerges after 6 months?
- Infants’ vision improves substantially over the first 6 months
- Gives infants opportunity to recognize
caregivers/parents well enough to know if they have
come and gone
What is the second theory as to why attachment emerges after 6 months?
- Cognitive maturation at 9 months is enough to gain object permeance: understanding objects still exist even if they are out of view
- The tendency of very young infants to respond mainly to what they can see at the moment would decrease their response to someone leaving the room
- Would not be able to tell that parent has left the
room, away from them but out of sight, would not
call for parent with crying - If you know that the parent is away, crying has an
adaptive purpose because you could actually bring
the parent that you know is away into your site
- Would not be able to tell that parent has left the
What is the third theory as to why attachment emerges after 6 months?
- Between 6-9 months of age, most babies learn to crawl
- Begin exploring new environment, increased chance to also get lost, injure themselves, eating something poisonous, interacting with aggressive animals
- Attachment helps regulate need to explore with need for protection- As soon as caregiver is out of sight, child does
something to repair the breach - Protest is mechanism to keep parent close when
needed, distant enough to allow independent
exploring- Protests after 2 years become less intense as child becomes more capable and self-confident
- As soon as caregiver is out of sight, child does
What is the first behavioural mechanism of attachment?
- Synchrony between two individuals’ behaviour as a possible trigger for attachment system
- Newborns experience alternating periods of alertness and withdrawal- Mothers will try to interact with babies when alert, let
them rest at other times → develop instinctively a
level of synchrony in your behaviour w/ the child’s
behaviour - Newborns are attuned to this contingent responding,
particularly interested in mothers who are sensitive
to their cues for play vs. quiet
- Mothers will try to interact with babies when alert, let
By the time infants are _ months old, they contribute to behavioural synchrony, matching facial expressions and turn-taking with vocalizations
3
Greater behavioural synchrony between infant and its ____ predicted more secure attachment, albeit not also seen for ______
Father, mothers
What is the second biological mechanism of attachment?
- Oxytocin released in mothers while nursing to facilitate maternal behaviours, makes its way into breastmilk into infant, facilitating bonding and attachment
- Baby rats injected with chemical interfering with
oxytocin fail to develop preference for their
mother’s smell (Nelson & Panksepp, 1996)
What were the results of a father interacting with 5 month old babies after oxytocin nasal spray (compared to controls)?
- Touched their babies for longer periods of time (which in itself would increase oxytocin)
- Showed more reciprocity (father’s behaviour is closely responsive to baby’s)
- Babies showed more oxytocin in saliva in father’s given oxytocin spray, showing bonding effect of oxytocin
What is the third biological mechanism of attachment?
- Separation distress: emotional distress experienced/displayed when one is away from an attachment figure
- Associated with sudden decrease in endorphins (drop in the feel-good hormones)
- Kalin, Shelton, and Barksdale (1988) found that giving young rhesus monkeys separated from mothers morphine (endorphins) reduced their cries, and naloxone (block opiod receptors) increases their cries
Moles, Kieffer, & D’Amato (2004) found that mice that lack gene for the μ (mu) - type endorphin receptor - made far fewer cries when they were separated from their mothers. Why?
- Less receptors, less sensitive to endorphin and the strengths of endorphin to bond you
- If you lack receptors you are less dependent on this endorphin for bonding and so you have just general weaker bonding w/ your caregiver
Barr et al. (2008) found rhesus with allele of μ - type for more efficient vs. normal receptor genes. What were their specific findings?
- Cried more persistently when separated from their mothers
- Spent more time with their mothers when other monkeys were present
- Strong preference for the mother’s company
Human fMRI studies have found that brain areas associated with physical pain (eg. anterior cingulate cortex) activated during ____ _____
Social rejection
High dose of Tylenol reduced participant’s hurt feelings after social exclusion in both lab task and their real lives. What does this show a correlation between?
Psychological pain and physical pain
What are the four types of infant attachment?
Secure, Anxious-Ambivalent, Avoidant, Disorganized
Describe the behavioural profile for secure attachment
- Exploration when attachment figure is present
- Crying and protest when attachment figure leaves
- Easy soothing when the attachment figure returns
- Show higher cognitive functioning, become teens that are more socially mature, and adults who maintain good relationships
- Corresponds to about 65% of babies
Describe the behavioural profile for anxious-ambivalent attachment
- Are hesitant to explore even when the attachment figure is present
- Become intensely distressed and panics when attachment figure leaves
- Difficult to soothe when the attachment figure returns
Simultaneous clinging and pushing/twisting away - Have increased risk of aggressive, antisocial behaviour later in life
- Accounts for about 20% of babies
Describe the behavioural profile for avoidant attachment
- Seem unconcerned with the caregiver’s presence or absence
- Will play quietly and independently regardless of circumstance
- Babies still show increase in biological measures of stress (eg. Increased heart rate, salivary cortisol)
- Suggests babies are just as upset, but are handling
stress in a different way - Children insecurely attached (anxious-ambivalent/avoidant) are more likely to suffer from psychopathology and physical illness symptoms as adults
- Accounts for about 15% of babies
Describe the behavioural profile for disorganized attachment
- Infant displays intense anxiety even when the caregiver is present
- Frightened yet unable to turn to caregiver for comfort
- Higher chance that the caregiver is emotionally volatile, suffering from depression or trauma, or even abusive
- Rare group
What is the first factor influencing differences in attachment?
- Gene basis – attachment insecurity has been associated with poly morphism of a
serotonin receptor gene
- Different poly morphisms of serotonin receptors modulates the strength at which babies can bond to their parents
- Effect is not large, and different studies are not always consistent
What is the second factor influencing differences in attachment?
- Attachment style correlates strongly with the warmth of child-parent relationship years (and even decades later), and is consistent given the same caregiver
- However, infants show different attachment styles to different caregivers, suggesting environment also play role in attachment
What is the third factor influencing differences in attachment?
- Parenting styles when child is distressed can influence attachment
When parents are highly responsive to baby’s signals of being upset, baby feels it can rely on parent. Thus more likely to be classified as ______?
Secure
If a caregiver is smothering and ignores needs for independence, infant may become frightened by separation. Thus more likely to be classified as ______?
Anxious ambivalent
If the caregiver is distant and unresponsive to baby’s distress, baby will feel crying is pointless. Thus more likely to be classified as ______?
Avoidant
What is the fourth factor influencing differences in attachment?
- Cultural differences might change interpretation of attachment style
E.g. Japanese mothers typically will stay with their infants almost constantly
- Infants may be less used to not having mother
around in strange situation, would be classified as
anxious-ambivalent in Western culture but not in
Japan
Which 3 attachment styles would Ainsley and Bowlby say are attached to parents?
Secure
Anxious-ambivalent
Avoidant attachment
“______” attachments (whether _____ or ______) present issues if child’s tendencies carry on into adulthood
“Insecure” attachments (whether anxious-ambivalent or avoidant)
It’s okay if a child is avoidant or anxious in childhood because the risks to their well-being are pretty low, these issues only really exist when a child has to be ___________________
Adaptive to their environment:
- E.g. panicking at separation from loved ones, not asking for help, hiding emotions rather than showing them
On average parent-arranged marriages in India are _____ than love-based marriages in the US. Whereas, parent-arranged marriages in China are ___ happy than love-based marriages in the US
- Happier
- Less
What is the first characteristic that is attractive cross culturally?
- Healthy people more attractive than unhealthy people
- E.g. in women, features include long, shiny hair, rosy skin
- E.g. In women having a waist: hip ratio of 0.7- Proportion found to be ideal to bear children without
extreme risk
- Proportion found to be ideal to bear children without
What is the second characteristic that is attractive cross culturally?
- Average Features are found to be attractive
- Averaged faces simulated on computers rated more attractive than individual faces composing the average
- Average faces more familiar, making one feel more comfortable
- May also represent genes that have succeeded in past generations- E.g. having a nose or mouth larger or smaller than
usual is questionable from an evolutionary
standpoint → because typically things will gravitate
towards the mean across time
- E.g. having a nose or mouth larger or smaller than
What is the third characteristic that is attractive cross culturally?
- Certain personality traits generally seen as attractive
- People like happy, kind people that are intelligent with a good sense of humour
- Physical attractiveness and personality are not independent- If someone has one good quality it starts to make
other qualities look good and vice versa for bad
qualities - E.g. Will find people we like more attractive, will be
repulsed by someone you dislike
- If someone has one good quality it starts to make
What is the fourth characteristic that is attractive cross culturally?
- People are more attracted to people similar to them
- People value others with similar values, education, attitudes, lifestyles, favourite activities, and beliefs
- Similarities in personality are less important, where happy couples have one extraverted and introverted person
The early stages of romantic relationship are marked by _______ ______(first stage). Describe this stage.
Passionate love
- Frequent thoughts about the other person, intense desire to be together, excitement from the partner’s attention
- Each person is likely to idealize the other
- Aware of the positive qualities, but less aware of
flaws
- Intensely rewarding even on neurological level
- Viewing one’s loved one while under fMRI activated
dopamine reward centers responsive to drugs like
cocaine
What is the first behaviour change associated with the passionate love phase?
People who had recently fallen in love describe themselves in more diverse ways than prior to falling in love → self-expansion
- When you are passionately in love w/ someone their
traits, personality, activities, and attitudes start
assimilating into your own self schema that you start
to embody or atleast want to embody
What is the second behaviour change associated with the passionate love phase?
As a relationship continues, partners grow even more alike
- However, couples often overestimate their similarity in attitudes and preferences
- Emphasize shared feelings over differences
- Projects their own feelings onto the other
partner
The passionate love phase is followed by the _______ _____ phase. Describe this stage.
Compassionate love: love that emphasizes security, mutual care, and protection, as well as affection and shared fun
- Begin to introduce each other to families, may begin
to share resources, live together, or make other long
term commitments
- Often related to high life satisfaction, much more so
than passionate love
Mikulincer and colleagues (2000) wanted to find a way to measure the attachment styles of people in romantic relationships. Describe their methods in detail.
Developed an indirect attachment measurement by asking whether people are quicker to detect words of closeness or separation when they feel threatened
- Asked participants to watch a computer screen
- When they saw a “prime” word flash on the screen
for a second, they had to decide whether the next
string of letters was a word
- Sometimes prime word was “failure” (to prime
anxiety), sometimes it was a neutral word
- Following string of words could be one of these 3:
1. Nonword string of letters (neutral)
2. Proximity-related word like closeness or love
3. Distance-related words like rejection and
abandonment
Mikulincer and colleagues (2000) wanted to find a way to measure the attachment styles of people in romantic relationships. Describe their findings in detail.
If certain kinds of thoughts are already on one’s mind, they should be able to identify words related to those thoughts more quickly
- People identified proximity related words faster after being primed with “failure” vs. neutral word
- Threat of failure makes one want to feel close to
someone regardless of attachment style (i.e. secure,
anxious, or avoidant)
In another study, Mikulincer et al. (2002) found the same effect replacing proximity words with _______________________. What does this suggest?
The name of the participant’s attachment figures
Suggests they want to be closer to their partners and people in their lives when they feel some form of anxiety (instinctive quality)
Hazan and Shaver (1987) had paragraphs printed in newspapers for people to pick they identify with the most and mail back to them.
In addition, in this newspaper, they had dozens of self-report items measuring beliefs about:
- Feelings about relationships in general
- Attitudes towards respondents’ most important partner
- Characteristics of the respondents’ relationships with parents and important romantic partners
Describe their findings with respect to attachment
- Adult attachments in roughly same proportions as infant attachments
- 56% secure, 19% anxious, 25% avoidant
- Attachment labels unknown in newspaper
Hazan and Shaver (1987) found that people with diff. attachment styles had different relationship histories and beliefs. Secure:
- Longer relationships than other attachment style adults
- Less likely to have been divorced
- Describe their most important love experience as happy, friendly, and trusting
- Endorsed the belief that ups and downs are normal in relationships
- Unlikely to say that it was easy to fall in love, or that they fell in love frequently
- Described themselves as easy to know and likeable
- Described other people as well-intentioned and good-hearted
Hazan and Shaver (1987) found that people with diff. attachment styles had different relationship histories and beliefs. Anxious:
- Describe themselves as obsessively preoccupied with their partners
- Experiencing intense emotional highs and lows in relationships
- More likely than secure and avoidant adults to agree that their love experiences were love at first sight
- Felt an intense feeling of oneness with their partner was important to their well-being
- Most likely to say that they fell in love easily and often
- Agreed the most strongly out of all 3 groups that they experienced much self-doubt, were misunderstood or unappreciated
- More able than most people to commit to a long-term relationship
Hazan and Shaver (1987) found that people with diff. attachment styles had different relationship histories and beliefs. Avoidant:
- Describe being afraid of closeness in their most important relationships
- Felt unable to accept their partner’s imperfections
- More likely than secure and anxious adults to feel that romantic love does not last forever
- Were less likely out of all 3 groups to agree that romantic feelings grow and wane repeatedly over the course of a relationship
- More likely to endorse statement that they were independent and able to get along by themselves
According to Fraley and Shaver (2000), adults styles reflect deeply ingrained expectations about caregiver/partner relationships that are the basis for infant styles. Secure infants expect caregivers to be responsive, consistent, and warm, thus, secure adults think of themselves as
Lovable and worthy, and see their lovers as kind, trustworthy and dependable
According to Fraley and Shaver (2000), adults styles reflect deeply ingrained expectations about caregiver/partner relationships that are the basis for infant styles. Anxious infants expect inconsistency from caregivers, and are highly dependent and terrified of separation, thus anxious adults want to be in
Deep, intense relationships, think such relationship are possible (because had that w/ parent) but don’t really trust others, don’t think of themselves as loveable, constantly afraid of abandonment
Avoidant adults appear to have given up on committed, intimate relationships. How do Mikulincer et al. (2000) findings support such?
Found that avoidant people did not respond faster to distant related words, but anxious people did → inconsistency
- If you’re an avoidant infant or adult you have given
up on other people, so you should be very sensitive
to your relationships w/ other people. We would
think that if you present an avoidant infant or adult in
a situation where they are primed to be more
stressed, they should be more prone to be more
distant
Mikulincer et al. (2000) found that avoidant people did not respond faster to distant related words, but anxious people did. Why is this an inconsistency?
If you’re an avoidant infant or adult you have given up on other people, so you should be very sensitive to your relationships w/ other people. We would think that if you present an avoidant infant or adult in a situation where they are primed to be more stressed, they should be more prone to be more distant
To study the inconsistency regarding avoidant people not responding faster to distant related words, but anxious people did. Mikulincer et al. (2000) repeated the study but had participants complete the word-detection task while listening to a loud annoying story over headphones (amped up the stress). What were the results w/ respect to the avoidant participants? What do they suggest?
The stressful prime had an even bigger effect on the avoidant participants distance-word recognition than the anxious participants
Suggests that avoidant participants put mental effort into suppressing their fears of rejection, but were overloaded by stress so their natural instincts came out
Adults do not necessarily fall into one attachment category, but are usually attributes of ______________, with _____________?
Adults do not necessarily fall into one attachment category, but are usually attributes of all 3 attachment styles, with one being more prominent than the rest
Kim Bartholomew (1990) argued that attachment styles represent two working models or implicit internal beliefs creating two dimensions of measure of attachment. Describe the first dimension
Anxiety dimension – measures whether a person generally has a positive/negative feelings of self-worth and desirability as a partner
Kim Bartholomew (1990) argued that attachment styles represent two working models or implicit internal beliefs creating two dimensions of measure of attachment. Describe the second dimension
Avoidance dimension – measures whether a person generally has positive/negative beliefs about other people
- People feeling others are less trustworthy and finding
less value in romantic relationships score higher on
avoidance attachment
Describe the methods of Fraley and Shaver’s (1998) study
- Went to a local airport and secretly recorded behaviour of couples waiting at the gate until either both or one of the partners got on the plane
- If only one partner went on plane, the other was
asked to fill out an attachment-style questionnaire
- If only one partner went on plane, the other was
With respect to the findings of Fraley and Shaver’s (1998) study, Women who scored higher on attachment anxiety on the questionnaire reported feeling ________________?
More upset about the separation
With respect to the findings of Fraley and Shaver’s (1998) study, Women who scored higher on avoidance had shown ______________?
Fewer contact and caregiving behaviours and more avoidance behaviours
- E.g. less kissing, hugging, gently touching, whispering
to partner
- E.g. more looking away from the partner, breaking off
physical contact
Describe the implications of Fraley and Shaver’s (1998) findings
- Self-reports seem to be matching up with this dimensional behaviour
- Research reinforced theory of independence between attachment anxiety (more related to self-worth) and avoidance (more related to the worth of others)
- Attachment anxiety best predicted how women felt
when facing a separation (more anxious = more
distress) - Attachment avoidance best predicted women’s
behaviour (more avoidant = less contact/closeness
behaviours elicited to show that emotion)
- Attachment anxiety best predicted how women felt
With respect to Fraley and Shaver’s (1998) study, the questionnaire measure did not accurately predict men’s behaviour or feelings. Why?
- Could be that men have different attachment system compared to women
- Could be men feel more constrained in displaying affectionate behaviour compared to women
What are two biological mechanisms of attachment in adult romantic relationships
Oxytocin and Vasopressin
- Married men with more vasopressin receptors have closer relationships with their wives and are less likely to have considered divorce
- Participants that show more facial displays of romantic love and affiliation while verbally describing memories of strong romantic love showed greater increases in oxytocin levels
Compared to a placebo group, couples who receive an oxytocin sprays showed significant ratio of ____: ____behaviour when discussing with each other a conflict. What does this suggest?
Ratio of positive: negative behaviour
- E.g. More eye contact, emotional disclosure, caring,
validating the partner’s perspective
- E.g. Less criticism, contempt, defensiveness
Not only does oxytocin help you bond w/ your partner, it helps you navigate conflict in a more positive light
What is the first factor that predicts marital satisfaction?
- The happiness of a relationship before marriage
- Most marriages that ended in divorce within 7 years were unstable already
What is the second factor that predicts marital satisfaction?
- Partner’s commitment to wait out bad periods in relationship
- Out of people who reported being unhappily married during the first wave of the study but did not divorce, 86% reported being happily married 5 years later
What is the third factor that predicts marital satisfaction?
- Demographic Characteristics (correlations not causations)
- Over 20 years when married
- Grew up in two-parent homes
- Dated for a long time, but did not live together- Could be correlated with religiosity
- Have the same level of education, especially high level of education
- Have a good income
- Have a long-term happy disposition
- Live in a small town or rural area
- Are religious and of same religious affiliation
- Approximate the same age with similar attitudes
- Have sex often and argue rarely
- Could be correlated with religiosity
What is the fourth factor that predicts marital satisfaction?
- Not getting bored
- Physical attraction still present in compassionate love, but each person feels less excitement from the other’s presence and less insistence on being together constantly
- Couples can reignite spark by doing novel activities- Aron and colleagues (2000) found that when asking
long-term romantic couples into a lab and have them
do arousing (doing 3-legged race across room) vs.
boring activities- Ps reported their relationship improved after
doing arousing activities vs. boring activities
- Ps reported their relationship improved after
- Aron and colleagues (2000) found that when asking
What is the fifth factor that predicts marital satisfaction?
- Able to see more flaws in each other over time
- Partners over time begin to point out each other’s weaknesses, quirky habits, and bad moods
- Will start to uncover big and small incompatibilities- People tend to be more satisfied with their
relationship if they consider their partner’s flaw
specific to particular situations or related to their
virtues (E.g. Being unwilling to try new activities
while also being stable/consistent)
- People tend to be more satisfied with their
What is the sixth factor that predicts marital satisfaction?
- Having equity
- People who feel they are getting as much as they give in a relationship are happier than those feeling they do all the work
- People trust partners more if they perceive they partner is willing to make some sacrifices for them
What is the seventh factor that predicts marital satisfaction?
- Communication Skills
- Happy couple generally have high levels of self-disclosure, or sharing of personal, intimate and confidential information- Develops in strong relationships over time
- People feel uneasy if someone discloses deep
secrets too early in a relationship
- Should care in moderation without lying or
withholding important information
- Develops in strong relationships over time
After filming couples in arguments about various disagreements John Gottman (1998) identified several emotional components in communication that predict future of relationship. Interestingly, ____ ___ not always a major problem as it often lets partner understand seriousness of the concern presented, providing opportunity for them to make changes
Mild anger
Describe the first of Gottman’s “four horsemen of the apocalypse” that create relationship problems during communication
- Criticism
- Criticism about personal flaw, suggesting changes in behaviour in a nonconstructive way- E.g. attacking spouse (or their relatives), listing
spouse’s flaws, blaming the spouse for problems in
the relationship
- E.g. attacking spouse (or their relatives), listing
Describe the second of Gottman’s “four horsemen of the apocalypse” that create relationship problems during communication
- Defensiveness
- Usually a response to criticism ^
- Defending oneself by denying the complaint is valid
- Providing an excuse for the behaviour
- Countercriticizing the spouse
Describe the third of Gottman’s “four horsemen of the apocalypse” that create relationship problems during communication
- Contempt
- Showing disdain for partner (e.g. rolling eyes, being sarcastic, insulting partner) to suggest they are incompetent or beneath the speaker
Describe the fourth of Gottman’s “four horsemen of the apocalypse” that create relationship problems during communication
- Stonewalling
- Ignoring or shutting out partner that is trying to communicate something- E.g. sitting stone faced, not saying anything, looking
away, closing eyes
- E.g. sitting stone faced, not saying anything, looking
Describe Gottman’s common communication pattern in happy heterosexual relationships
- (Usually) Wife will raise concern about relationship with mild levels of anger,
expressing what she believes is a problem, and a potential solution - Husband shows willingness to consider wife’s perspective, accepts wife’s influence on
figuring out solution - Husband remains calm, rather than getting agitated
- Wife makes a joke
- Husband expresses affection/happiness
Describe Gottman’s common communication pattern in less happy heterosexual relationships for the wife and husband, respectively
Wife is more likely to come charging with high levels of anger
- Should instead try to stay calm when raising issues
- Should bring up issues when relaxed
- Should try not to frame concern as
criticism/accusation
Husband more likely to deny wife’s power in relationship, and escalate negative emotions in the conversation
- Should try to interpret their partner’s concerns as
opportunities to develop relationship
- Should not see concerns as an attack/threat
- Should be open to solutions proposed by the
partner
What are the 3 emotions in caring for others?
- Sympathy: concerned attention toward someone who is suffering
- Compassion: a feeling experienced in response to another’s suffering that motivates helping behaviour
- Personal distress: self-focused anxiety in the face of another’s suffering which isn’t related to motivating helping behaviour
Eisenberg et al. (1989) wanted to see if sympathy and compassion promoted helping. Explain their methods
Told ps they were hired by a local TV station to determine how people responded to news stories
- On the news broadcast they showed single mom with
her 2 kids in a hospital room, describing car accident
where kids had been serious injured
- Talked about kids’ fears of falling behind In school
- Talked about her stressful feelings of supporting
household and still spending time in hospital - Experimenters videotaped participants facial expressions and measured their heart rates
After news program, participants were given a letter from the mother portrayed in the news clip, asking for ps’ assistance
- Given along with note from professor running study
saying she encouraged mother to write letter
- Adult participants asked to spend time helping
mother with housework
- Asked to write down on paper number hours
will to help
- Child participants asked to help collect injured
children’s homework assignment during their own
recess breaks
- Could mark on calendar the days they would
collect homework
Eisenberg et al. (1989) wanted to see if sympathy and compassion promoted helping. What were the two conditions? Why did they establish such conditions?
Split participants into “low helper” and “high helper” groups to see if heart rates, facial expressions and self-reports differed (were correlated w/ each other)
Both groups showed expressions of sadness when watching the video. Describe the results from the “high helper” group specifically in Eisenberg et al. (1989) study
High helpers’ heart rates dropped when the segment showing the hospital scene began
- Less personally upset, but paying close attention to
the film
- Showed more concerned attention (e.g. leaning
forward, eyebrows contracted and lowered as if
concentrating)
Both groups showed expressions of sadness when watching the video. Describe the results from the “low helper” group specifically in Eisenberg et al. (1989) study
Low helpers’ heart rates tended to speed up when the segment showing the hospital scene began
- Similar to a personal distress response
Describe the implications from Eisenberg et al.’s (1989) study
- Seems as though low helpers have a personal distress response whereas high helpers have a compassionate response
- Emotional regulation may play a role in expressing sympathy vs. personal distress
- Sad expressions were associated with both
sympathy and personal distress, suggesting both
start with empathic sadness- However, it’s the level of emotional control you
have of your sadness that will predict whether
you’re going to help or succumb to your own
personal distress
- However, it’s the level of emotional control you
- Sad expressions were associated with both
Eisenberg and colleagues (1989) documented facial expression associated with sympathy/compassion consisting of a combination of
Mild sadness with concerned attention
Hertenstein et al. (2006) found that ___was also important in expressing sympathy and empathy towards someone else
Touch
Describe the methods of Hertenstein et al.’s (2006) study
- Randomly assigned people to “toucher” or “touchee” roles
- Toucher was trying to express emotions just with
touching the other person’s arm - Participants separated by a curtain, so the “touchee”
could not see the “toucher’s” facial expressions
- Toucher was trying to express emotions just with
Describe the findings of Hertenstein et al.’s (2006) study and what they suggest
- Touchers typically communicated sympathy with moderately intense patting and stroking movements
- Touchees accurately interpreted touch as sympathy
50% of the time, even when love and gratitude
(extremely similar to sympathy) were included as
additional choices
- Touchees accurately interpreted touch as sympathy
- Thus, sympathy is very specific and can be expressed very specifically w/ touch more so than vision can
- People watching a video of touch showed comparable levels of accuracy
Compassion expressed in simple nonverbal vocal sounds is recognized at above level chance levels as well, suggesting that
It’s not just vision but also other senses that can play a role in expressing sympathy and compassion towards someone
What is another emotion associated with caring for others?
Nurturant love: emotion elicited by cues of youth, vulnerability, and helplessness, which motivates caregiving intended to enhance the other’s well-being
- A.k.a maternal love, e.g. feelings felt when holding
baby, caring for infant, seeing cute animals
Nurturant love is similar to love felt for _____ _____ and ______ ______?
Attachment figures and romantic partners
- Mothers show brain reward circuit activity when looking at pictures of babies, just as lovers do when looking act pictures of romantic partner
- Oxytocin released during surges in childbirth, nursing, and skin-to-skin touch, playing important role in mother-baby bonding
Explain how nurturant love is different from sympathy/compassion with respect to heart rates
- Sympathy is associated with reduced heart rate, reflecting strong attention towards person in distress
- Nurturant love is associated with faster heart rate and breathing (similar to personal distress ironically)
Across mammalian species, mothers/caregivers nurture young by grooming, licking, rubbing, and carrying, as well as feeding and protecting them, which may explain why _____ is so easily conveyed with touch
Sympathy
- Describe the methods of Griskevicius, Shiota, & Neufeld’s (2010) experiment
Had participants either:
1. Relive an experience of nurturant love
2. Read a short story meant to evoke nurturant love
feelings
- Describe the findings of Griskevicius, Shiota, & Neufeld’s (2010) experiment.
- Found that participants were more careful in analyzing news article presenting several arguments for a proposal they disagreed with (I.e. new rule requiring students to pass comprehensive exams before being allowed to graduate)
- If arguments were good, and primed to feel nurturant love, they were more persuaded than the no-emotion group
- If arguments were bad, and primed to feel nurturant love, they were more skeptical than the no-emotion group
- Thus, people are more careful when they feel
nurturant love
- Describe the methods of Sherman et al.’s (2013) experiment.
Showed (primed) women w/ either pictures of babies and toddlers with exaggerated cuteness features or the original photos
- Describe the results of Sherman et al.’s (2013) experiment and what they suggest?
- When asked to do a line drawing task, women that saw the exaggerated features were more accurate in tracing the line than those who had seen the less cute babies
- Thus, if you can evoke this nurturant love, you are more careful
With respect to another emotion in caring for others, distinguish between the two types of empathy. Firstly, define empathetic accuracy
Empathic accuracy: ability to figure out what another person is thinking and feeling (Ickes et al., 1990)
With respect to another emotion in caring for others, distinguish between the two types of empathy. Define emotional empathy
Emotional empathy: feeling what another person is feeling, ideally including similar physiology and expression as well as subjective experience
- Difference between understanding what another
person is feeling vs. actually feeling the same
emotion (e.g. a dog phobia)
- Argued to be due to natural mechanisms matching
each other’s physiological/behavioural states
- If you can match someone’s behavioural states
you may be more likely to help them and by
working together both people benefit
Levenson and Ruef (1992) found that participants are better able to track emotions of videotaped strangers if they showed similar changes in heart rate over the course of the taped sequence. What does this suggest?
Idea that emotions are basic emotions and physiology is one component of that emotional experience
Later researchers suggest empathy is derived from activity of ____ _____?
Mirror neurons
Explain what mirror neurons are and how they correlate with empathy
Motor neurons that show similar patterns of activity when we observe other’s movements and when we make the same movements ourselves
- Montgomery et al. (2009) found that participants who scored higher on a questionnaire measure of empathic perspective taking was correlated with greater brain activity in areas rich with mirror neurons when looking at photographs of other’s emotional expressions
Whether emphathy is good for a relationship depends on (2):
- Whether we are talking about empathic accuracy/emotional empathy
- What the target is thinking and feeling
Emotional empathy can be hazardous in situations where _____?
One/both partners might become upset
- Could lead to escalation of conflict and distress
- Interestingly, people in friendly/loving relationships seldom express displeasure towards one another, and when they do usually the other person doesn’t notice
Simpson et al. (2005) found that empathic accuracy is generally good, but can have drawbacks. They showed couples 12 photographs of more and less attractive men and women and asked to rate their attractiveness (*were told they might be asked to talk for a while with person they rated as most attractive). What were the results?
- When watching a video tape of the task, couples who were closest (rated themselves as the closest) showed the least empathic accuracy in guessing what their partners were thinking and feeling
- Thus, if you’re not good at empathetic accuracy in these situations that is good for your relationship
- Especially true if partners were rating very attractive
people
- Especially true if partners were rating very attractive
Simpson et al. (2003) found that empathic accuracy was associated with ______ relationship satisfaction when partner was thinking of something threatening to relationship (like the ones orchestrated in the lab) and ______ relationship satisfaction when partner was thinking of something non-threatening to relationship
Decreased, increased
Laible et al. (2000) found that adolescents with secure relationships with parents and peers were best adjusted in life. Describe the results in detail and what they suggest
- Those with insecure relationships with both were worst adjusted in life
- Teens who had secure relationships with peers, but insecure relationships with parents were better adjusted than those who the reverse were true
- Particularly strong for girls, most associated with
close, warm, supportive friendships vs. casual/activity-
based friendships
- Particularly strong for girls, most associated with
Seems as though the most important thing in terms of your stability as you’re growing up is your relationship w/ your peers, and then your parents
Kosfeld et al. (2005) had participants either take oxytocin or placebo nasal spray while doing investment task.
Task: you have 12 dollars, can invest it to stranger to quadruple amount, but the stranger decides how much to give back to you (i.e they could keep all of it, or give you less than 12)
What were the results? What do they suggest?
- Participants who took oxytocin spray invested more than those with placebo, more willing to trust stranger
- Oxytocin may also influence nonintimate relationships requiring trust
Wiltermuth & Heath (2009) had people walk in step or normally. What did they find? What do their findings suggest?
- Found people that those who walked in step made greater bets in a game where high bets could earn the greatest reward, but only if all other group members placed high bets as well
- Have more synchrony in behaviour and they’re more willing to cooperate if they did the walking step
Suggests that synchronized behaviour tends to promote cooperation in groups
Describe the methods of Wiltermuth & Heath’s (2009) second study on synchronized behaviour
- Wiltermuth & Heath (2009) had people move cups in rhythm with song heard over headphones
- Some heard song at same tempo, moved in synchrony, others had different tempos (moving at a different pace of the cups)
Describe the results of Wiltermuth & Heath’s (2009) second study on synchronized behaviour
- Participants in synchrony condition donated more to common bank account to earn interest but be shared with group, rather than keeping the money themselves
- Thus, if you move in synchrony with the others you’re going to tend to cooperate w/ the group more
With respect to another emotion in society, describe gratitude
Gratitude: feeling experienced when someone does something unexpectedly kind for us, and does not seem to expect us to reciprocate
- Suggests person helping was motivated by our need, suggesting they care about us, understands our needs, and sees the relationship as communal rather than exchange-oriented
- Helps find good relationship partners and invest in them
Romantic couples assigned to express gratitude towards each other in a 5-minute lab convo.(v.s. discuss another positive event) reported ____________________. What does this suggest?
Better relationship quality 6 months later
Thus, not just for friendships, expressing gratitude for your partner is important in relationship satisfaction
Williams and Bartlett (2015) had participants in college provide thoughtful feedback on a high school senior’s college application. College students either received an effusive thank you letter or a generic one. What were the results? What do they suggest?
Those that had better thank you letters reported a greater willingness to spend time helping the mentee in the future
Expressing gratitude may help bind the beneficiary to giver, and can motivate continued investing to the beneficiary by the giver
With respect to another emotion in society, describe the appeasement function of embarrassment
Embarrassment: emotion felt when one violates a social convention, attracting unexpected and unwanted social attention
- Display lets others know you care about their opinion,
and that you hope for their understanding after doing
something inappropriate
- Highly similar across cultures, resembling bashful
behaviours of a child/subordinate
Embarrassment likely evolved as an appeasement gesture for _________________?
Young animals to deter an attack from a superior after they do something inappropriate
- Turn aggressive situation into more polite/friendly
one
If embarrassment is shown, other will: (4)
- Like you more if you show embarrassment after a transgression instead of apathy
- Improve their opinion of you if you blush, because it is difficult to fake
- More likely forgive you
- More likely help person and feel affection towards you
*Limited in that will only divert anger if people think transgression was an accident
With respect to another emotion in society, describe pride
Pride: emotion felt when you accept credit for a positive outcome, and it supports a positive aspect of your self-concept
Considered the opposite of embarrassment
- Person tilts head back slightly, sits/stands tall, puts
his arms back slightly above head or on hips,
sometimes with a small smile
- *Embarrassment and pride are similar to how the
principle of antithesis works
Williams & DeSteno (2009) had people do 2 tasks, first as individuals and then as a group. After the first task, at random told some people they had performed unusually well (eliciting pride in one of the groups). What were the results? What do they suggest?
- When they moved from individual work to group work, people who believed that they had done well on the first task played a more prominent role in the group activity
- Other members of their group described them as more likeable than the group that didn’t get the pride prime
Griskevicius, Shiota, and Nowlis (2010) had participants induced to feel pride, contentment, or no emotion & wanted to see if behaviours would change if these 3 emotions were instilled. Participants were then asked how desirable they found several different kinds of consumer products, given a limited amount of money. Describe the results and what they suggest
- Pride condition rated flashy products for display (e.g. watches, shoes) as more desirable than nice home products (e.g. new bed) even if they had limited money - Suggests they were motivated to gain others’ attention
In general, pride helps advertise value to others, to take advantage of all the benefits of high social status
In follow-up to Griskevicius, Shiota, and Nowlis’ (2010) study, the effect was mediated by self-reported desire to “have people notice you”. Thus, its not just ______
Not just instinctive, people are consciously aware that they want people to notice them if they feel more prideful
