Jokes Flashcards
A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in the zoo is a dog.
It was a shitzu.
What’s the raddest aircraft?
A hella-copter
The curtains are drawn in my living room,
but the rest of the furniture is real.
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
He was outstanding in his field.
What do you call a broken can opener?
A can’t opener.
Ehen corals get stressed they die. You know what they stress out about?
Current events.
Do you know what color the wind is?
Blew.
What do you call a cheap circumcision?
A rip off.
Klepto
Literally
A blind man walks into a bar,
and a table, and a chair.
Where did Sally go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
You gotta hand it
to blind prostitutes.
A dyslexic agnostic insomniac
stays awake at night wondering if there’s a doG.
Girls, odd numbered groups
They can’t even
Crows, Dying, trucks
They could only say “kah”
I’ll never get the tent up
Too many mistakes
The highest form of flattery is not immitation.
It’s a plateau.
What happened when the cow tried to jump over the barbed wire fence?
Udder destruction
Know why Ireland is so wealthy?
It’s capital is Dublin.
I’ve been working onthis joke for 14 days
But its punchline is too weak
I don’t need a spine.
It’s holding me back
Taylor
Sew-sew
Butcher
Make the cut
I’ve been to the dentist
Know the drill
