Ideas Flashcards
July 2nd: Entry 1
Could it be that my dopamine system is hijacked by contemplation itself? A way to undo this could be memory focused thinking. Think to yourself “remember something” constantly.
July 3rd: Entry 1
Thinking about ways to dispel negative emotions makes you more conscious of the emotion and therefore increases it’s power over you.
July 4th: Entry 1
When doing your memory exercises, focus on that pressure sensation that takes place in the center of your mind when remembering. Or at least attempt to achieve that sensation.
July 5th: Entry 1
I feel fine. What I did to feel fine, I took a hot shower; cried with a forceful exhale, squeezing until my lungs were empty; and forcefully inhaled until my lungs were expanded to the max. Which of these factors was responsible? The shower, the crying, the crying with a forceful exhale, the forceful exhale on it’s own, or the forceful inhale? Will have to try each on their own. Also try the belt around the abdomen. Diaphragm control and focus. Physiologic sigh: take in a long inhale followed by a shorter inhale, both using the diaphragm, followed by a longer exhale. Inhale through nose, exhale through mouth.
Inhaling for longer and more intensely will speed your heart up. Exhaling for longer and more intensely will slow your heart down
Slower inhales and exhales will increase heart rate variability, which improves decision making
Maybe these negative emotions are originating from my diaphragm. Diaphragm exercises?
Try to keep your diaphragm relaxed as much as possible, thereby keeping your HR lowered
Also record the next time you cry.
July 7th: Entry 1
Hippocampus visualization and sensation when doing remembering exercises. Might help deal with emotional pain as visualization is supposed to help with physical and chronic pain. N back with immediate past events, like things I’ve just done.
July 8th: Entry 1
Memory training technique: mark a time with your watch; when that time is up, try and remember everything that occurred between that moment and now. Continuously increase the time as you improve.
Or maybe it would be smarter to increase based on detail? How would that work though.
July 9th: Entry 1
Or I can just do the exercises every interval, say 15 minutes, instead of every other interval
July 9th: Entry 2
Don’t you find it strange that you don’t want to do the things that you want to do?
July 12th: Entry 1
It never feels good or right. The reason your unhappy is because you’ve let that stop you.
July 12th: Entry 2
Wanting to die is better than being happy with this
July 12th: Entry 3
The most powerful form of control is control of desire. If I am acting then clearly I am desiring. I’ve started doing my exercises. Clearly this means that I want to do them and am possibly exercising some control over wanting or at least it is something to feel good about. Anything
July 12th: Entry 4
Anything you do then obviously you want to do it
July 18th: Entry 1
Preference changes in response to present sensations and experience in the present. After starting down a particular path you might find that you prefer it
July 31st: Entry 1
I’ve found an explanation for my current situation, gathered from What I’ve Learned’s YouTube channel. In this video, which I believed pertained to internet addiction, he mentioned the idea of wiring your brain to respond to low energy rewards. Perhaps in my own life, the reason I have a lack of motivation is due to me having access to instant, low energy gratification which has lead to a down regulation of of my brain’s neurological functions that are responsible for motivation. Perhaps an exercise that would be helpful is to intentionally delay gratification no matter the type. Before hopping on the game, crank out some push-ups or cross something off the to do list. Then again, what is motivation? Motivation is the same as desire. You are motivated to achieve the things you desire. I have a desire to be educated and athletic, however, I am unmotivated to do these things because of a desire for other things like instant gratification and because these long term goals often bring undesirable states with them in the process of endeavoring to achieve them. So how do you solve this issue? Either increase the emotions of desire for the thing you wholeheartedly want. Don’t know how to do that, although wholehearted is a good word to implement in my decision making. Wholehearted wants should supersede non wholehearted wants. Although that’s easier said than done. So then if that’s a dead end, you can also decrease the desire for these other things that you don’t wholeheartedly want, instant gratification, or decrease the undesirability of these negative states, like pain. That is something that is easier to do. Increase your resilience against these emotions. You do this with the former by reducing exposure to the desired stimulus, cutting back on gaming. You’ll inadvertently be doing this by delaying gratification as well. The latter is done by exposing yourself extensively to negative experiences. Your study/insecurity issue could be overcome by simply exposing yourself to it until you are acclimated and get over. The brain gets better at what it repeatedly does. Repeat. Repeat some more.
Take some time
To reflect on why you want to do the things you want to do
