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Drama > Fucked up fairytale > Flashcards

Fucked up fairytale Flashcards

1
Q

And of course, the dragon issue
(crowd reacts)

A

Bread! Bread for sale! reasonably priced for these hard times…

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2
Q

E.A: what was that?

A

I said, bread for sale! You see, I make bread. I am just a poor orphan, bread selling boy. Bread baked in sunshine!

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3
Q

Is that some sort of attempt to brand your product? Sunshine bread?

A

No. I actually bake my bread in sunshine. I have no oven, only a magnifying glass and some warm rocks (beat) dont ask how i warmed them

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4
Q

E.A: Now! back to the press conference

A

I have 3 signature flavours! Raisin, meat, and mystery bread

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5
Q

That’s all well and good but the royal family prefers croissants

A

CROISSANTS ARE RICHY RICH THINGS!! Ahem. Bread for sale!

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6
Q

Let’s hear from our first speaker. Born and raised in our very kingdom, a former employee of the royal court, please give a warm welcome to…

A

that’s the jester!

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7
Q

Jester: yes, hello. i am-

A

a joke!

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8
Q

The king is ruining our land! Food shortages! Dragons everywhere! No available horses for purchase

A

It’s true. I had to horse pool to even get here

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9
Q

E.A: If you start singing i WILL throw up! Now people! Let’s go back to your lives

A

Bread! Bread for sale! Who wants bread?
etc etc chase everyone offstage

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10
Q

E.A: Regardless, it will work. I know it will. Now-

A

(interrupt and walk on stage thru castle entrance) Bread for sale! Who is wants bread?

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11
Q

Wait a minute! That’s not in the script! What are you doing here? How did you get here???

A

Selling BREAD. Want some bread, strange shadowy guy in the corner?

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12
Q

Take the lights off me!! And get backstage!!

A

Awww okay (EXIT)

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13
Q

A strange figure stood in the darkness of night in the town square. This figure had a plan for themself

A

(turn around) I have to find a way to make more bread. Cooking under the sun on a suspiciously warmed rock won’t work anymore! I’ll have to… STEAL the half human half dragon hybrid! I can use their fire to REALLY cook my bread. Yes, then I’ll be unstoppable! And I see absolutely NO repercussions for this!

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14
Q

I could help you with that

A

What? Whos there? Who comes to help a poor orphaned bread boy?

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15
Q

Tis I! Tonald Rump, and of course I can help. You just need to help me with my campaign and you’ll get that hybrid

A

Really, mr butt sir?

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16
Q

it’s RUMP. And it has nothing to do with YOUR rump. But yes, I can do that. I’ll shake on it.

A

Oh no I don’t shake hands. Want some.. mystery bread instead?

17
Q

This will solve another problem, too. You know that plague hoax that’s been going around?

A

Yeah, it killed my aunt and her 7 kids

18
Q

If we save the princess and kill the dragon, the royal family will be too distracted to keep the hoax and the plague will disappear! Kill two dragons with one stone!

A

Not to interrupt, but isn’t it kill two BIRDS with one stone? I mean, you can’t even kill ONE dragon with one stone

19
Q

No worries my very dumb friend. it’s AN ANALOGY!!

A

Um. Not to interrupt this JOYOUS MOMENT but don’t you mean a metaphor?

20
Q

Princess: yeah dude, the dragon never wanted to kill me
EA: wait, your majesty! What’s wrong with your voice?
Leofeu: forget his voice! Where did your accent go?

A

(show up in the drama room not onstage) BREAD!! BREAD FOR SALE!!
(basically just offer bread to ppl in the audience)

21
Q

Where did YOU come from?

A

Where DID i come from? Hey narrator, where did I come from?

22
Q

I’ll be your new narrator, and I have some good, proper plans for a nice fairytale kingdom

A

Heyyy mr new narrator! Want some bread??

23
Q

My name isn’t mr steve. Now. Bread boy.

A

(being chased around, he beats me up :( ) ow. ow. ow. ow.

24
Q

Welcome to the team.

A

Thank you sir.

25
Q

Welcome to the party! I got that from Bruce Willis.

A

Welcome back.

26
Q

And I want to see you two fight again! yeah that was good! Go back to that!

A

wait WHAT

27
Q

AHH PLEASE DONT BURN ME

A

excuse me, demon- uh i mean. uh. dragon person thing? Uh. Laff, leo- lefy- laffy taffy, le-

28
Q

Leofeu?

A

Yeah! That! May we uhhhh,,, team up? To make my bread! Now youre free and i dont have the jester and the knight anymore?

29
Q

after you and your team tried to kidnap and kill me?

A

yeah.

30
Q

As for me, I leave this terrible place and actually narrate the newest disney movie

A

Whats disney?

Drama (2 decks)

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