Empathy Tools - What To Do and How... Flashcards
How many voice tones available to negotiators?
Three.
1. The late-night FM DJ voice
2. The positive/playful voice
3. The direct or assertive voice
The late-night FM DJ voice:
- Use selectively to make a point.
- Inflect your voice downward, keeping it calm and slow.
When done properly, creates an aura of authority and trustworthiness without triggering defensiveness.
The positive/playful voice:
- Should be your default voice.
- It’s the voice of an easygoing, good-natured person.
- Your attitude is light and encouraging.
- The key here is to relax and smile while you’re talking.
The direct or assertive voice:
- Used rarely.
- Will cause problems and create pushback.
Sometimes the only way to get your counterpart
to listen and engage with you is by…
forcing them into a “No.”
How can you force a “NO”?
- intentionally mislabeling one of their emotions or desires or
- asking a ridiculous question—
like, “It seems like you want this project to fail”
“No”- oriented question to reboot an ignored conversation , especially on email is…
“Have you given up on this project?”
The two words that immediately transform any negotiation are
That’s right.
Two words that deceptively signal things are not working are
You’re right.
What opens the
door to changing thoughts and behaviors?
Creating unconditional positive regard
Unconditional Positive Regard is…
…showing complete support and acceptance of a person no matter what that person says or does
Instead of chasing “Yes”, strive for what instead?
That’s Right.
Reaching “that’s right” in a negotiation creates breakthroughs
What is an effective way to trigger a “that’s right”?
Use a summary to trigger a “that’s right”.
What are the building blocks of a summary that triggers “that’s right”?
a label combined with paraphrasing
Identify, rearticulate, and emotionally affirm “the world
according to your counterpart”
