Defusion Metaphor: Hands as Thoughts and Feelings Flashcards
What is a metaphor to introduce Defusion?
The Hands as Thoughts and Feelings metaphor.
What does the metaphor show the client, and why is this important going forward?
It shows the cost of fusion and benefits of defusion. Once the client has learn’t ways to defuse they can actively move towards their goals and values.
How can you make this metaphor more unique to the client, and why is this important?
You can include specific information gathered from the clients life, i.e. their problems, family members, goals and dreams (“your husband Micheal”). This makes the exercise more personal to the client, allowing them to engage and reflect more, as well as helping them remember it easier.
What other options could you use other than just the clients hands?
You could write some specific thoughts and feelings down on a sheet of paper to hold in front of their face.
How would you introduce the exercise?
First start by asking permission to explore the exercise with client. If they agree, move your chair so that you’re side by side facing the room.
What does the view/ rest of the room signify in this metaphor?
All the things that are important in the clients life and really matter: their values, goals, dreams, family (again be specific), all the things they life to do, all the people they care about. As well as, all of their problems and challenges that they need to do in their life (be specific). This includes all the things that the client needs to do in order to make their life work: shopping, cleaning, driving, cooking etc.
What should you then get the client to copy?
You moving your hands to cover your face.
What is the 1st of the 3 things you should get the client to notice?
Missing out: how much the client is missing out, how disconnected and disengaged from the things that really matter to the client. I.e., if the clients partner, who they love, was standing in front of them, how connected could they be with them.
What is the 2nd of the 3 things you should get the client to notice?
Focus: how difficult is it to focus your attention on the things you need to do? Imagine there was an important task in front of you that you needed to do, how well could you focus on that important task?
What is the 3rd of the 3 things you should get the client to notice?
Taking Action: how difficult is it take action on the things that make your life work (be specific, i.e., cook dinner, spend meaningful time with child, drive car).
How would you tie all three up together in a sentence of the impacts of fusion?
So notice how difficult life is when we’re fused to our thoughts and feelings. We’re missing out, we’re cut off and disconnected, it’s hard to focus, and we struggle to take meaningful action on the things that make life work.
Whats the next stage of the exercise?
Move the hands down onto the lap and explore the benefits of defusion.
What would the benefits of defusion be in this metaphor?
More connected, more present and engaged, easier to focus and easier to take action.
Whats the really important caveat to this exercise/ metaphor?
We are not looking to get rid of unwanted thoughts and feelings, or ignore them. Instead, we hold them loosely, with our hands on our laps.
How can even really painful thoughts and feelings be useful?
They can guide us to areas that need attention and work. And if thats not the case they can there simply as a reminder to be kinder to ourselves.
