Confession Flashcards
In the process of confessing your sins to Sharon, you must first confess your sins to
God
Your confession validates that you (Gary) created and
perpetuated a mentally and emotionally abusive marital relationship
Your marital abuse of Sharon is a real and pervasive problem that threatens
Sharon’s mental and emotional health
Sharon was brave and justified to escape from
you
You confessed that your tried to shift the blame for your own inadequacies, your own shortcomings, and your failures, fears and sin onto Sharon. This is called
Gaslighting
When you confessed that you tried to convince Sharon that she was at fault, when you were, you were confessing to a behavior known as
Gaslighting
When gaslighting was successful, you confessed that you did not need to change or to grow up. Life was much easier when
Sharon owned the blame.
Sharon was wise and justified in leaving me for
my gaslighting behavior
Half-truths, quarter-truths, parallel to the truth, but not the truth are all examples of
Distorting the truth
You confessed that when distorting the truth, you first easily convinced yourself that the distortion was the truth, then second you
told Sharon the distortion like it was the Gospel truth.
Telling Sharon that a distortion was the Gospel truth is
sinful, and good grounds for separating from me.
Taking what is true and twisting it to line up with my thinking is a
Perversion of the truth
You confessed that Sharon is right to leave, because she could never
trust you.
You confessed to making up stories to reinforce your way of thinking. This pathology is called
Inventing the truth
By inventing the truth, you confessed that
Sharon is right to leave me for my sinful childish thinking.
“Nope, that’s not right, this is” is a classic form of
Denying the truth
You confessed that denying the truth
Is a sinful tactic you used to keep from facing the truth.
Denying the truth is
as sinful as lying
You confessed that denying the truth is as sinful as lying and that
Sharon is not required to stay together with a liar.
You confessed that even when confronted by your lies, you persisted in
believing, repeating and emphasizing the lies as truth.
About your lying, you confessed that Sharon
is not required to stay together with a liar
Presupposing your agreement with my ideas, thoughts and goals
is disrespectful and sinful
Vocalizing to others your pre-approval to my thought, idea, or goal before speaking to you is
disrespectful and sinful
Vocalizing to others your pre-approval to my idea without speaking to you, is what type of tactic
a sinful, manipulative tactic
The end product of my sinful, manipulative “pre-approval” tactic led to:
Much strife and emotional turmoil on Sharon.
You confessed that to guard her own heart, Sharon is
Certainly right in getting away from my sinful “pre-approval” tactic.
Only asking for the small thing, then pushing for the big thing is
manipulative, and sinful
You confessed that Sharon has no call to live with your
sinful, manipulative behavior
You confessed that by being a bully to Sharon, you
showed yourself not as a true man of God, but as an illusion, and Sharon is correct to separate and leave you.
Taking Sharon’s “no” answer to mean “maybe”, and her “maybe” answer to mean “yes” is
Manipulative and Sinful.
You confessed that your behavior to wear Sharon down by being adamant and trying to force your will upon her was
Sinful bullying, and that Sharon is correct to leave you and separate.
Instead of being a wise and godly man and finding a solution to Sharon’s increasing social isolation and the challenges of caring for Hannah,
You controlled her by allowed her to remain isolated and burdened.
You confessed that Sharon does not deserve to be treated to your
controlling behavior, and her judgement to leave you is correct.
You confessed that you used displays of anger and two-year-old tantrums to prevent Sharon from:
Voicing her concerns or ask questions, and that Sharon did not deserve to be treated this way and her judgement to leave you is correct.
You confessed that you did not take the time or effort to fight for Sharon, and that you lacked
Emotional fortitude
When you should have listened to Sharon with respect and honor
You showed disregard for her thoughts
You confessed that you discounted Sharon’s opinions and
sinfully assigned little value to her sacrificial service
You confessed that no one should be subject to the disrespect you showed Sharon and
Sharon is right to leave me in this fashion.
Your pride blinded you to the greatest worldly treasure that you will ever come close to, and
her name is Sharon.
Your pride drove your marriage apart, and
has damaged all involved with me.
You confessed that pride has
caused Sharon to walk out, without blame.
You confessed that more than just feeling puffed up with pride, you arrogantly put yourself on display as a good and successful man with a good strong marriage. Actually
This is a lie and Sharon was right to expose you as the fraud you are and to leave you.
You confessed that you selfishly put yourself first and did not consider Sharon as an equal. And further,
your selfishness is due cause for Sharon to rightfully walk away and stay away.
The one safe and appropriate place where Sharon should have been able to show her hurts and fears, her joys and tears was :
the last place that Sharon felt safe
You confessed that you walked all over Sharon’s feelings and emotions, and
It is appropriate for Sharon leave a man who treated her feelings and emotions like rubbish.
Raising your voice at Sharon in an aggressive and threatening manner
Is the definition of Verbal Abuse
Verbally abusive behavior is unacceptable, and when directed at your spouse constitutes:
the very definition of an emotionally abusive marriage.
Increasing vocal volume and intensity, and the use of imperative verbs spoken as commands are examples of
verbal abuse
Your tone of voice and your nonverbal communication at times would escalate in pitch and intensity and
would seek to intimidate Sharon into agreement
Large broad gestures with your hands, arms and shoulders and leaning into Sharon’s personal space
are aggressive and menacing, and you confessed that Sharon is so right to leave such abuse.
You confessed that all your sins against Sharon showed a total disregard of
Sharon’s God given boundaries
You confessed that your behavior was not worthy of
Sharon’s love and trust.
You confessed that your tantrums caused Sharon to feel:
unsafe, so much so that she rightly left.
