chapter 8

Question 1

What is a relationship

Answer 1

a connection, association, or attachment that people have with each other

Question 2

3 types of relationships

Answer 2

Platonic: a close relationship that is not physical

Intimate: close and deeply personal contact with another

Interdependent: a relationship in which people need each other or depend on each other in some way

Question 3

Relationship characteristics -

Answer 3

Duration: length of time or relationship

Contact frequency: how often one communicates with the other person

Sharing: the process of revealing and disclosing information about oneself to another

Support: the ability to provide assistance, aid, or comfort to another

Interaction variability: the ability to talk about various topics

Goals: expectations about how the relationship will function and operate

Question 4

What’s the purpose of a relationship?

Answer 4

3 categories of relationships:

• Work-related
• Task-related
• Social reasons

Question 5

What makes a good relationship? -

Answer 5

• Meaningful and beneficial
• Allow people to grow psychologically, emotionally, and physically

Question 6

Reason for attraction -

Answer 6

Physical proximity: commonplaces create opportunities to meet others

Physical attractiveness: important at the beginning of a relationship

Disclosure: when mutual and appropriate, increases support and trust

Similarities:
- compatibility: can partners exist together harmoniously
- similarity thesis: people with similar cultural, ethnic, or religious backgrounds are typically drawn to each other for this reason

• differences
  
  • complementary relationships

Question 7

Exchange theory

Answer 7

People form relationships with people who can offer us rewards that outweigh the costs

Rewards are tangible or intangible things that people want
Costs are undesirable things that people don’t want to expend a lot of energy on

Good relationships have fewer costs and more rewards

Bad relationships will have more costs and fewer rewards

Question 8

Consider the alternatives to the relationship

Answer 8

Comparison level: the minimal standard of what is acceptable in a relationship

Comparison level of alternatives: comparison of what is happening in the relationship and what could be gained in another relationship

Question 9

How do relationships start?

Answer 9

Initiating: a person is interested in making brief contact

Experimenting: small talk occurs as individuals search for commonalities

Intensifying: one expresses feelings of attraction towards the other person

Integrating: individuals take on a new identity as a social unit, giving up their old selves

Bonding: a public announcement is made that the relationship exists

Question 10

How do relationships end?

Answer 10

Differentiating: both people figure out their own identities

Circumscribing: communication decreases, more arguments and working late, less intimacy

Stagnating: the relationship is motionless, communication is restrained and awkward

Avoiding: one creates distance from their partner

Terminating: parties decide to end the relationship and how

Question 11

How do you maintain a relationship?
Partners need…

Answer 11

Strategies to help the relationship be successful and satisfying
Stabilization point between relationship initiation and potential relationship deconstruction

Question 12

Types of strategies

Answer 12

Avoidance strategies
Balance strategies
Direct strategies

Question 13

Relationship maintenance behavior

Answer 13

-Positivity
-Openness
-Assurances
-Sharing tasks
-Social networks
-Conflict-management
-Advice

Question 14

Relationship maintenance

Answer 14

-Relationships will worsen if they are not maintained

-Both partners must feel that there are equal benefits and sacrifices in the relationship for it to sustain

-Maintenance behaviors depend on the type of relationship

-Maintenance behaviors can be used independently or in conjunction with each other

Question 15

How does communication impact relationships?

Answer 15

Relationship changes are usually dependent upon communication

Question 16

Relationship level:

Answer 16

the type of relationship between people evidenced as through their communication

Complementary: one person fulfills the other person’s needs

Symmetrical relationship: partners view themselves as equals within the relationship

Question 17

Content level:

Answer 17

information communicated through denotative and literal meanings of words

Question 18

What are relationship dialectics?

Answer 18

Dialectics: the pushes and pulls found everyday in all types of relationships

Interpersonal interactions provide a way for couples to have the flexibility needed to maintain individuality while maintaining a satisfactory, cohesive union

Life is a social process of dialogue

Relationships manage tensions that cannot be fully resolved

Tensions are both contradictory and interdependent

Question 19

Dialectical Tension

Answer 19

All personal relationships are in a constant state of flux and contradiction

Contradiction is the opposing side to a situation

Rise is when both parties are considered interdependent

Tension is natural and inevitable
Contradictions need to be met with a “both/and” approach

Dialectical tension is how individuals deal with relationship struggles

Question 20

Relational Dialectics Theory

Answer 20

Separation - integration
Predictability - novelty
Openness - closedness
Similarity - difference
Ideal - real

Question 21

How do you manage dialectical tensions?

Answer 21

Denial: individuals respond to one end

Disorientation: individuals who feel overwhelmed fight, freeze, or leave

Alternation: individuals choose one end on different occasions

Recalibration: individuals reframe situation or perspective

Segmentation: individuals compartmentalize different areas

Balance: individuals manage and compromise their needs

Integration: individuals blend different perspectives

Reaffirmation: individuals have the knowledge and accept their differences

Question 22

Why is self-disclosure important in
relationships?

Answer 22

Disclosure is important for mental health and well-being
* Potential reasons for disclosure
* Expression
* Self-clarification
* Social value
* Relationship development
* Social control and influence

Question 23

What do you
need to
consider when
disclosing info?

Answer 23

Four considerations important for
disclosure
* Type of relationship
* Risk-to-benefits ratio
* Appropriateness and relevance to
the situation
* Reciprocity

Question 24

Alternatives to
Self-Disclosure

Answer 24

Deception

Equivocate: An individual doesn’t
answer the question or provide
comments, rather they simply
restate the information presented

Hint: Use indirect or face-saving
comments

Question 25

Romantic
relationships

Answer 25

Love: A multidimensional concept
that can include several different
orientations toward the loved person
* Involves several psychological
features:
* Desire for emotional closeness
* Caregiving
* Emotional dependency
* Separation anxiety
* Willingness to sacrifice

Question 26

How can dating be categorized?

Answer 26

Communication expectations
* Date goals
* Date elements
* Dyadic
* Feelings

Question 27

Script Theory

Answer 27

• Individuals pattern their responses and behaviors during different social
  interactions in order to take control of the situation
• Creating the script requires the individual to imagine their past,
  present, and future

Question 28

Dating Scripts

Answer 28

• Individuals learn patterns of dating behavior from cultural models
• Dating narratives help create dating scripts

Question 29

Six Love Styles

Answer 29

Love styles: an attitude influencing an individual’s perception of love
* Eros: Romantic love involving serial monogamous relationships
* Storge: Love developing slowly out of friendship
* Ludic: Love in which games involving lying and deceit are played
* Agape: Selfless love in which the needs of others are prioritized
* Pragma: Love involving logic and reason
* Mania: Obsessive love that is insecure and requires constant
reassurance