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Marriage Prep > Before Midterm > Flashcards

Before Midterm Flashcards

1
Q

Three views of marriage

A

Couple relationship, social institution, divine institution

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2
Q

Marriage as a couple relationship emphasizes

A

Personal Happiness, emotional closeness, lasting attraction, good communication, sexual satisfaction, couple compatibility

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3
Q

Marriage as a couple relationships lacks:

A

commitment, sacrifice/forgiveness, manage adversity, other stakeholders, sacred meanings, the lord’s purpose,

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4
Q

Institution

A
  • an established law, custom, practice or system.

- an organization or society having a public character

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5
Q

Institutionalism

A

a belief in the sanctity and usefulness of an established institution

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6
Q

The kind of marriage required for exaltation is _____ in duration and ____in quality.

A

eternal in duration

godlike in quality

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7
Q

Marriage as a Divine means

A

that by which something is done or obtained - a method process, or mechanism to accomplish an intended goal:
Institution

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8
Q

A Divine End

A

the reason why something is done; the final goal - the culmination, objective, or purpose of an activity or process.
Purpose of life

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9
Q

Processes not events

A

the three pillars of eternity

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10
Q

Believe that your ____ faith has everything to do with your romance because it does

A

Faith

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11
Q

the core of discipleship

A

obedience, consecration and sacrifice.

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12
Q

Spirituality yields two fruits.

A

First inspiration to know what to do.

Second the power or capacity to do it.

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13
Q

the capacity =

A

repentance

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14
Q

What does it mean when we say that marriage is an ordinance?

A

It is a sacred formal act performed by the authority of the priesthood.

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15
Q

What does it mean when we say that marriage is a covenant?

A

remember the divine triangle
God
Self Spouse

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16
Q

How does embracing marriage as on ordinance and a covenant change the meaning and nature of marriage in our lives?

A

Shepherd or Hireling?

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17
Q

Cleave

A

to remain attached, devoted or faithful to

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18
Q

Practices of Cleaving

A
  • Nurture the sacred in your marriage.
  • Confide in & counsel w/ your spouse
  • Seek and consider outside counsel together prayerfully.
  • Respect the “inner fence of marriage”
  • Practice the “rite of marriage”
  • Allow the atonement to be active in your marriage.
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19
Q

Help meet

A

meet means equal

original Hebrew “equal strength to rescue”

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20
Q

Equal Counsel and

A

Equal Consent

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21
Q

Need to distinguish between

A

Leadership and Decision Making

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22
Q

Difference between presiding in the church and presiding in the family

A

church is hierarchical and the home is patriarchal

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23
Q

The 5 Ps of Equal Partnership

A

Power, Purpose, Possibility, Participation, Prominence

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24
Q

Husbands 3 Ps

A

Preside Provide Protect

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25
Q

the 1 N

A

Nurture

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26
Q

Attachment Theory

A

this theory suggest that children come into the world biologically pre-programmed to form attachments with others, because this will help them to survive.

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27
Q

Avoid the tradition myth

A

Marriage = Hierarchy

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28
Q

Avoid the “Modern Myth”

A

Marital Equality = Sameness

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29
Q

Fear Based Metaphors

A

-Negative portrayal of sexual intimacy
-Discourage dialogue
-Precept vs. Principle
broken plates

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30
Q

Abstinence-Based Metaphors

A

-Added emphasis on context
-Correct, but incomplete
-Behavioral / Individual
“Marriage Finish Line”
Cookies on Fast Sunday

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31
Q

Spiritual Dimension

A

Meaning purpose - progression
Need: Sexual Meaning
Attributes: Positive & Faithful

32
Q

Physical Dimension

A

Attraction- Pleasure - Health
Need: Sexual Satisfaction
Attributes: Knowledgeable & Aware

33
Q

Emotional Dimension

A

Security - Attachment - Validation
Need: Sexual Belonging
Attributes: Secure and Authentic

34
Q

Relational Dimension

A

Intimacy - Mutual - Love
Need: Sexual Unity
Attributes: Responsive & Loving

35
Q

Carnal-Minded Sexuality

A
  • Self-centered
  • Present moment
  • Satisfies a “need”
  • Physical
  • Body focused
  • Light-minded, casual
36
Q

Spiritually-Minded Sexuality

A
  • Other-centered
  • Past/present/future
  • Fulfill divine purposes
  • spiritual, emotional, physical, & relational
  • Body + spirit = Soul
  • Indicator of our spiritual condition
37
Q

The Deinstitutionalization of Marriage

A

The meaning of marriage- “from institution to a companionship”

38
Q

Paradigms of modernity

A
  1. Secularism
  2. Individualism
  3. Materialism
  4. Hedonism
39
Q

What is a paradigm?

A

A set of assumptions, concepts, values, and practices that constitutes a way of viewing reality for the community that shares them.

40
Q

Secularism

A

Secularism is the belief that answers to life are found through rational means. A secular approach turns to intellectual or popular sources of knowledge and devalues spiritual meanings.

41
Q

Individualism

A

Individualism is the belief that rights, freedoms, and privileges of individuals should be given higher priority than the rights of society or groups – families serve the needs of individuals, not individuals serving the needs of families.

42
Q

Materialism

A

Materialism is the belief that material objects, needs, and considerations are important and should be emphasized. Happiness comes from accumulating money, tangible possessions, and participating in consumer activities

43
Q

Hedonism

A

Hedonism is the belief that it is the accepted nature of people to seek pleasure and avoid pain as the highest good. “Good” equals experiences that are fun, comfortable, stimulating, and pleasurable. “Bad” equals experiences that not fun or pleasurable. Seeking physical pleasure is given high priority and emphasis.

44
Q

Benefits of Marriage

A

Married people live longer, suffer less from illness, and recover quicker. They also exhibit fewer risk-taking behaviors and have the lowest rates of suicide and alcoholism.

Married people are happier and enjoy higher well-being in all facets of life. They suffer significantly less from depression and other psychiatric disorders.

45
Q

More Benefits of Marriage.

A

Married people are better off economically, spend less, and save more. Two parent families are a powerful barrier against poverty.

Married people are more fulfilled in their sexual relations than other sexually active people. They are less likely to be disinterested in or to feel anxiety over sex.

These benefits do not extend to cohabiting relationships and apply in lesser degree to remarriages.

46
Q
  1. Guiding Principle
A

Becoming, Finding, Committing,

Becoming should precede finding, b and c before and after marriage.

47
Q

Intergeneration Transmission

A

the transmitting of “lifestyle” from one generation to the next.

48
Q

Two types of Self-Centeredness

A

Type I: Pride- “self-elevation”

Type II: Envy - “self deprecation”

49
Q

Amae

A

“Amae describes the innate need and desire within each person to depend on and feel connected to other people, especially in relationships of love and intimacy. In a sense, Amae is the desire to receive love. Through the fulfillment of our amae we find not only security but also freedom and meaning”

50
Q

Amae

A

The receiving of Christ-like love

51
Q

German translation of Amae

A

“Freiheit in Geborgenheit”
Freedom through emotional security
free from vs. free for

52
Q

the 3 grand prizes of mortal life

A

Receive a physical body
progress & grow spiritually
Form an Eternal Marriage and Family

53
Q

Trends contributing to the deinstitutionalization of marriage

A 
Changing division of labor in the home
out of wedlock childbirth
the growth of cohabitation
the legalization of same-sex partnerships
Historically high divorce rates
Declining Marriage rate
54
Q

Dtm caused by Secularism

A

Spiritual waywardness, spiritual apathy

55
Q

dtm cause by Individualism

A

selfishness, careerism, divorce, delay of marriage, intentional childlessness, narcissism, false self-esteem

56
Q

Dtm cause by materialism

A

Careerism, Debt/ financial strain.

57
Q

Dtm cuase by Hedonism

A

Sexual Immorality, addictions, Leisure/ recreation

58
Q

Four domains of the ecology of marriage

A

Family of origin, couple processes, climate, marital outcomes. individuals readiness

59
Q

Key factors of stability across generations

A 
Quality of parents marriage
Intergenerational transmission of divorce 
Quality of parent child relationship
Overall family environment
teen peer and dating experiences.
60
Q

three aspects of mature love

A

Emotions (feeling - heart)
Cognitive (attitudes mind)
Behavior (actions - strenght)

61
Q

RT: CoML Emotional

A

Lasting passion
companionship
contentment

62
Q

RT: CoML Cognitive

A 
Love is chosen
commitment
trust
sharing
sacrifice
63
Q

RT: CoML Behavior

A

Environment of development

Allow space for growth

64
Q

RT: CoIL Emotinal

A 
Possessiveness
Jealousy
Infatuation
Preoccupation
Anxiety
65
Q

RT: CoIL Cognitive

A

Love is external

Out of control

66
Q

Behavior

A 
Selfish
Lustful 
Self Needs
Clinging
Demanding
67
Q

Fowers four marital virtues

A

Friendship
Fairness
Generosity
Loyalty

68
Q

Virtue of Friendship

A

Embodied in the characteristics of caring helpfulness, and companionship Feeling understood
Avoid parallel mariage
Studies find that lasting marriage are ones in which spouses create a deep _____ through shared activities, values, and conversation

69
Q

Virtue of Fairness

A

fostered when spouses are equal partners and share the work of family life together
Men do water chores
women help provide as well
Spouses feel a sense of partnership and teamwork

70
Q

Virtue of generosity

A

Exhibited when spouses give freely to one another, forgive each other, and see the est in each other.
forgiveness
transformation of motivation

71
Q

Virtue of Loyalty

A

a covenant-based commitment to one’s relationship in spite of difficulties that inevitably arise over the course of marriage
shift from me to we .

72
Q

8 ways to effectively listen

A
  1. stop talking
  2. put the speaker at ease
  3. pay attention to nonverbal language
  4. listen for what is not said
  5. know exactly what the other person is saying
  6. be patient and don’t interrupt
  7. hold your temper
  8. Empathize with the speaker
73
Q

Clear-Sending communication

A

say what we mean and mean what we say

74
Q

Authenticity

A

never fake, deceptive, pretending etc.

75
Q

I-statements

A

describe your ideas and feelings, take responsibility for your thoughts and emotions
avoid judgmental tone
build trust through disclosure
invited open disclosure from others

Marriage Prep (1 decks)

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