Bad Auditions By Bad Actors Flashcards
CD:Hi.
Meg McCrossen. How are you? I was running late from a movement rehearsal but. Do you mind if I take a moment to warm up?
CD:No,although we do have other people coming in-
Of course. It’ll only take a minute. I just have a hard time auditioning unless I’m completely centered.
CD: No, um, if you want we could bring someone in-
Thank you, but, no, I’ll only be a minute.
Rodger: um do you think I could go to the bathroom real quick?
Ca-ca-ca-CAAAAA! HEEEEEE! MeeeEEEHH! MeeEEEHH! SHHHHhhhhh…
CD: Um… she said she’d only be a minute so…
Eeeeeh.wwwwwaaaaa. WWWWAAAAA!!!!!
CD: I think…. Okay, I think she’s having a seizure. Rodger call the-
I’m ready to begin now
CD: Okay , great,that was quiet.
I’M READY!TO!BEGIN! BE!BE!BE!BEGIN! NOOOOOOOOOOOOW!
….
I‘m ready to begin now! I’m ready! READY! RE! RE! I! I’MMMMMM! READY to begin… NOW! NOW! NOW! NoOOOOOOWWWWW! huh,huh,huh,huh,huh
CD; Okay,Meg, we really need to get started
We need to get started.
CD: Yes, we’re running behind
We’re running behind!
What are you doing?!?
What are you doing?!
I’m not going to do a Meisner exercise with you!
I’m not going to do a Meisner exercise with you!
I’m serious!
I’m serious!
CD: stop this at once!
Stop this at…. aaaaAAAAHHHHH! Merrily we roll along! Roll along! Roll along! ToOOOOOO-DAAAAYYYY!
…
Sorry, I never give a good audition unless I’m completely centered
