Baby Scene Flashcards

1
Q

Good to see ya, buddy! Mommy, Fred’s here!

A

Oh, there you are, stranger!

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2
Q

I bought this for Frank Junior.

A

Oh, isn’t that sweet, honey?

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3
Q

Sweet, sweet, sweet!

A

Make sure the eyes don’t bite off, honey. So Fred, Fred, Fred, how are you?

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4
Q

No, they’re on there, Mommy.

A

Make sure the stuffing can’t fall out. Oh Frank and I couldn’t be more blissful! I didn’t even know what bliss was until…

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5
Q

It’s childproof, Mommy!

A

Then what a lovely present! So Fred, Fred, Fred, tell us- anybody new in your life?

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6
Q

I’ve been dating- no one special.

A

Awwwwwwww!!!

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7
Q

No, I’m fine, I…

A

Ah Fred, there was a time when all we used to do was…

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8
Q

…set up our single friends…

A

…But since we’ve had…

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9
Q

…Frank Junior…

A

…It’s been all dirty diapers…

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10
Q

…Dirty, dirty di-di!

A

…And breastfeeding…

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11
Q

…Slurpie, slurpie, slurpie!

A

And who’s had the time?!

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12
Q

Hey, can I go in and look?

A

Oh, he’s just sleeping now…

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13
Q

…Though we’d love you to…

A

…We don’t want to disturb him…

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14
Q

…Though we’d love you to.

A

Hey, how ‘bout watching some slides instead?

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15
Q

What a swell idea! It’s all set up!

A

Say “yes!” Say “yes!” Say “yes!”

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16
Q

Uh… yes.

A

Okay!

Okay, here’s Frank Junior…

17
Q

…Getting into the car for the first time…

A

…And here’s Frank Junior…

18
Q

…Going on a car ride for the first time…

A

…And here’s Frank Junior…

19
Q

…Throwing up in the car for the first time…

A

…And here’s Frank Junior…

20
Q

…Getting his first horsey ride…

A

Honey?

21
Q

Yes, honey?

A

You said “horsey.”

22
Q

No!

A

Yes! x3

Fred?

23
Q

I’m beginning to talk to adults like I talk to…

A

…Frank Junior!

Freeze! Was that him?!

24
Q

Anyway, so I haven’t had much luck finding a job…

A

Wait! Brainstorm!

25
Q

What?!

A

You know what Fred should do?

26
Q

What?!

A

Become a single mommy and adopt a baby!

27
Q

You know, Fred, before I met Marie…

A

…I was half a person…

28
Q

…And I was half a person…

A

…But then we got married…

…And now we’re a whole.

29
Q

But then we had Frank Junior, and I realised…

A

What?

30
Q

I was actually only one-third of a person, and Marie was only one-third of a person, and Frank Junior is one-third of a person, and now we’re really a whole!

A

Thank you for fertilising my egg.

31
Q

Thank you for being fruitful and multiplying.

A

Thank you for having a decent sperm count.

32
Q

Freeze!

A

What?!